Love For Sale
by MarillaT'Pel
Summary: AU.  James T. Kirk is abducted by slavers on his way to a family visit.  Elsewhere, Spock begins to enter Pon Farr with no time to return home to find a mate.  Guess what happens next?
1. Chapter 1

**Here is the mature story I have been working up the courage to write for months. Yes, I know the title sounds like it belongs on the title of some romance novel. If anyone can think of anything better, I'll gladly take your suggestions**

**Warnings: This story contains slavery, somewhat dubious consent, and some descriptions of past events later on.**

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><p>Chapter 1<p>

James T. Kirk (Jim to his friends) awoke in a strange room that resembled a small, one person apartment, with kitchen facilities and a door on one end. On the other end, closer to the bed was a second door. Everything was clean and bright. It was a little chilly, but nothing that couldn't be solved by curling up under the covers. He was lying on a rather large bed, queen sized if he had to guess, and right next to it was some monitoring equipment. It seemed to be tracking his vitals, though he couldn't see anything hooking him up to it. He tried to remember what had happened. He'd been traveling on a small merchant ship. He'd played the pilot in cards and won, taking the ride instead of the guy's money. He'd been on his way to Deneva, to visit his brother's family. He wasn't poor, but he wasn't a big spender either, so he'd been glad to get a free ride. The pilot had been glad to give the ride instead of paying, as he'd bet more than he'd initially meant to, and Deneva was a stop on his list. He remembered some turbulence from the room where he'd been sleeping, and that was it.

As he wondered just what could have happened and why he didn't remember anything, the doors at the far end of the room hissed open, revealing an Orion female in some kind of white uniform with a simple design that was rather shaped like a small sand castle on it, carrying what looked like a digital clipboard. She saw that he was awake and came over to check something on the monitors.

"Where am I?" He croaked out, shocked by how weak his voice sounded. "Why am I here?"

"You're at The Pleasure Palace, a Ferengi-owned establishment. You were brought here after your transport's cargo was acquired. What's your name?"

"James Kirk." He replied without thinking. She nodded.

"Just checking." She went back to studying the monitors. He was trying to process what he'd been told. _Ferengi?_ They were usually content to rip people off by overcharging and underpaying. They were pretty cowardly when physically challenged. They were wary of bigger organizations like the Federation, though small privately owned transport vessels like the one he'd been traveling on were usually considered fair game.

"What happened to the rest of the crew?" He asked. Maybe he could find a way out if he could find the others.

"They were left aboard the vessel. None of them were female, so there was no point in selling them, though an exception was made in your case." She looked him over admiringly. "Humans, attractive ones that is, have become increasingly popular, and you were obviously pretty enough to make a sale." She pulled a small recording device from the clipboard and began taking pictures of him. "These should do nicely." She studied him closely. "Your I.D. says you're twenty-one, but you could probably pass for younger, maybe nineteen or so. A lot of the customers like them young." She turned to leave, and Jim snapped out of his stupor.

"You can't keep me here! I'm a Federation citizen!" He attempted to stand up and noticed for the first time that there was some kind of electronic cuff on his right ankle. It seemed to be magnetically bound to the metal bedpost. She smiled at him with a kind of false pity.

"You may as well make the best of it. No one knows where you are, and no one here will care what you want as long as they get what they paid for." She gestured around the room. "This is your home now. In the cabinets you will find plenty of food fit for humans. The tap is working and the water is clean. You'll need to be strong for when you start taking requests. You'll be expected to clean up after yourself. Through that door is the bathroom, where you'll find plenty of contraceptive devices and lubricant, as well as the uniforms you will wear. You'll be expected to bathe once a day, and to be clean and presentable at all times. You'll be given two weeks of recovery from the residual effects of your injuries." She paused to set some kind of padd on one of the countertops.

"Here you'll find everything you'll need to know about our clientele. Their sexual needs and such. There is also a list of rules you will be expected to follow with them. It would be in your best interests to use your recovery time to learn it well. Any disobedience will be promptly disciplined. Good behavior will earn you privileges. Your ankle cuff will deliver a debilitating shock to your system if you attempt to leave the room without permission." She said all of this with a kind of fake pleasantness, like she was giving a lecture or presenting a business deal. It was clear she'd done this many times before. She pressed something on her 'clipboard', and the door opened. She paused inside the doorway and looked back at him. "Welcome to The Pleasure Palace." She pressed something else and the ankle cuff suddenly fell free from the post. She stepped outside the room and the doors shut behind her.

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><p>Aboard his ambassadorial cruiser <em>Khio'ri<em>, Sarek of Vulcan was struggling to resist the urge to pace back and forth like a nervous human parent. His son Spock had been acting rather strange lately. He normally had a very docile personality, but had lately been short with anyone who spoke to him, including Sarek.

Sarek had initially believed it to be the result of what had happened with the Vulcan Science Academy. Due to some disciplinary issues in Spock's childhood, his testing for admissions had been delayed. He had been forced to wait until he was twenty-three years old before he was allowed to take his exams, when all his age-mates had done so at eighteen. He had succeeded admirably, even by Vulcan standards. However, the Ministers hadn't seen that. They'd only seen that Spock had managed to succeed in spite of his mother's presence in his life and in his genetics, and they'd said as much.

Sarek knew that they'd been testing him, to see if his influence in Spock's upbringing would be enough to suppress any response to the insult. He himself had been tested many times by colleges and superiors wanting to see if he would react to insults to himself and his family. Spock hadn't batted an eye. He'd thanked the Ministers for the good news, and then turned them down in the same breath. Sarek had confronted Spock later, making his surprise and disappointment obvious, demanding to know why he'd turned down the admission. Spock's explanation for his actions had stopped him dead in his tracks.

"_I cannot continue to deny a part of myself, no matter how it may affect your reputation."_

He'd been shocked into silence. He knew he'd impressed upon Spock the consequences that his actions would have on his family's honor, but he'd never expected for Spock to feel that he was doing it all in his own best interests.

It had been three weeks since the whole affair. He and Spock hadn't actually spoken since. What little communication there was between them took place through typed messages. They hardly even spent time in the same room together, unless one of them was just passing through. Spock was now rooming with a former classmate rather than sharing the ambassador's family quarters.

He heard the doors of sickbay opening and turned to face the healer. He was beckoned inside. He was led over to where Spock was waiting and left to speak with him alone.

"Spock?" He waited with barely concealed anxiousness. Spock spoke softly without looking at him.

"I am entering my Time. I have perhaps one week before I enter the Plak Tow. Possibly less."

Later, Sarek stood alone in his quarters. He was currently awaiting someone. He was also going over his options. He was eventually headed for Earth, where important ambassadorial meetings, and his human wife, awaited him. She there visiting family and old friends, and planned to return with him when his business was complete. It was to be Spock's first visit to Earth, and his first time meeting his mother's family in person. It was meant to be a reward of sorts. Sarek had believed that if Spock was deemed Vulcan enough to be granted entry into the Science Academy, he would surely be able to resist being tempted by any human influences. The only reason Sarek was still bringing him now was because his wife had been so eager to have him finally see her home and her family was expecting him.

In addition to heading for Earth, Sarek had also been instructed to transport three ambassadors and their assistants from their home worlds to Earth for their own talks. One of them was Bolian, and might be at least somewhat amenable to stopping. The other two, however, were a Tellarite and an Andorian. Andorians often needed little provocation to complain when it came to Vulcans. Tellarites never needed any provocation at all to complain about anyone or anything. Sarek could make excuses enough for tardiness if it was only himself, but it could cause potentially significant trouble for the Vulcan government if he was unable to get the others to Earth on time.

As he mused on this, a soft tone rang, alerting him to someone's presence at the door.

"Come." He said. The doors opened to reveal Stonn, a science student and one of Spock's only real friends, and the former classmate he was bunking with. They had not always been on such good terms. Stonn, like many other Vulcan children, had often taunted Spock about his mixed heritage. Things had grown worse after Spock had been pre-bonded to T'Pring.

But then, when they had all reached age eighteen Spock, knowing that he and T'Pring could never have a harmonious relationship, had renounced their bond. He had then, with the help of his mother, persuaded Sarek to convince T'Pring's parents to have her linked to Stonn. He'd known for years that they held a great deal of esteem for each other, and that their bond would be a prosperous one.

After learning that he had helped bring about their pre-bonding, Stonn and T'Pring had both developed a new respect for Spock. Neither of them made derogatory comments about his mixed heritage anymore. They had become cordial, even friendly to him. Stonn's family had also been grateful. Stonn had known T'Pring all his life and had seemingly rejected every other mind his family attempted to link him to. They had even invited Spock to their bonding ceremony four years later, which coincidentally had been brought on by Stonn's own premature Time. He was now on board to visit Earth with them for an exhibit at Starfleet Academy about marine life, something very rare on Vulcan. It was for these reasons he knew that he could trust Stonn with Spock's predicament, discuss with him how to handle the situation and, if necessary, help him come up with a solution in private.

"Stonn." He said, formally.

"Ambassador." He replied, equally formal. "You summoned me here?"

"Yes." Sarek said, "And I must ask that what I say to you does not leave this room."

"Of course." Said Stonn. Sarek steeled himself for what he had to say next.

"Spock is entering his Time." Stonn's eyes widened slightly in realization of what that meant. "He will be in the grips of the Fever before we can reach Earth, or even if we attempt to return to Vulcan. I do not know what else can be done for him. I wish to know if you have any suggestions." Stonn did not reply immediately. Sarek could see that he was very carefully going through every possibility in his head. Finally he spoke, though he was somewhat hesitant.

"I was in the mess hall two days ago and overheard a conversation between the Andorian ambassador and his aide. The aide was complaining about a lack of…intimate contact in recent months due to his work schedule. The ambassador then spoke of a place he had considered visiting, an establishment managed by the Ferengi, a high level brothel of sorts. He spoke of the excellent 'service' he had heard that they have there, though he bemoaned the price that prevented him from traveling there." Stonn turned to the star charts Sarek had on his wall. He pointed to a small moon known only as Omega Two. Sarek was not familiar with it. He was however, familiar with Omega, its planet. Omega was not a Federation world, but it was right on the edge of Federation Space, and often did business with Federation ships in need of spare parts. Just like that, Sarek had a plan.

"How is our supply of dilithium crystals?" Stonn considered his question.

"We are one third of the way through our allotted amount for this mission." He paused for a moment, then continued. "It is more than we might have expected to go through at this point in our journey. It would be logical for us to schedule a stop at Omega for the purpose of replenishing our supply, in the interest of the safety of the ship and its passengers."

"Indeed." Said Sarek, satisfied. "I will speak to the chief engineer immediately. And if Spock happens to fall ill while we are waiting, I will be forced to take him off the ship to see someone about helping him."

"Of course." Agreed Stonn. "By my estimation, if we alter our destination coordinates immediately, we will reach Omega in three days." Sarek nodded.

"See to it." Stonn left to carry out his requests. Sarek waited a moment, then also left his quarters. He made his way to the quarters Spock was sharing with Stonn. He requested entrance and was let in. He found Spock sitting on the floor in a meditation robe, obviously attempting to meditate.

"What is it?" He snapped. His attempts were clearly unsuccessful.

"We will be making an unscheduled detour in three days. During that time, you will need to remain in your quarters. You must not come into contact with anyone, lest you lash out at them."

"Understood." Muttered Spock darkly. Sarek shifted a bit. This was going to be the hard part.

"Once we have reached our destination, you and I will travel, via shuttle, to a nearby moon. Our explanation for all of this will be that you are ill and we have gone in search of professional help unavailable aboard the ship." It was, in a way, the truth. It was simply worded more tastefully. Spock's eyes widened as he processed the words, and the meaning behind them.

"You mean to pay a prostitute to assist me through my Time." He rose up unsteadily from the floor, shaking his head. "I will not agree to this!"

"You do not have a choice Spock." Sarek told him. "Even if we could return to Vulcan, we would not arrive in time." Spock glared at him.

"And what if I happen to form a bond with the person you hire? I seriously doubt that is included in the services they are willing to offer!"

"Any bond you form would doubtlessly be light, just a small link. It could be severed by one of our healers." Sarek fought to keep his voice even and low. Was this what human parents went through when their children entered puberty? Disrespect and disregard for everything they said? "As I said, you have no choice. You will die otherwise."

"Very well!" Snarled Spock. "I will go. I am merely surprised that you would risk such shame on the family name! Now leave me!" Sarek just nodded his head and did as Spock demanded. He could just hear his beloved wife now.

"_You sent our child to a hooker! What the hell is wrong with you!"_

He wondered if either one of them would forgive him for this.

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><p><strong>So, I guess it's not hard to see where this is going. I know I got off to a pretty abrupt start with this. If you enjoyed this at all, you're probably upset that this was so short, but it's kind of just a prologue. And yes, Spock, Stonn, and T'Pring are all pretty friendly in this story, though I don't think she'll be making an actual appearance. Also, the name of Sarek's ship is a Vulcan word for star. <strong>

**On a different note, I learned that the title I chose is the name of a song(s) that I've never listened to, and possibly some stories too. I didn't know that when I was writing it, so I just want to be any kind of confusion that there's a connection when there isn't. I'll be updating once a week, (I mean it this time)! Please review and boost my confidence!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm a little overwhelmed by the response the first chapter got! I hope no one regrets putting it on their favorites as the story goes on. You're getting this chapter a little early because I'm having a really weird/bad/exhausting time at work and could use a little positivity!**

**I'm wondering if anyone can help me with a little problem I'm having. Someone left some rather negative reviews for one of my stories, and I'd like to delete them. The problem is, I can only find how to get rid of anonymous ones. Can anyone help me?**

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><p>Chapter 2<p>

Jim knew he'd been at the Palace for a total of six days now, and it was coming up on seven. Eventually he'd been forced to don the uniform, a kind of bright white outfit that resembled a surfer's suit with arms and legs that went to his wrists and ankles, or go naked in front of the camera that was now monitoring him. He hadn't seen anyone else at first. His only clue that anyone else had been in the room was the alterations made to the monitoring equipment, no doubt done while he was sleeping. He also had reason to believe that something in the room, possibly the ankle cuff, was what allowed the monitors to keep track of him without any kind of tubes or wires attaching them to his body.

He could feel his body recovering and dreaded every moment of it. He knew in another seven days, he would be expected to start servicing customers. He'd almost had one by accident yesterday, a Caitian who'd been led to his room by mistake. Due to that little incident, he now knew for sure the effects of the metal ankle cuff he was wearing. Hence, the new surveillance measures.

Having had nothing else to do except try to plan an escape, he'd gone through the rules on the padd he'd been given, hoping they would tell him something he could work with. It was basically all 'the customer is always right' and 'make as much money for the owners as possible' and shit. He'd also gone through some of the stuff about the clientele. In addition to Caitians, they accepted Orions, Tellarites, Andorians, and even Romulans. Really, anyone who would pay their outrageous prices. They seemed to have slaves from all of those species as well. According to this information, he was the first and only human there. Somehow, that didn't comfort him much.

He'd also looked into the information on the customers sexual desires. He felt a little sick as he read over it. He'd known for a long time that he was bi-sexual, and he'd done his research on the subject. While he knew he was at least a little interested in possibly having that kind of sexual experience one day, he'd never known a man he trusted or respected enough to allow that kind of intimacy. However, if he didn't find a way out of here soon, he wasn't going to have a choice.

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><p>Sarek stood before a shuttle with Stonn and an unconscious Spock. Spock's condition had worsened faster than they had predicted. He had tried to attack Sarek when he went to his quarters to inform him that it was time to leave. Sarek had used the nerve pinch to subdue him, followed that with a tranquilizer, and then secured his arms behind him with a pair of binders. Then, he'd called Stonn to help him move the unconscious Spock from his quarters to the shuttle bay.<p>

Stonn helped him get Spock inside the shuttle and propped up in a seat. He held Spock in place while Sarek fastened his straps, his hands still bound behind him. Stonn had offered to come along, but Sarek needed someone who knew what was actually happening to remain behind and cover for them. Stonn simply accepted his wishes and bade him a safe and speedy trip.

Sarek turned on the shuttle and steered it out of the bay. He set the autopilot for The Pleasure Palace at as fast a speed as he safely make it go. Then he turned back to look at his son. He knew his wife had been concerned about Spock's pre-bonding to T'Pring, and had probably been the least surprised of everyone when it was dissolved. However, she had gone along with it, because she had been quite frightened by the pain Sarek went through during Pon Farr, even if it was only for a short time, and did not want her son's life to end in such a painful and humiliating way.

While Sarek had made it perfectly clear that he wanted Spock to be the ideal Vulcan, a part of him had secretly hoped that his son's human heritage would spare him this nightmarish part of Vulcan life. He let out a very human sigh. He had six hours until they arrived at the Palace. The tranquilizer would keep him out until they arrived. Sarek began entering the contact information for the establishment, to let them know he was arriving.

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><p>Barbo, one of the co-managers and owners of The Pleasure Palace couldn't believe his luck. He immediately summoned his cousin and fellow co-manager Turot. The two of them had waited years to hoard enough money between them to buy out the other owners and be able to keep all the profits from the Palace for themselves. The doors opened to reveal Turot.<p>

"What is it?" He asked. Barbo grinned at him and beckoned for him to sit down in the chair on the other side of his desk.

"I just got a call from a big one, the one we've been waiting for." He waited a moment for that to sink in before he continued. "A Vulcan merchant is on his way with his son. He needs discretion, and someone who can take about three days of rough intercourse. He hasn't outright said it, but if my information serves me right, his son will die without a partner." Turot also began to smile.

"What father wouldn't give any amount to save his son's life?" He asked slyly.

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><p>Sarek's shuttle touched down on The Palace's VIP landing area. He moved back to the passenger compartment and unstrapped his still unconscious son, shifting him into a special hoverchair that Sarek pushed down the ramp. He also unlocked Spock's binders and refastened them so that his hands were in front of him. He was led inside by two Orion women. One of them offered to take Spock's chair, but he refused. They led him to an office. Inside were two Ferengi, who immediately introduced themselves.<p>

"Hello, Mr. Sasak." Said the slightly taller of the two. It was the name he'd given them, along with the equally fabricated story that he was a very wealthy businessman. "My name is Turot, and this is my associate Barbo. We've been reviewing your requests and we think we have a list of good possible candidates." Before he could even begin to describe them, Spock began to stir in his chair. His eyes opened and he looked around the room groggily. Sarek waited to see how Spock would behave now that he was conscious again, the drug having worn off faster than he anticipated.

Spock seemed rather sluggish and unfocused, but he was already starting to struggle against the binders on his wrists, until he caught sight of something across the room. In an instant, he was wide awake, out of the chair and in front of a small monitor screen on the wall behind the desk in the office. He raised his shackled hands to touch the screen and stared at it almost…longingly. Sarek looked at the screen as well.

It showed a room with a young human male inside. Even from a distance, he could see that the man was in his early twenties, had blue eyes and blond hair, and had the kind of fit build that he obviously worked hard to maintain. At the moment, he seemed to be lying on his bed studying a padd. Sarek frowned a little. The average Vulcan had three times the strength of the average human. On the other hand, his wife had handled his past Pon Farrs quite enthusiastically. She'd been tired afterward, certainly, but she'd recovered in just a few days or so under his careful attention. He decided he might as well ask.

"What of that human?" He asked the two Ferengi businessmen. One of them, Turot, looked away from Spock at the monitor.

"Oh, he's-" his stopped when Barbo placed a hand on his arm.

"Do you think you could perhaps leave us to discuss something for a moment?" He started to move toward Spock, as if to pull him away from the monitor. Spock tore his gaze away from the screen to glare at him. Barbo immediately moved backwards, his hands up in a gesture of placation. "Or, we'll just step outside." He grabbed Turot's arm and dragged him out the door, letting it shut behind them.

As soon as he was sure they wouldn't be heard, Turot hissed at Barbo.

"What are you thinking? He's not supposed to have customers for another week, and he's extremely undisciplined."

"Exactly!" Barbo hissed back. "No one but the two of us knows the Vulcans are here, so it makes sense that we'd give them someone that no one else will expect to be working!"

"But what about his attitude?" Protested Turot. "He attacked that Caitian client the other day." Barbo remembered that. He'd seen the client after he'd been led to Kirk's room by mistake. The guy had figured since he'd never had a human, he'd just go with it, but after barely a minute he was begging to be let out of the room. By the time the door had opened, he'd been bruised, bloody, and missing a few clumps of fur from his upper body.

"That could be the solution to this problem too." He said excitedly. "If anything I've heard about Vulcans is true, he'll be mindless, and pretty rough on him. We'll use the next week to get him recovered quickly, and if he gives us anymore trouble after that, we'll just tell him that we've got another Vulcan client in the same state who's eager to meet him."

"We've never had a Vulcan client before this." Turot reminded him.

"He won't know that." Replied Barbo. "He'll be begging us not to give him to another Vulcan after being used by one in heat. We'll make a fortune on him. I've checked; we lost a lot of potential customers in the past because they were interested in humans and we didn't have any. Once Kirk accepts his role here, we'll have them lining up at his door." Turot nodded slowly.

"I see. This could work." Barbo nodded.

"Just follow my lead." They both went back into Barbo's office. Barbo looked at Sarek. "James is pretty booked up for the next couple of months, humans are quite popular you know, but for the right price, I think we can arrange for him to spend a few days with your son."

Sarek knew the price the Ferengi named was probably at least three or four times what they usually charged for their best employees, but he didn't care. All that mattered was making sure that his son survived. After that, they would forget this whole unpleasantness and continue on their way. Spock would be alive and have plenty of time to find a mate who would be better suited to his status. Still, there were a few things he wanted to know first.

"Why is he under surveillance?" Turot glanced at the screen before answering.

"He's currently our only human employee. Some of our clients like to observe him and admire him from afar before meeting him."

"Also," added Barbo, inspired, "we like to check in on him sometimes. He rather enjoys the rough, domineering types and sometimes needs to be looked after a bit. He's still rather young, doesn't always know his own limits." Sarek considered. He knew better than to trust the word of a Ferengi buisnessman, but he could also tell that this was indeed a very well maintained facility and the man on the screen, James, was clean and healthy. He nodded.

"He will do." He told the managers. "However, I will only pay you half now. I will give you the rest later, after I am satisfied that my son is well." The Ferengi exchanged a pained glance.

"Fine." Muttered Barbo, reluctantly. He jerked his head at Spock, whose eyes had never left the screen in front of him. "You'll have to keep him under control until we get there, or you'll also be paying for any damages or injuries he causes." He reached for a remote control and switched off the monitor, then set it back on the desk again. As soon as the screen went black, Spock made a sound like a wounded animal and prodded at the monitor frantically with his bound hands. Turot smiled at Sarek.

"Why don't you get him ready, and we'll just take a moment to inform James of the change in schedule?" The two Ferengi exchanged a smirk with each other. Then they stepped outside again. Sarek turned to Spock.

"Spock," he said, forcing calm he didn't really feel, "do you wish to meet James?" He touched the monitor screen lightly, hoping that Spock would make the connection. "I will bring you to him if you wish it." Whatever remained of Spock's intellect seemed to grasp what Sarek had said, because he immediately turned for the door. "Spock!" Said Sarek, forcing sternness into his voice. "Be patient. You will see him soon." Spock managed to restrain himself, but the look he gave Sarek was downright sullen.

The turbolift ride was tense. Sarek had to refrain from touching his very tense son, lest he take it as some kind of challenge. In his current state of mind, he might forget all about the fact that Sarek was his father and perceive him as a rival male. The two Ferengi also seemed aware of the fact that they should not touch him. Finally, they arrived at the right floor. The hall resembled that of an apartment building, or a hotel with facilities for long term stays. They stopped before a door, and Barbo began to punch in a code. As he did that, Sarek pressed a button on the binders, unlocking them from Spock's wrists.

"Go on in." Barbo told him with a smirk. "He's all ready for you." Little did their clients or 'employee' know what was really going on.

The door opened and Spock rushed inside. Then it whooshed shut behind him.

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><p><strong>I know, I'm a terrible person, making you wait for the big moment. Mwaahaahaa!<strong> **Ahem, I mean, patience, good things come to those who wait!**

**I got the two Ferengi names and possibly Sarek's fake name from TNG and DS9. I think.**

**Again, if anyone can help me with my rude reviewer, I'd appreciate it!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here it is, the big moment! Put up early as a thank you to everyone who soothed my bruised ego. I mentioned before that this will contain somewhat dubious consent. I hope that warning was an appropriate one. This chapter will just be Jim's POV. Spock's a little busy right now!**

**This is pretty much all sex.**

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><p>Chapter 3<p>

Jim was lying on the bed, studying the rules of the 'business' for what seemed like the millionth time. He still didn't know what he could do to escape. It seemed that trips outside of the rooms or building were an earned privilege, as was possession of things (clothes, jewelry, etc) other than the ones provided by the people who'd bought him. He didn't even know what planet he was on. The biggest problem though, was the ankle cuff. He'd already been shocked by it once after attacking the Caitian, and that might have just been a low setting. As long as it was on him, there was no way he'd make it outside of the building. He looked at the clock on the table beside the bed and saw that it was nearly 3 a.m. He looked at the padd one more time. He really needed to get enough sleep if he was going to be able to plan or prepare for anything.

He was pulled from his musings by the sound of the door at the other end of the room opening. He caught a brief glimpse of a few people outside, at least two of them Ferengi, when a man in dark, nondescript clothing rushed in. The door shut right behind him. He looked around the room wildly for at first before his eyes caught Jim. For a moment, all his focus was on the man on the bed. Then, before Jim could even blink, the man was across the room, on top of him, and pressing him into the bed as he pulled at his uniform. The first thing Jim noted in the struggle was the guy's pointed ears. He frantically grabbed at his hands as he tried to figure out what was going on.

Was he a Romulan? His aggressive behavior was certainly typical of one. But as he stared up at the flushed green face above him, he noticed a distinct lack of ridges on his forehead. A _Vulcan_? Vulcans were supposed to be pacifists, people who were only interested in logic and science, and other factual stuff like that. However, all other possibilities flew out the window when the Vulcan managed to get a knee between his legs and pry them apart, and he felt something big and hard pressing against him.

"No!" He shouted. "Stop it! Get off me!" Then, to his great shock, the Vulcan went limp and practically collapsed against him and buried his face in his neck. He was shaking, and as Jim felt something wet against his neck, he realized the guy was crying as well.

"Please!" He gasped, his breath coming in shuddering sobs. "Please! I burn!" Jim's fear was now warring with confusion. The guy said he was burning? He was incredibly hot to the touch, even more so than he might expect for a Vulcan. Jim put his hands on his shoulders and pushed experimentally. He moved back, though rather reluctantly. Jim sat up and looked him in the eye.

"What do you mean, you burn?" He asked, trying to keep his voice steady. The Vulcan, who he saw was actually pretty young, shook under his hands.

"Pon Farr." He gasped. "Plak Tow. Blood fever. Must mate or die." The guy had to fuck someone or die? And why him? But that didn't really matter right now. If it was true, and the man was going to die if they didn't have sex, Jim's captors might decide to kill him too. And…Jim didn't know what it was exactly, but watching the man in front of him, shaking, crying, and begging to have sex with him, he didn't feel quite as threatened or afraid as he had when he first came in. His black hair was a wild mess and his teary brown eyes were nearly black with arousal and surrounded by green, meaning they were bloodshot. His face was also flushed green, and he couldn't have been more than a couple of years older than Jim. He made a decision.

"Look," he said, still struggling to keep his voice even and not let his fear show, "I don't know what's going on, but if you're gonna die otherwise, then I- I'll let you fuck me." He paused to take a steadying breath. "Just, please be careful. I've never done this with a guy before." The Vulcan seemed to process his words, then pitched forward against Jim, burying his face in his neck again, gasping words to him.

"Oh, thank you, _thank you_!" Jim didn't resist as the Vulcan lowered him back to the bed, staying plastered up against him the whole time. For a moment, they just laid there, Jim rigid against the pillows and the Vulcan pressed against him. His shaking had slowly subsided. Now, it was beginning to feel like he was _sniffing_ at Jim's neck. Then, he felt a hot tongue drag against his skin. Due to the feverish Vulcan's close proximity and his own nervousness, Jim had begun to sweat, and the Vulcan seemed intent on properly sampling it. Jim shuddered a little, and the Vulcan seemed to respond well to it, pressing closer and wrapping his arms around him.

After a few more seconds of licking (as well as some sucking and nibbling) he began to move down to Jim's chest. He actually growled when he encountered Jim's uniform and began trying to tear it off again. Jim grabbed his wrists again and pushed them back.

"Hang on!" He said quickly. "I'll take care of this, just worry about your own clothes." The Vulcan immediately pushed himself off the bed and began tearing off his long coat. Jim didn't watch him get undressed; he just focused on removing the wetsuit-like thing with his shaky hands. He heard what sounded like fabric tearing, and then the Vulcan was back on the bed, pressing him down again, flesh against flesh, and getting right back to where he'd left off. Jim froze in shock for a moment as he felt another man's body pressed right against his, the firm skin and lightly furred chest quite alien to him. The biggest shock of all was the feeling of a very hard, hot Vulcan cock pressed against his flaccid one. He snapped out of it when he felt the Vulcan mouthing at his neck again. "Wait." He whispered. The Vulcan raised his head again. He was starting to look a little irritated. But there was one more thing Jim felt he should ask. "What's your name?" The irritated expression vanished. The reply was soft.

"I am Spock."

"Spock." He repeated. "I'm Jim."

"_Jim_." Spock repeated. It was almost like a purr. Jim shuddered again. No one had ever said his name like that, like it was the best word ever. Spock said it like it was the answer to his prayers. Spock briefly raised himself up enough to press his nose into Jim's hair and took a deep sniff before he bent his head back to Jim's chest. He resumed licking, nipping, and sucking on bits of Jim's skin as he slowly made his way downward. To Jim's embarrassment, he couldn't help but feel a familiar stirring in his groin. He kept trying to tell himself he had nothing to be ashamed of, that he was attracted to men, that he was doing this to prevent a worse outcome, and that it was a perfectly natural reaction to have to that kind of touch. However, all attempts to soothe his wounded pride were made useless when Spock reached his pelvis.

As he had done with the hair on Jim's head, he placed his nose into the curls at his groin and inhaled deeply, and all Jim could think was that it should NOT have been as hot as it was. His semi-hard cock began to fill more rapidly as Spock turned his full attention to it. Jim was unable to prevent his hips from jerking, yelping a bit as Spock wrapped one very hot hand around it and gave the head a curious lick with that hot tongue.

He was then turned over onto his stomach by gentle but insistent hands. His hips were coaxed up a bit, and two of the pillows on the bed were placed under them as his legs spread and bent underneath him, effectively propping his rear up enough for Spock's convenience, as he knelt behind him. He grabbed another pillow and clutched to his chest, ready to use it to muffle any undignified sounds. He froze suddenly as he felt those same hands spreading him, the tip of one finger running across his anus.

"Hold on." He said a little breathlessly. "There's some stuff we can use in the bathroom-" he was cut off by the feeling of the finger returning, this time coated in something slick. He felt it circling his hole once before slowly pushing in. He tried to force himself to relax and not clench around the unfamiliar feeling. He tried to focus instead on the groan Spock let out as he pushed the finger in. He'd heard somewhere once that Vulcan's hands and fingers were very sensitive; something to do with their mind melds. The finger slid in and out of him for a minute, and he started to get used to the strange sensation. Then, the finger was removed. He took the opportunity to lift his head and glance back.

Spock seemed to have his hand, the one that wasn't resting rather possessively on Jim's hip, down at his groin. Jim saw him bring it back up and saw the fingers glistening with the same fluid. He realized that Spock's body was providing a natural lubrication. Jim might have laughed a bit at that if he wasn't preoccupied with other things. He turned back to rest his head on the pillow again as he felt two fingers now working their way into him. Spock moaned again as his fingers were massaged by the virgin hole. Jim let out a moan of his own, as a slight burning sensation accompanied the fingers. The burn intensified as Spock began to scissor the two fingers slowly. This continued on for a minute or so. The fingers were removed to retrieve more lubricant, and three returned covered in it. Jim pushed his face into the pillow to muffle the whine he let out as the three fingers began to scissor like before. Spock seemed to notice his discomfort and rubbed at his hip in what seemed like an attempt at comfort. He added a fourth finger, slowly preparing him for his own needy cock. Finally, he removed his fingers with a small, desperate moan at the loss of the tightness that had surrounded them.

Jim felt Spock shifting behind him, moving into position, and he couldn't stop himself from looking back again. He wanted to see just what he was about to get into, or rather what was about to get into him. His eyes widened as he actually saw Spock's dick. Jim knew he had nothing to be ashamed of, not that anyone would be able to tell now; his erection had gone down during the preparations. Spock looked like he might be close to eleven inches long. He was a bit more slender that Jim was, noticeably so. He was kind of relieved to see that. He had a feeling that girth might prove more of a difficulty than length in this situation. What really captured his attention, though, was the head. It was double ridged and a very dark shade of green. His heart stuttered a bit as he watched Spock pumping himself slowly, spreading the lubrication around, preparing to penetrate him.

Jim turned back to the pillow once more and wrapped his arms around it. He felt the hot, double ridged head resting against his hole for a moment, and then pushing in. He had to bite down on the pillow to muffle his groan at the entry. He was thankful for the two pillows keeping him propped up, because he didn't think he'd be able to remain that way on his own. The burn caused by the stretch was worse than when it had just been the fingers, but not nearly as bad as it would have been without them. Maybe it just seemed that way because Spock was so hot to the touch. Jim just clutched at the pillow and did his best not to move around or try to throw Spock off, trying to ignore the burn and focus on the pure _heat_ easing inside him. Spock gripped his hips hard, and he knew he'd have handprint shaped bruises later on. He kept up a slow slide inward, groaning as he did so, until he was flush against Jim's backside.

Just as he stopped, Jim felt a sudden burst of heat deep inside him and heard Spock's deep moan. He realized that Spock must have come. However, the cock inside him did not seem to change at all. Spock stayed still, pressed right against him, though Jim didn't know if he was giving him time to adjust to his cock, or just gathering his strength again. He decided to test the waters a bit.

He wriggled his hips slightly while simultaneously clenching himself around Spock's hard length. Spock gasped and began to rock against him, just small thrusts barely in and out. After a minute or so, he stilled again, Jim felt that telltale burst of heat inside him once more. Was that what this fever did to him? Gave him multiple orgasms with little stimulation? He was shaken out of his thoughts as Spock began to move once more, his thrusts longer now. The semen from the other two orgasms was really helping to reduce the friction as he thrust in and out. He adjusted his position a bit, and Jim suddenly cried out as Spock's cock struck what could only be his prostate.

"Ah, fuck!" Jim had never tried to find it himself. He knew there was a reason guys liked to do this, but he'd had no idea it would feel like that! Spock seemed to take this as a good sign, and continued to aim for that spot, managing to hit it most of the time. Jim's cock was beginning to fill again, and he didn't bother to repress his moans or encouragement anymore. "Oh God, right there! Harder!"

Spock did exactly as he asked, pulling him up to his hands and knees and pumping in and out of him in long, hard strokes, finding that spot over and over again. All the while he grunted and growled words in Vulcan. Jim caught his name mentioned here and there. _"Jim, ni rom, ni wulfic. Samu t'nash'veh yontaya! Nem-tor t'nash-veh sa-nei-masu! Ah, Jim!" _Jim was now painfully hard himself. He began to reach for his cock, desperate for some relief, but was stopped when Spock grabbed his hand and pressed it against the bed. He did the same with the other hand and rubbed their fingers together hard. Jim gasped as he felt sparks of pleasure running from his fingertips to the rest of his body. He began thrusting his own hips back to prolong contact.

"God, please!" He moaned, not even caring what he was begging for. Spock seemed thrilled to hear it. He growled, placed his hands on Jim's hips again, and held him in place as he began pounding into Jim hard and fast, fingers digging into his flesh. Jim was in awe of his strength and could only hang on for the ride and cry out his pleasure. Even if he had experimented by himself, nothing could have prepared him for the burning heat and slick friction and pleasure radiating from the inside out while Spock fucked him. He was so focused on being so filled by that heat and friction that he almost didn't notice his own orgasm approach until it was happening. He arched his back and came with a shout as he ejaculated all over the pillows below him. He slumped back over them as Spock continued to labor toward his own satisfaction. He continued to pound into Jim, molding himself to his back, pressing him hard into the mattress, biting down on his shoulder, and shoving in as far as he could as he came a third time.

This time, he pulled out afterwards. Jim winced as he pulled free, feeling the hot fluid seeping out of him. He felt himself starting to drift off, but struggled to remain awake as he felt Spock pulling the pillows out from under him and throwing them to the floor as he turned Jim onto his back and settled between his legs again. He gazed up at the Vulcan staring down at him. The expression on his face was something that almost looked like…adoration. He touched his cheek lightly. _"E'tum."_ He murmured breathlessly. _"T'nash-veh e'tum kantelau." _Jim glanced down to see that Spock was still quite hard. Slowly, he lifted Jim's hips and slid easily back inside him. Jim hissed a bit at the contact with his rather sore opening. Spock didn't move, he just stayed there, pressed right up against him. He raised a hand to Jim's face again and began arranging his fingers, settling them at certain points. Before Jim could really figure out what he was trying to do, he spoke some words in Vulcan and the world around him disappeared.

Jim found himself in a place where he had no body or voice. It was just him. At first, there was nothing except this odd sense of nothingness. Then, he became aware of the fact that he was not alone. He wasn't sure how he knew that, he just did. He realized it was Spock, in his head. There weren't any real words between them. He felt feelings passing between them as they came closer together. From Spock, he felt very warring emotions: Guilt, comfort, concern, gratitude, relief, fear, even happiness. Without even thinking about it, he found himself trying to push aside his own fear and project comfort back to Spock.

His presence came closer and closer, until they were one in mind. Then, things began to take shape around him. He found himself in a place that seemed a mix of things both familiar and unfamiliar. Everything around him seemed to be a flow of images. Some provoked familiarity, both good and bad. Others were completely alien to him.

As these images flashed before him, he became aware of what was going on back in the physical world. He was only mildly aware of the fact that Spock's body was now mindlessly fucking his, roughly and without restraint, his own body just laying there. He was aware of the fact that his mouth was crying out, though he couldn't tell if it was pain or pleasure, and the fact that Spock's fingers were still latched onto his face like they were glued there. It seemed that he would orgasm, rest for a few moments, and then continue fucking in a cycle. Spock seemed to notice his awareness of discomfort and suddenly, Jim felt the immense pleasure and relief that Spock was feeling as he slaked his lust on Jim's body. He knew he should have been shocked by the way Spock was able to control what he felt, but he was too distracted by the euphoric rush it was giving him.

He had no idea how long they stayed that way, he was so lost in the sensations he felt. He wasn't prepared when the connection suddenly broke, and he found himself back in his own body, Spock still inside him, his own cock half hard. The mess between them indicated that he had ejaculated at least once or twice while their minds were joined. He looked up at Spock, who was staring down at him, almost in awe. Very slowly, he began to move again.

Jim almost tried to pull away, incredibly sore from what had gone on while their minds were fused together. But Spock found his prostate once again, and his cock continued to harden. He resigned himself to it. Spock began to thrust faster and harder, grunting as he did so. Jim also began to gasp and groan as his own pleasure mounted once more. He summoned the energy to wrap his legs around Spock's hips and grasp at his shoulders with his hands, moving his hips in time with the thrusting. As he sped up, Spock lowered himself so that they were pressed almost completely against each other, fisting the sheets on either side of Jim's head as he stared down at him. Their eyes remained locked until Jim's squeezed shut as he came a final time with a weak cry from his hoarse throat, his arms and legs falling back to the bed. Spock followed shortly after with a growl that he muffled in the juncture of Jim's neck and shoulder.

For a moment they just lay there, shuddering through the aftershocks. Then, Spock slowly pulled slightly back. The shift in position alerted Jim to the fact that Spock's cock was finally soft inside him. His temperature was already dropping, though he was still unusually warm to the touch. Jim managed to turn his head to look at the bedside clock. He realized with a start that it was now after 5 p.m., that it had been over sixteen hours since Spock had come into the room. The mind meld (for that's what it must have been) had made him lose awareness of the passing time.

His gaze was directed back to Spock by a hand on the back of his head. Spock was just hovering there, looking somewhat uncertain. Then, very slowly, he began to close the distance between them. He paused just a scant inch away from Jim's face, and then finished his descent, touching their lips together lightly. Jim, not even thinking about it, closed his eyes and used the last bit of energy he had left to bring his right hand up to cup Spock's cheek and return the light pressure of his lips. He opened his eyes again as Spock pulled back, his cock slipping free as he did so, and moved to lie on his side. He pulled Jim so that he was also lying on his side, pressed against him with his head tucked under his chin, and wrapped his arms around him. He also hooked one of his legs over Jim's, effectively securing him in place. _"Yuk-tor."_ He mumbled sleepily. _"Yuk-tor, Jim."_

Jim struggled to stay awake, wondering if he should maybe pull away or something, aware of what a mess he was, semen still leaking from his sore hole, and uncertain as to why his 'customer' was so interested in cuddling. But then, Spock began running one hand through his sweaty hair and the other up and down his back. The warmth of the body pressed against his and the soothing motions against his skin dragged him under, and he drifted off to sleep.

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><p><strong>I kind of got my inspiration for the whole begging part from two stories on the KS Archive: kyliselle's **_**How High the Moon**_**, where rejection by one bondmate has severe consequences for the other, as well as CMM's **_**Virgin Sacrifice**_**, where Vulcans are supposed to not be able to rape someone because they need their partner's mental consent (I highly recommend them both, by the way). I figured it wouldn't be too strange for Spock to be unable to continue without Jim being willing, what with the whole telepathic element. That, plus the fact that I just don't I have it in me to write a rape scene. I originally meant to have more happen in this chapter, but this part lasted longer than I expected.**

**I got my Vulcan words from the Vulcan Language Database. I didn't see anything about grammar in there, so I just guessed. Also, I had to use some words that weren't entirely accurate, like burn instead of burning. If anyone knows how it should actually be, I'd appreciate a message so I try to make it right. This is what it's meant to mean:**

"_**So good, so tight. Cool my burning! Take my seed!" **_**(It was actually semen, but it seems to contain the word for seed.)**

"_**Beautiful. My beautiful mate."**_

"_**Sleep. Sleep Jim."**_

**So, this was my first ever sex scene. Like it? Hate it? Should I never try it again? Please review and tell me!**

**After this, I will definitely be going back to once a week updates, otherwise the whole story will come out forced and hurried like Forty Week Window did!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Up a day early because I honestly don't know when I'll be able to update again. Work has become long and irregular, with lots of twelve-hour shifts in the near future, leaving me with little time to eat and sleep, never mind typing! I will try to keep updating, but like I said, it may not happen right away. Sorry!**

**On a separate note, someone asked me about the stories I referenced and recommended in the last chapter. They are not here. They are located on a site called the KS Archive. Just type in the titles in the search engine and you should find them. Or the author's names, anything written by either of them is worth a read.**

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><p>Chapter 4<p>

Jim awoke disoriented and incredibly sore. He felt like he had as a teenager after spending long summer days doing odd jobs for the owners of neighboring farms. Though, he thought as he shifted onto his other side, farm labor had never made him sore down there-.

He snapped awake and took in his surroundings. Everything came flooding back to him. The Vulcan lying behind him had begged to be allowed to fuck him, and he had given his consent. It had led to what could only be described as the most intense sexual experience of his life. For a moment, he began to relax against the warm, lean body behind him, before the rest came back to him.

Regardless of how careful, sensual, and incredibly pleasurable it had been, it didn't change the fact that the man behind him had paid the people keeping him here to be able to have sex with him. Then again, he'd stopped when Jim resisted him, and, if what he'd said about Pon Farr or whatever it was had been true, he'd pretty much been begging for his life.

Jim shook his head a bit trying to dispel the conflicting thoughts. He was tired, sore, thirsty, and covered in bruises, dried sweat, and semen that belonged to both him and the other guy asleep on the bed. The arms around him were loose now, and he managed to slip out of them without incident. He winced as he slowly sat up, putting weight on his sore bottom. He made to stand up from the bed, and his legs gave way, sending him to the floor. The impact didn't hurt much, but he couldn't seem to get back up. His arms and legs were very sore from bracing against the bed. He was forced to crawl his way over to the bathroom door which, fortunately for him, was already open from his last use. The soreness of his body was almost enough to distract him from a strange sensation in his head, but not quite. It didn't feel bad really, but it didn't exactly feel good either. It was almost like a buzzing sensation. He ignored it in favor of focusing on his current need to clean himself off.

He got inside and reached the shower/bathtub and managed lift himself inside with shaking arms. He managed to settle himself inside comfortably enough, then realized he'd put himself opposite of the tap. He reached for it with one aching arm, but was unable to lean forward enough without significant pain. He was about to attempt it once more, when a soft voice right next to him made him freeze.

"Allow me to help."

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><p>Spock awoke to the sound of a dull thump. He noticed vaguely that it had come from the floor beside the bed. Then he realized three things that caused him to pry his eyes open. First, that he was no longer burning from the inside out, second, that the young man who'd assisted him through his Time was no longer there beside him, in his arms, and third, he was extremely aware of the second fact due to a brand new link between their two minds. As he glanced around quickly, he saw that the man (<em>Jim<em>, he reminded himself) was on the floor, crawling over to an open door nearby. Apparently he was so focused on it that he didn't notice that Spock had been woken by his movement.

He felt a stab of remorse go through his body. He'd been too rough with the human. Prostitute or not, he did not deserve to be in pain now just because Spock's father had paid for his compliance. Even though he had been apprised of the situation, he'd still been very alarmed at first by Spock's excitement, consenting only once Spock had been reduced to tears. He debated whether or not to follow him into the bathroom. He knew he was covered in dried fluids from their activities, and now that he was in complete possession of his faculties again, he rather wanted to clean himself. However, Jim might wish to be alone after his experience.

In the end, Spock's mind was made up the increasing sense of distress that hummed from the connection he'd inadvertently formed between them. It buzzed unpleasantly in his mind, growing with the increasing distance Jim put between them.

As he stood up, he wondered if Jim was also experiencing difficulty because of the link. He scooted to the edge of the bed and stood up, stumbling a bit as his legs took his weight for the first time in…twenty-three hours, according to the clock by the bed. He wasn't sure how much of that time had been spent mating and how much was spent sleeping. Melds, especially ones where one or both partners had little past experience, had a tendency to result in lost time.

He managed to adjust quickly enough. He already felt better than he had in days. He was hungry now, and thirsty. He had not been able to eat or drink much in the past few days, taking only bits of what his father and Healer Fer'at attempted to convince him to eat. He moved over to the door, looking inside. What he saw was a bathroom, and Jim was settling himself in the tub. He wondered if he should simply wait here, out of sight, when he saw Jim reaching for the water controls, his face scrunched up in pain. Another flash of guilt stabbed through him, and he made up his mind. He walked in and, unnoticed by Jim, knelt down next to the tub.

"Allow me to help." Jim started, turning toward him and wincing, his startling blue eyes shutting briefly. It seemed like every move he made was causing him some amount of pain. Spock could understand why; he'd left marks all over him. There was no broken skin, but there was a significant amount of bruising marring the lightly tanned skin, especially around the hips. Spock almost visibly winced as he realized how tightly he must have gripped them in his eagerness. He also felt a wave of shame when he saw the teeth marks standing out on the skin at the juncture of Jim's neck and shoulder, as well as the fingerprint bruises mapping the meld points on his face. He was shaken out of his guilt ridden thoughts as Jim spoke, his voice raspy.

"Okay." Spock nodded, and reached for the tap. He turned it to a warm temperature, but not so warm that it would aggravate Jim's bruises. He saw Jim beginning to relax, so he looked around the room, searching out anything that might help him make the human more comfortable. There was a cup sitting on the sink counter. He stood up and picked it up, filling it with cool water from the sink's faucet. He knelt down again and handed it to Jim. He took it, his hands a little shaky, and took sips until the cup was half empty. "Thanks." He whispered. He held the cup out to Spock. "You want some? Spock actually felt a lump rising in his throat. The young man before him was tired and in pain, and he was still trying to accommodate Spock's needs. He took the cup, hoping Jim wouldn't be able to tell what affect the gesture was having on him.

"Thank you." He said quietly, taking only a few sips from it. He set the cup back on the edge of the sink, in case Jim wanted it again. He looked around the room again, and spotted a small closet. He opened it and found some washcloths and other things. He returned to Jim's side and found a bottle of liquid soap on the tub by the wall. The tub was halfway full by then, so he shut off the water. He then quickly lathered up the cloth and, going slowly so as not alarm Jim, he began wiping at his abdominal area, removing the remnants of their coupling from his skin. He reached lower to Jim's pelvic area, and felt him tense minutely. He pulled back, moving over to start wiping the cloth across his shoulders and working his way downward, not going any further than the small of his back. He felt the tense muscles begin to relax under his hands, and the sense of nervousness he was feeling from the other man began to abate. Jim was still exhausted, he realized, and fighting to stay awake. He quickly rinsed out the washcloth and began removing the soap from Jim's skin. Then he moved back, setting the cloth aside. Jim looked at him, questioningly, the wariness in his eyes somewhat lessened. "You are still very fatigued." He said quietly. "Perhaps you should wait until you have rested more before you attempt to bathe yourself more thoroughly." Jim nodded slowly, and Spock reached down to pull the plug to let the water out.

"I guess you're right." He seemed to hesitate. "Would you mind- there's some robes in the closet there." He paused. "Unless, you still want…" he trailed off.

"No." Said Spock. Jim flinched a bit, and he realized how sharp he'd sounded. He couldn't really help it. Jim seemed to be dreading the possibility that he might want to mate with him again. Even if he was just a temporary mate, it bothered Spock to think he'd traumatized him so much that he would not accept his touch again. Such a thing was a great shame for a Vulcan male. He softened his tone. "You have already done more than enough." He stood and went back to the closet.

As he reached for a robe, he abruptly became very aware of the fact that he too was still completely nude. In his concern for Jim, he'd completely forgotten. Or perhaps it was simply the contentment of being so near his mate that had caused his lack of awareness. He quickly pulled the first robe on, then pulled out a second, along with a large towel. He set them both on the sink counter and held his hands out to Jim. He hesitated before taking them, struggling a bit as Spock helped him to his feet and out of the tub. He gently maneuvered him so that he could sit on the closed toilet seat and handed him the towel.

Jim mumbled his thanks again and began drying himself off. He almost seemed to be in a daze. Once he was dry enough, Spock gently removed the towel and assisted him in putting on the robe, wincing internally as Jim's face showed his pain while strained to maneuver his arms into the sleeves and pulled the knee-length robe around himself as much as he could while seated. As Jim closed the robe, Spock hesitated briefly before kneeling before him and taking both his hands again. Jim looked at him, startled.

"Jim," he said quietly, "I am alive and well because of you. There is nothing I can do to repay what you have done for me. However, I wish to try. I am a member of one of the oldest and most powerful clans on Vulcan. Ask anything you wish of me. If it is within my power to give you what you wish, I will." Jim stared at him, almost uncomprehendingly. Then, his head dropped down. Spock waited for him to say something, anything. He raised his head again, and Spock was alarmed to see tears shining in his blue eyes.

"Please," he whispered as they began to fall, "please get me out of here." He hunched over, his shoulders shaking and his breath hitching as he cried. Spock was very worried now. Even more upsetting than the sight of Jim in tears before him was the anguish and fear he felt pouring from the link between them. Not knowing what else he could do, he released Jim's hands, stood, and gently lifted him up, bridle style, and carried him out of the bathroom to the bed. Setting him down, but keeping one supporting arm around his waist, he pulled back the covers on the bed. The comforter, due to their earlier…activities, was quite soiled, but it was mostly on the surface and the sheets underneath were clean and dry. As he placed Jim flat on the bed and pulled up the comforter and sheet, he realized that Jim had one fist clenched in the sleeve of his robe. He was still shaking with silent tears. Spock thought of what his mother would do in such a situation.

"Hush." He said gently, stroking his free hand through Jim's hair. "Rest now. Everything will be fine when you wake." Jim stared up at him, his eyelids beginning to droop as exhaustion won out. Finally, they shut, and his breathing evened out, signaling sleep. Spock gently removed his hand from the sleeve of his robe. He then sat down at the edge of the bed and studied the young man.

Why had he asked for help leaving? Had he perhaps been forced to turn to prostitution as a last resort, a way to make ends meet? Perhaps he wanted money, enough to start a new life. His reaction though, his tears, made it all seem more complicated and serious than that. Spock considered something.

The link they now shared would make it incredibly easy for him to meld with Jim while he was unconscious and see just how serious the situation was. However, he would be violating the other man's privacy in the worst possible way known to his people. Was it worth adding to his already great offense to find out what was going on? He remembered the tears in Jim's eyes. Perhaps it was the link that caused it, but he desperately wanted to know the cause of Jim's grief. He matched his fingers to Jim's meld points, closed his eyes, and dove in, momentarily reveling in the contact with the incredibly compatible mind, searching for memories specifically connected to his request. Moments later, his eyes snapped open and he jerked back in horror.

He immediately walked over to where his clothes lay on the floor. He went through the pockets of his slightly ripped tunic. He was almost certain he'd felt…there! He pulled out the comm unit that his father had slipped into his pocket, probably so that he could tell him when he was ready to leave, and they could make a discreet exit. He immediately opened it and placed a call. Sarek answered immediately.

"Spock?"

"Yes, Father." He replied. "Can you speak freely?" He couldn't tell Sarek what he knew if he wasn't alone.

"Of course." Said Sarek, understanding what he meant. "I did not expect to hear from you so soon. I take it that you are well?"

"Indeed." Said Spock. "My human blood may have had an unforeseen effect on this part of my life after all."

"Yes," agreed Sarek, "however I requested three days. You have been in the room for less than twenty-four hours. Shall I tell the managers that you will not need the remaining forty-eight?"

"I believe you should use that time to formulate a plan for removing Jim from this place, for I cannot leave without him." There was a long pause before Sarek spoke again.

"Spock," he said in a surprisingly gentle voice, "I understand that engaging in such an intimate act may lead to certain emotional impulses, but you do not know this young man. He is involved in a profession that our people would find most distasteful, and whatever you feel you shared with him, to him what has happened between the two of you is simply part of his business. Whatever connection that may have been forged between your minds can be broken from afar by Healer Fer'at."

"I melded with him, just moments ago." Said Spock quietly. "He is not here of his own free will."

"Are you certain of this?" Asked Sarek.

"I am." He replied. "He was traveling on a private merchant ship that was raided by Ferengi pirates. They abducted him and sold him to this establishment. I am the first 'client' they have sent to him." He paused here. _I am also the first male he had ever been sexually intimate with_, he thought, though he didn't say it aloud. He refocused on the issue of Jim's captivity. "He is wearing an ankle cuff that delivers a painful electric shock to his system if he is disobedient. He in no way chose to be here, doing this. And it is very possible that many others did not either."

"This is quite serious." Said Sarek gravely. "I will see what I can do. Should I involve the authorities, I will make sure to leave our names out of it."

"Do not attempt to spare my reputation." Said Spock sharply. "You may tell everyone that I came here alone if you wish, but I will not allow pride and fear of what my fellow Vulcans think affect any sentient beings chance at freedom from sexual slavery."

"I understand." Replied Sarek, having the decency to sound apologetic. "I am currently in the office we first met the two managers in. I will see what I can do. For now, you will have to remain in that room with your companion."

"His name is Jim." Interjected Spock, rather tersely.

"Jim." Sarek conceded. "You will have to remain with him, perhaps for the duration of the time we have paid for. If we need more time, I shall tell them as much. I will just not mention what we need more time for. Will you be alright staying with him?"

"I believe so." Replied Spock. "He was considerably calm when I first tried to explain my condition to him. I believe he will be able to move past any emotional discomfort." There was a pause before Sarek responded.

"Good." He said. "I will contact you again when I have more information."

"Understood." Replied Spock, breaking the connection. He began picking up his clothing to fold it and place it somewhere out of the way, when he felt something thump against him. He reached into another pocket and pulled out a small handheld object. It was a dermal mender, used for healing superficial injuries such as bruises and cuts. Apparently his father had considered the possibility that he or his partner would need it. Spock ignored his embarrassment over the fact that his father had planned for the aftereffects of his first sexual experience in favor of gratitude for his foresight. He placed it and the comm on top of his folded clothing on the countertop. He would offer it to Jim when he woke again.

He then returned to the bathroom, took off the robe, and began wiping himself off with the same cloth he'd used on Jim, rinsing it out thoroughly in the sink first. Once he was finished, he put the robe back on and left the bathroom, feeling oddly bereft. He looked at Jim on the bed. He saw that he was shivering a bit. For the first time, he noticed that the room was rather chilly, even by human standards. He hesitated. Were they actual bondmates, he would have immediately crawled under the covers with Jim, to hold him close and share warmth with him.

Jim had seemed to understand the urgency of his situation. It was one of the reasons that he had allowed Spock to mate with him, in spite of his apprehension. Perhaps he would demonstrate understanding about this as well. The only thing Spock could really focus on, though, was that he didn't like seeing him shivering there like that. He could also feel the link urging him to be closer to his mate. He gave in and approached the bed, pulling back the comforter to let himself in. He moved as close as close to Jim as he dared and reached out a hand to touch his hair again. To his surprise, Jim turned into his embrace and his shivering abated. He allowed himself a slight quirk of the lips, then leaned his head down closer to Jim's so that his cheek was pressed against that soft hair, wrapping his arms around him securely, and waited for sleep again, hoping he would wake to good news from his father regarding this strange and unfortunate situation. For now, he felt oddly content to lie here, feeling Jim's body relaxed against his, listening to his steady breathing as he allowed himself to drift off.

* * *

><p><strong>I know this was mostly Spock, but it just happened that way. It was also to make up for the fact that it was all Jim last time. Again, sorry about whatever may happen, but work has to come first!<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**I know seven days isn't until tomorrow, but I just got paid and I'm feeling generous!**

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><p>Chapter 5<p>

Sarek of Vulcan was angry. He wouldn't have bothered to conceal it from Surak himself. Because not even Surak would fault him for it, not after what he had just learned. After speaking with his son, he'd gone over to the monitor in the room. He saw that it was possible to watch what was going on in front of other cameras, and that with the right programming, he could access the recorded footage from yesterday. He'd decided to see if he could find footage of the two managers they'd met with yesterday, after they'd left to confer in the hallway. He'd been successful.

Afterward, he was practically shaking with rage over what he'd found. From the two Ferengi's conversation, he'd learned that rather than just being overcharged for the services of a particular employee, he'd unknowingly been paying them to use his fever stricken son for the purpose of raping their unwilling acquisition into submission. Not even the most prominent masters of the Kohlinar rite would be able to ignore such a grave offense.

What was going on here was an atrocity, and not just because of the fact that his son had been involved. There were people here being forced to service others with absolutely no benefit to themselves unless they gave in and accepted their fate. And how many of them were Federation citizens? The only way to know would be to alert the authorities, and he still wanted to see if he could find some way to keep Spock from being involved in any investigation.

There were a couple of other things he needed think about as well. Spock had been perfectly lucid when they'd spoken to each other. That could only mean that he'd mated with the man whose time he'd been paying for. After an incident with another customer, the Ferengi had seemed certain that he would be resistant to others, but if he had, Spock would not have been able to mate with him and would have died. The only explanation was that the young man had consented to the act, whatever the reason might have been. From what Spock had told him, it sounded like he'd consented because Spock was able to verbally communicate his dilemma, and speech was supposed to be impossible for a male Vulcan from once he entered the Plak Tow until after it abated. Perhaps it was Spock's human biology that allowed him to ask the young man for help?

Said young man was another point of interest for Sarek. Spock had called him Jim, and the two Ferengi had told them his name was James. In the hallway however, they'd referred to him as Kirk. James Kirk. It was a disturbingly familiar name. It was the name of the younger son of George Kirk, the Starfleet captain who'd been promoted during battle and then died protecting that very son as a newborn from rogue Romulans. If the son of such a famed hero were to accuse his son of something as shameful as rape, it could easily destroy his life. Hopefully, if he could orchestrate Kirk's successful rescue, he would be grateful enough to keep any and all details of their encounter to himself.

He pulled out his second comm unit, the one intended for longer range communication, and contacted Stonn. He answered immediately.

"Ambassador? I trust all is well?" He could hear the unasked question in his voice; is Spock alright?

"There has been a complication." He said tersely. "Spock is well, but it seems at least one of the employees here is a Federation member who was abducted and brought here against his will. We must find some way to inform the authorities of the situation without alerting the establishment owners to the fact that we have discovered their secret. Where are you now?"

"I am in my quarters." Replied Stonn, remaining calm and professional.

"You must use your computer terminal to ascertain the location of the nearest Federation ship." Instructed Sarek. "Then you must put me in contact with its Captain."

"Right away, Sir." There was a lengthy pause as Stonn began searching out the nearest ship that could help them. Ten minutes later, he had an answer. "The nearest ship is approximately nine hours away from your location. It is a Starfleet vessel, the _USS Lincoln_, and it is captained by Christopher Pike." Had Sarek been human, he would have likely been thanking his lucky stars right now.

"Begin establishing contact between us now." He instructed. "Tell him that I must speak to him immediately about a very serious matter."

"Yes Sir." Stonn once again signed off briefly to do as Sarek asked. Sarek knew he was likely getting the best person for the job. He had met Captain Pike at a few diplomatic events in the past, and he was a very respectful man, quite understanding of Vulcan's sometimes aloof attitude and preference for solitude. Also, he'd attended Starfleet Academy as a classmate of George Kirk briefly, an underclassman. He was a great admirer of his and would likely jump at the chance to help the man's son.

All that was left to do was make Pike aware of the situation. Hopefully he would once again demonstrate his acceptance of Vulcan secretiveness and be discreet about his and Spock's presence there. Then he would have to contact Spock to tell him what he'd learned, and try to work out some way to make sure he was able to leave the facility with his reputation intact. For now, he sat back and waited for Stonn to get back to him with a confirmation of an audience with Pike.

* * *

><p>Spock was roused from his sleep by the sound of his comm ringing softly. He gently removed himself from Jim's grasp and got up from the bed. A quick glance at the clock told him it had been three hours, less time than he'd expected, since he had contacted Sarek. He hoped it was good news. He picked up the comm and answered it.<p>

"Father?"

"Spock," said Sarek, sounding unusually tense, "I have discovered evidence confirming what you have told me." Spock tensed himself.

"You have evidence that Jim has been brought here unlawfully?"

"Indeed," replied Sarek, "as well as many others." Spock started to reply when his gaze was drawn back to the bed. Jim had shifted over to the spot where he'd been laying, seeking the warmth remaining on the sheets. Spock couldn't help but find the sight…endearing. Pulling his eyes away, he returned to the conversation.

"I saw in Jim's mind that he was not to receive any customers for another week. Do you know why the managers sent me to him?" There was a pause before Sarek answered, and when he did, he spoke rather slowly.

"They are two of five co-managers. They wished to gain a financial edge over their partners by accepting our request secretly. No one would have known that he was selected for the job, as he was still recovering from injuries he received during his capture. Also," Sarek hesitated again, "he had given them some trouble already with non-compliance. They thought that being forced to assist a Vulcan through his Time would temper him. Or, if that did not work, they thought that if he refused to cooperate again, they would be able to lie and say that they would give him to another Vulcan in need of the same services if he continued to resist their demands." Spock did not reply immediately. It was fortunate that the comm unit was of Vulcan manufacture, or his grip might have crushed it. The fact that Jim had been so alarmed by his entry made a great deal of sense now. He'd had no idea that he was expected to service Spock. He forced himself to take a few deep breaths before he spoke again.

"What measures can be taken to ensure his, and the others release?"

"I have already made contact with Captain Christopher Pike. His ship, the _Lincoln_, will reach orbit in approximately seven hours. We are working out a plan to get the managers to incriminate themselves. For now, you must remain in the room with your companion until I come to let you out. Do you understand?"

"Of course, Father." Replied Spock. It would give him the opportunity to tell Jim what had occurred, assuming he woke up in time.

"Very good." Said Sarek. "I will contact you again so that you may prepare to leave."

"Understood." Said Spock, signing off. He placed the comm unit back on top of his folded clothing and turned back to the bed…only to find a pair of very blue, slightly bloodshot eyes staring at him.

* * *

><p>Jim found himself drifting in and out of consciousness, much like the way he did when he was sick or hung over, or just completely exhausted. He could have sworn he heard two people talking, but he couldn't really process what they were saying to each other. Then, once again, the events of a few hours ago came rushing back to him. He'd woken up in bed with his 'client' and made his way to the bathroom. Then, the man who'd paid for his body had followed him in and offered assistance. After helping him clean up a bit, the man had offered to try to repay him personally for his service, and he'd broken down. All the helplessness and fear that he'd been holding back for the past week had already been so close to the surface. Having the man who'd paid to have sex with him treat him with more dignity and respect than anyone else he'd met here just put him over the edge. He'd begged the man for help and then he'd <em>cried<em>, something he hadn't done since he was a little kid. And in response to his breakdown, the Vulcan had tucked back into bed.

His eyelids felt extremely heavy, but he managed to pry them open. He saw the Vulcan, Spock, placing what looked like a personal comm unit on top of his folded clothing. Then, he turned and their eyes locked. For a moment, they just watched each other. Then Spock spoke up.

"You are awake." Jim nodded.

"Yeah." His voice was still rather raspy. He started to sit up, and at the same time, Spock started to move toward him. They both froze, and Jim was shocked to see that Spock had an almost wary look in his eyes. He began to move forward again, slowly, like someone trying not to spook a frightened animal. He came to the end of the bed and slowly sat down.

"Jim," he said quietly, "do you recall asking me to help you leave this place?" Jim felt his face slowly flush.

"Yeah, I do." Spock looked away for a moment, before meeting his eyes again with what appeared to be a little reluctance.

"I am aware of what a massive violation of privacy it is, but I searched your thoughts while you slept. I wished to know why you were so upset. I saw how you came to be here, and I contacted my father. He is currently working to arrange your release." Jim was too shocked to speak at first. He was being rescued.

"How?" He managed to ask. Spock shifted uncomfortably.

"My father contacted the nearest starship in range. He explained that this facility is holding Federation members against their will and is working to arrange a plan to expose the establishment for what it really is. Captain Pike and his ship will be here in seven hours." He must have seen the surprise on Jim's face, because he asked him about it. "Are you familiar with him?"

"Yeah, I know him." Pike had known his dad back in the Academy, having taken a strategy class he'd helped out with right after his graduation. He'd been a big admirer of his career, even more so after the Kelvin incident, which he wrote his dissertation on. He'd met him once as a kid at some function his family had been invited to. He had suggested that a son of George Kirk would be a welcome addition to the Academy someday. Jim had rather rudely brushed him off. But, he'd only been twelve at the time. Now, Pike was on his way to rescue him from this place, because of Spock had apparently made good on his offer. "How long did you say?"

"Seven hours." Spock repeated. "We will both have to remain in this room until the ship arrives. I do not know how long it will take them to bring the authorities down on the managers, but once they do, you will be free to go." He seemed to hesitate once more, shifting so that he was much closer to Jim, who tried to sit up a little straighter. The look he was giving Jim could almost be read as…imploring. He reached out, as if to touch him, but seemed to think better of it and put his hand back down. "Jim, you must believe me. If I had known that you were here unwillingly, I would not have-," he cut off momentarily, "I cannot say I would not have attempted to mate with you, given my state, but I would not have expected you to do it because you were paid for it. Or," he amended, "because the managers of the establishment were paid for it. This choice should not have been forced on you."

Jim barely heard him. All he could focus on was the fact that he was being rescued, because of the very nervous and sincere Vulcan sitting in front of him. Without thinking he pitched forward, barely registering the ache still present in most of his body, or the fact that Spock's arms automatically came up to surround him as he crashed against him.

"Oh my God, thank you so much!" He felt tears welling up in his eyes again, but he forced them back. He clutched at the man like he was his lifeline, not unlike the way Spock had held on to him the day before. "Whatever I can do to pay you back for this, I'll do it! I swear!" Spock stiffened a bit and pulled back from the frantic embrace.

"You should never have been brought here. And I am already indebted to you for something I can never truly repay you for. I do not believe that I can ethically consider this an adequate way of repaying you for what you have done. I would have easily chosen to assist you, regardless of the circumstances under which I learned of your situation." Jim nodded shakily.

"Yeah, right, I'm sorry." He mumbled slowly pulling back. He was shocked by how ashamed he felt. He didn't know anything about this guy, but he felt like by insulting him, he'd done some terrible thing.

"I took no offense." Spock said quietly. "I understand this must be a very trying ordeal for you. I simply wish for you to know that my assistance is not given as payment or with a price." Jim nodded.

"I understand." He said quietly. "Thank you. This time, there was no desperation, just gratitude and relief. Spock seemed about to say something else, but he didn't. Instead, he stood up and walked over to the kitchen counter where his clothes were folded. He removed a device from the pile and returned to the bed, holding it out to Jim. It was a small dermal mender, for little, everyday injuries.

"I was given this in case of minor injuries. You may use it on yourself if you wish. I believe it would be wise for us both to bathe soon, before the ship arrives. I will use the shower first, if that is alright with you." Jim just nodded, taking the device from him. Spock stood up again and went into the bathroom, closing the door shut behind him. Jim looked at the device. It was clearly of Vulcan design, but there were only two buttons and a dial. A little exploration showed that the buttons simply turned it on and off. The turning the dial caused the brightness of the light to intensify, which probably meant a change in setting. He turned it up as high as it went, pulled open his robe, and began working on the bite marks on his neck.

* * *

><p>Spock heard the dermal mender working before he'd even pulled off his robe. He knew the device would work quickly, but he wasn't sure how long Jim would take. He wanted to give him privacy for it. He took his time removing the robe and adjusting the water to a temperature he was comfortable with. Vulcan's didn't normally care to be wet, being desert creatures after all, but there was no sonic setting in this one and he wanted to clean himself more thoroughly. As he picked up a fresh washcloth and the bottle of soap, he thought about Jim's reaction to what he'd been told.<p>

He'd reacted so desperately to what Spock had told him about a rescue in the works, like its success depended on his remaining in Spock's good graces. Once Spock had assured him otherwise, he'd seemed a little ashamed of his reaction, and then heartbreakingly sincere in his thanks. He seemed to be handling the whole situation remarkably well. He had not lashed out at Spock out of fear or anger, nor had he simply lost all will to fight. The only emotions he saw in those astonishing blue eyes were gratitude and relief. Earlier, they'd been full of such fear and desperation. However, when they'd made love (mated, he corrected himself), there had been what appeared to be genuine lust. The details of their initial coupling were somewhat hazy, though he knew Jim had responded to it, gasping out words of encouragement. Spock knew that he too had said things in the throes of passion that he hadn't known himself to be capable of saying. But the final time, when he'd already started to regain mental clarity, was very clear to him. The way Jim had pulled him closer, how his eyes had squeezed shut and his mouth had fallen open in ecstasy as he climaxed the final time…

Spock was shaken out of his thoughts as he realized, with alarm, that he was becoming aroused by the thoughts of the way Jim's body had responded to him. He felt a stab of shame. He'd studied enough about human anatomy to know that humans, whatever their sex, gender, or orientation, could be unwillingly stimulated to orgasm by an assailant. They did not have the kind of control over their bodies that Vulcans did. But, Jim had consented when he'd managed to communicate the fact that mating was necessary to his survival, and he was certain that Jim had actually given him positive feedback at some point or another. It had seemed quite genuine, not like he was just encouraging Spock in the hopes that he would think he was enjoying it and curb any aggression or for some other reason.

For a moment, Spock just stood under the water, focusing on forcing down his arousal. Whether Jim was truly willing, or had enjoyed it at all, it didn't change the fact that the choice had been forced on him by the two manipulative Ferengi and his own demanding need. He was in the next room, removing evidence of their intimacy, a thought that caused Spock's stomach to clench. It was possible that Jim wasn't attracted to males, which could only make the violation he felt even worse for him. And how was Spock going to explain the link that now existed between them? If Jim felt violated physically, how would he feel about being mentally bound to Spock, even for a short period of time?

The link. That was a great source of concern for Spock. It was already far stronger than his pre-bonding link with T'Pring had been. They would probably both have to be present for it to be broken. That thought had a similar affect as the one about Jim removing Spock's marks from his flesh. It was instinctive for a Vulcan to be possessive, or to feel defensive about the breaking of such ties to their mate. Though, he couldn't quite remember feeling that way when his link to T'Pring was broken. I was probably because of their lack of compatibility. If he was to be realistic, (which he always was) he had to admit that he and Jim shared a shocking amount of mental compatibility. After he'd entered the Fever, the first moment of anything close to clarity had come when he'd seen Jim on the monitor. He'd forgotten about the burning and focused all his attention on the man on the screen. He remembered the feeling of utter _want_ he'd experienced and shivered under the hot water. He fought to clear his mind. Recalling those events was not helping dim his arousal, and it felt horribly wrong to still lust after Jim when he was probably traumatized by had gone on between them.

He finished bathing himself and turned the water off. He listened carefully. He didn't hear the dermal mender going anymore. He toweled himself off as best he could, then put the robe back on. He'd left his clothes on the kitchen counter, and would have to wait until Jim used the shower to put them on. He opened the door again and saw Jim moving slowly about the room, stretching his sore muscles. The instinctive disappointment he felt at seeing his marks gone from Jim's body was negated by his relief to see him moving about on his own without too much discomfort. Jim turned and saw him standing there.

"If you feel able," said Spock, "perhaps you should take the opportunity to make use of the facilities while there is still plenty of time." Jim nodded.

"Yeah, I'll do that now." He headed into the bathroom and shut the door, leaving Spock to dress himself with his damaged clothing.

* * *

><p>Jim, now able to do it himself, set the water temperature as hot as he could handle and stepped under the spray. Now that he no longer had bruises scattered from his neck to his hips and…other places, he could comfortably maneuver himself and wash all over. The dermal mender had done its work quickly. The only pain he felt now was a minor ache in his arms and legs, and that would fade soon enough. As he stood under the spray, his thoughts turned to the man in the other room.<p>

He wondered why he was feeling so calm about all of it. He didn't know Spock at all, really. Somehow, initial reactions aside, learning that Spock was somehow acting on something beyond his control and that he was willing to help him now that he knew just what was going on was probably helping ease whatever fear he still felt. Or, maybe he was just in shock, and would eventually have some kind of breakdown. As he finished scrubbing and rinsing his body, he grabbed some shampoo and began to lather up his hair. As he rubbed over his scalp, his thoughts went back to after he and Spock had finished having sex, to the way he'd run his hand through his hair. He'd seemed so gentle and tender…

He shook his head. It didn't matter what he'd been like then. The only thing that mattered was that he was helping Jim escape and that Jim felt oddly safe with him in spite of what had happened. He finished up and began drying off. As much as he hated it, he had to put on a fresh uniform. They kept him surprisingly warm in the chilly room. He tried to remind himself that it didn't matter. Soon, he'd be far away from here and would never have to look at anything remotely resembling it again. After a moment's consideration, he put on another robe as well. The uniform was so form-fitting it didn't leave much to the imagination, and he didn't care to feel any more exposed than he already did.

He left the bathroom again to find Spock, dressed in his own clothes once more, looking through the cabinets in the kitchen area. He turned to face him.

"I apologize." He said quietly. "I thought it might be wise to find something to eat, as we will be here for several hours yet."

"Oh." Said Jim. "I guess that makes sense. The food's in the lower cabinets, they're refrigerated." Without even thinking about it, he walked over and bent down so he could rummage through the cabinets. He looked up and found Spock watching him rather intently. Clearing his throat a bit he asked, "Vulcans are vegetarians, right? I don't know if any of this is okay for you. I wasn't even sure if it would be okay for me." Spock crouched down next to him, and Jim couldn't help but be aware of how close he was, how warm, and other details like the slightly mussed hair or the tear in his collar from when he'd undressed. However, he didn't exactly feel uncomfortable. He tried to ignore it while Spock looked at some of the packaging on the food inside. He selected one bag and studied it more carefully.

"I believe this is some kind of salad." He said. "I believe this will be adequate for me, unless you would prefer to have it?" The last remark was said with significant uncertainty.

"No." Jim said quickly. "I'm not really a salad kind of guy." Spock's lips almost seemed to twitch upward for a fraction of a second. Then, he moved away to the upper cabinets in search of dishes. Jim returned his attention to the cabinet.

Spock was unsure about how to proceed. So far, Jim seemed to be taking his continued pres

* * *

><p>ence quite well, but that could change at any time. Trauma was a tricky thing to deal with, especially in a race as emotional as humans. It was possible, once the reality of what had happened set in, he would wish for distance between them. He could only hope that it did not happen while they were unable to leave the room.<p>

In addition to Jim, he had his own feelings to worry about. He'd been unable to resist staring at him as he crouched down to look through the cabinets, the robe stretched taut over his posterior. He'd been unable to resist moving close to him when he looked for something to eat. The possibility of what this might mean was troubling to him. It might mean that their link to each other would more difficult to break than Sarek had initially anticipated when he planned their trip to the Pleasure Palace.

He knew he was going to have to tell Jim somehow. For now though, all he could do was fix himself the salad and wait until after they'd eaten to try to explain more of the situation to him.

* * *

><p><strong>Maybe this is a bit off for how they should be reacting, but I don't want them to be freaked out or miserable while they're locked up together. We're finally on the road to getting Jim out!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**We'll be adding a couple other POV's throughout this story, but they won't last for too long. This is one such case. Also, we'll get to see the plan that Sarek has for rescuing Jim and the other prostitutes.**

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><p>Chapter 6<p>

Captain Christopher Pike sat before the computer in his ready room on the _Lincoln_. He was almost reeling over what he'd learned. He'd been contacted by Ambassador Sarek, the Vulcan diplomat to Earth, with some shocking news. James Kirk, the famed Kelvin baby, the now adult son of his Academy hero had been abducted from a transport and sold to a Ferengi-owned brothel.

The ambassador had explained to him, after extracting a sworn promise not to share certain details with anyone else, that his son had encountered Kirk in the establishment known as The Pleasure Palace on Omega Three. If it had been anyone else, anyone who wasn't a Vulcan, Pike would have suspected that the son was just the spoiled child having some illegal fun while hiding behind his father's diplomatic immunity. However, he knew for a fact that Vulcan's were not known to do such things. He replayed his conversation with the ambassador in his head.

"_Captain," intoned the deep voice, "I am grateful that you have accepted my call."_

"_Your Mr. Stonn said it was urgent." Pike replied, wishing he could see Sarek's face. The conversation was audio only. "May I ask why you needed to speak with me?"_

"_I am afraid I have some troubling news." The Vulcan replied solemnly. "I am currently in a facility on the second moon of Omega that serves the more…private needs of the wealthy in this sector." Pike knew enough about Vulcan-speak to know that that was their detached and neutral description for 'whorehouse'. "It has been brought to my attention that there are many here, some of them Federation members, who have been forced to comply with the demands of the management." There was a pause. "I believe that you may be familiar with one of them. James Kirk."_

To say that he'd been shocked was an understatement. For a moment, he'd assumed that Sarek had been made aware of Kirk's situation because he'd been a client. Fortunately, he'd been able to contain himself enough to ask how he came by the knowledge of what was going on there without implicating anything distasteful on his part. The ambassador, after getting his word as an officer to be as discreet as he could about it, explained that he'd brought his son in search of assistance for a dangerous condition. His 'condition', had been described in as few words as possible.

Pike actually wasn't too surprised by the details of his condition. He'd heard of Vulcans being secluded and later returned home, sometimes without warning, due to some mystery illness that none of them ever wanted to speak of. Since Sarek's son was suffering from this apparently dangerous condition, and they hadn't been aware of what was going on, it was highly unlikely that they would be in any trouble. Vulcans had an incredible tendency to avoid being held accountable for trouble caused by cultural differences while still managing to keep their secrets. What they had done was legal because of where it took place, and they were now actively seeking to help the imprisoned people.

The plan was pretty simple. Sarek had only paid the Ferengi he'd dealt with half of their requested fee. Using the link from his comm unit to the ship, Pike would record his payment. They wouldn't even need that, really. Sarek had already sent him a copy of a recording in which the Ferengi discussed Kirk's reluctance to cooperate and their plan to deal with it. The payment was just as a precaution.

Pike went back to work writing up the reason for his delay to his superiors. They were just on a star charting expedition at the moment, and he knew he'd be forgiven once they knew his reasons. His concern right now was how to explain it while still preserving the dignity of all innocent parties involved. He had time; it was another five hours yet before they reached Omega Two.

* * *

><p>Jim was beginning to feel a little antsy. It had been nearly two hours since he and Spock had both selected something to eat, and they hadn't spoken since. They both seemed to drag out eating as long as they could to avoid disturbing the strange lack of fear and anger between them. He had a feeling that Spock was taking the opportunity to figure out just what to say to his companion, so he decided to do the same.<p>

He couldn't really think of anything, though. Spock said that he wouldn't have expected him to service him for money if he'd known the circumstances of his being here. On the other hand, he'd also said that he might have tried to have sex with him anyway. Jim couldn't help but wonder what that might mean. Would anyone have been able to help him, or was there some necessary requirement that had to be met? He didn't know much about Vulcans, no one really did. They were extremely secretive.

When they had finished their food, Jim looked over at Spock. There was no table in the room, so they'd eaten sitting on the bed. The sheets, not the comforter. Without thinking, Jim gestured to Spock's bowl.

"Do you want me to take that?" Spock looked startled. Then he nodded.

"Yes, thank you." As he handed the bowl over, their fingers just barely brushed each other, causing a strange tingling sensation. Jim pulled his hand back slowly, startled by the feeling. If he hadn't been holding the bowl, he might have yanked his hand away, but he didn't. Spock seemed surprised, but not exactly troubled by whatever had just happened. Jim didn't say anything, he just got up and took the dishes over to the disposal unit. When he turned around, he saw Spock standing by the bed.

"Jim." He said quietly, looking him straight in the eye. "There are several very important things I must tell you while we are still able to speak privately."

"Okay." Said Jim slowly. He walked back over to the bed. Spock gestured to it.

"Please sit." Jim did as he asked, sitting cross-legged at the head of the bed. Spock followed his example, sitting down across from him close to the foot. Jim looked at him curiously.

"What is it we need to talk about?" Spock hesitated.

"I realize you must be wondering why I came here, and why I was sent to your room." Jim nodded for him to continue. "You must understand, this is something Vulcans rarely discuss with each other. It is never discussed with a non-Vulcan unless they are involved, which you are." He stopped and took a deep breath.

"Once a Vulcan reaches a certain point in his or her life, they go through a…mating drive, known as Pon Farr. Once a Vulcan enters Pon Farr, they must go to their bonded mate, usually chosen during childhood, or find another, lest they succumb to the Plak Tow, the Blood Fever, and die." Jim was shocked.

"That's why we had to…" he trailed off, and Spock nodded. "Why does it happen?" Spock shook his head.

"There is no certain explanation for why it occurs. But Pon Farr is, in a way, the final step in a Vulcan's puberty. It occurs during early adulthood, though mine would be considered premature by most. Once a Vulcan goes though this mating drive, it occurs again every seven years, usually for the rest of their life. Mine was quite premature, possibly because of the fact I that have a particularly unique heritage." Jim was a little confused by that statement, but he didn't say anything. Spock hesitated again. "Vulcans…we are very proud of our logic based lifestyle. Such a thing is considered shameful to us. Hence the secrecy surrounding it." Jim frowned.

"It doesn't really sound like something you can help. Why be ashamed of something natural?"

"It represents a loss of control." Replied Spock. "It is an unpleasant reminder of our violent past, of the dangerous emotional impulses that we have worked for centuries to repress."

"Right." Said Jim slowly. "I guess I can understand that. By why did you need to have sex with me?" Spock looked away for a moment, and Jim saw a faint green blush spreading over his face.

"As I said before, my Time came prematurely. I did not have a mate arranged for me, and there was no time to return to Vulcan to find one, or to try to seek help on Earth. I ignored the warning signs until it was too late for any more socially favorable option. My father learned of the existence and location of this place, and decided that this was my best option for survival. If a Vulcan is in the throes of the Fever, then who his or her mate is does not always matter. However, that Vulcan will be automatically drawn to someone with a mind that is compatible with their own." Jim nodded slowly.

"Is that why it had to be me?" Spock managed to look him in the eye again.

"Yes. My father's initial goal was to find someone who would simply be strong enough to handle a Vulcan's mating drive. However, I was immediately drawn to you. I was already in the grips of the Fever, but I experienced a moment of clarity as soon as I saw you for the first time. When the manager's saw how I reacted to seeing you on a monitor screen in an office-" he was cut off by Jim.

"What do you mean, monitor screen?" He looked around wildly, eyes coming to rest on the security camera on the wall that was aimed at the bed. He'd forgotten about it in light of everything that had happened since Spock had come into his room. "Oh my God!" He moaned, hunching over with his face in his hands. "They recorded us having sex, didn't they? Every single minute of it! They were probably watching!" He was nearly consumed by panic. All he could think was that if anyone saw that video, and how he'd agreed to have sex with Spock, how he'd responded to his touch, his body, they'd think he really was a whore and wouldn't believe that he was a captive here. "God, if anyone sees that…" he stopped speaking as Spock quickly moved closer and gently took hold of his wrists and pulled his hands away, causing him to look back up at him.

"Jim, it is highly unlikely that anyone saw anything. My father was given use of the office for our stay, and he would not have watched any of it. Only the two managers who arranged our meeting were aware of what was happening, so if they were unable to see, no one else probably would have. And I can assure you that no one will see anything we did that may have been recorded. I would be on any such recordings as well, and my father will not allow our family's name to be tarnished by such a thing. And I am more than willing to ensure that your dignity is preserved, even if I have to find and destroy the files myself." Even before Spock spoke, Jim could feel himself calming from his touch, as if Spock's very feelings were somehow flowing into him. He looked down at Spock's fingers wrapped around his wrists.

"How are you doing that?" He whispered. "I should be freaking out. I should have already been freaking out after I woke up, or when you first came in the room and jumped on me." Spock's green blush returned, but he didn't say anything. "Why does your touching me calm me down?" Spock lowered his eyes again. He seemed to be contemplating what to say in reply. The whole time, he maintained his gentle hold on Jim's wrists. Finally, he looked back up again.

"I would not blame you if you do 'freak out' once you know what I have done."

"Wait, hang on." Cut in Jim. "You started to say something before I bugged out about the camera. What were you going to say?"

"My father discovered that the managers he spoke with agreed to let me meet with you, partly because my reaction to seeing you on the screen led them to believe that my father would pay significantly more for your service, which they needed in order to gain a financial edge over their fellow managers, and also because you showed significant resistance in an earlier incident. They hoped that being forced to assist me through my Time as punishment for your actions would alter your view on resistance. They assumed that I would not need your willing compliance to proceed." He paused, his thumbs lightly stroking the inside of Jim's wrists, as if to try and stave off another fit of panic. "However, whatever your reasons for consenting, it does not excuse what I have done."

"What exactly did you do?" Asked Jim. "Compared to what those guys sent you in here for, I don't know what you could've done that's so terrible." Spock paused again.

"Do you recall what I said about mental compatibility?" At Jim's nod, he continued. "Vulcan couples are usually not fully bonded before Pon Farr. They meld during the Fever, and that solidifies the bond between them. I was extremely drawn to you, and unable to resist melding with you. As a result, there is now a link between our minds, tying us together." He seemed to brace himself for Jim's reaction. Jim slowly pulled his hands away. Spock almost seemed to tighten his grip before letting go.

"Just give me a minute, okay?" Jim rubbed at his temples. He looked at Spock again. "Is this link why I'm not panicking about everything that's happened so far?"

"It is possible. I may be unintentionally projecting calming thoughts to you out of a desire to ease your fear." Suddenly seeming worried, he added. "I assure you, I am not deliberately controlling your emotions." Looking into his concerned eyes, Jim believed him.

"Okay." He nodded slowly. "Is this a permanent thing?" Spock's reply was slow, as if he didn't actually want to say the words.

"It is possible to have it broken. There is a Healer on my father's ship. He would have to assess the strength of the link, but he would most likely be able to break it." He lowered his eyes again. Jim felt a sliver of concern and uncertainty.

"Isn't that a good thing?" Spock met his eyes again.

"I apologize, but the reason we arrange marriages at such a young age is because having a mate is a way of ensuring survival. To have one's mate wish to dissolve any connection is…troubling."

"Oh." Said Jim, quietly. "Well, it's over now, that means you've got another seven years to find someone else, right?"

"I do not know." Admitted Spock. "My cycle lasted less than a day. I do not know how long it normally lasts. It is a private matter, but I have observed when bonded couples withdrew to solitude for prolonged periods of time, and it was always for at least three days. I cannot predict when my Time will come again." Jim's eyes widened a bit. He couldn't imagine a minimum of three full days as intense as the sixteen hours they'd spent together.

"So," he said, trying to change the subject, "what exactly does this Healer guy need to do?" He regretted asking almost immediately, since it was clearly not a subject Spock wanted to discuss. Before he could take back his question though, Spock answered.

"He will meld with one of us, most likely me, and assess the strength of the link. Then, once any and all requirements are met, he will employ the proper mental techniques to sever it." Jim spoke again without thinking.

"Does this sort of thing happen a lot?" Spock shook his head minutely.

"It is rare, but not unheard of. I have heard of only a few links, and ever fewer full bonds being intentionally severed." Jim frowned.

"What's the difference between a link and a bond?" Spock's voice took on a tone that Jim could only describe as 'lecturing'.

"A link is a light connection between two future mates that allows them to become accustomed to each other's mental presence. It can allow them to empathically sense one another, depending on how open they allow it to be. Some future mates prefer to maintain their privacy at first, keeping mental shields in place, but they are encouraged to allow some contact between their minds. This link will draw them together when one of them enters Pon Farr, and then it will form a full mating bond." He paused. "Links can be dissolved during childhood if the two future spouses prove they are not compatible enough to coexist properly. As I said, I have only heard of a few full bonds being broken by anything other than outside interference or death. In those cases, the incompatibility of the two minds involved was either never discovered, due to mental barriers, or ignored for the sake of family honor." Something about the way Spock said those last words seemed to hold certain…negativity. Jim frowned.

"You said that these links get formed when you're kids. Does that mean that you were supposed to be with someone else?" Spock shook his head.

"No. I was linked to someone during my childhood, but we were both unsatisfied with the match and had it dissolved. My human heritage made me undesirable in the eyes of many parents, so mine were rather desperate by the time they found her. However, it would not have worked for us, hence the separation. She went on to bond with another, and I was left 'unattached' as you might say." Jim was so surprised he almost missed the rest of what Spock said.

"Human heritage?" Spock nodded slowly.

"I am half human, on my mother's side. It is likely the reason my Fever did not last the average time. Indeed, I thought I might be spared the cycle completely. I do not know for certain how much time I have before I enter it again." Jim nodded hesitantly. Unique indeed. But that really wasn't important.

"Did it hurt or anything, when you had your first link broken?" Spock considered it.

"I am unsure how to describe it, especially to a non-telepath. It likely varies between individuals who experience it. We were linked for nearly eleven years. Having her presence removed from my mind left an absence of sorts, but the fact that it caused me significant discomfort unless I shielded myself against it made it somewhat of a relief as well. There were many who attributed it to my human side, but I believe it is normal for full-blooded Vulcans as well. Perhaps it could be likened to the unexpected removal of a weight holding you down. On the one hand, it would be much easier and more comfortable to move without it. On the other hand, being so used to having it there and then having it removed might leave a sense of unbalance, a constant sensation as if something is suddenly missing or forgotten, because you had become so accustomed to its presence and accommodating it, at least until you have adjusted to its absence. I do not know if that makes any sense to you." Jim nodded slowly.

"I think I get it. I know it's hard to make changes sometimes, even if it could be for the better, because at least you know what to expect with what you've got, and how to cope with it. You're saying you got used to how things were, and the change was kind of unsettling even if it turned out to be better for you. You just had to get used to the difference." Spock nodded, looking relieved that Jim seemed to grasp his meaning so easily. Jim had another question yet. "Why did we end up linked? Is that normal?"

"I do not know." Replied Spock, almost sounding apologetic. "I believe we share a significant enough amount of mental compatibility, for it seems to have been formed with surprising ease. My only other experience was the previous link I shared with my former intended." He paused. "If the differences between the links are anything to judge by, I cannot predict what it will be like to have it removed." Jim nodded again.

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see." Spock nodded in silent agreement. For a moment, they just sat there in silence. Jim marveled once more at how calm he'd remained about the whole thing. "I think I understand everything you've told me." He said. "Is there anything else we need to talk about, while we're still alone?" Spock seemed to think about it.

"Not that I am aware of." He slowly got up from the bed. "I believe it would be wise for me to use this time to meditate. You may wish to get some more rest as well. I imagine Captain Pike will want to speak with you in regards to what has transpired here. You may be needed to give testimony, and it would be best if you are completely alert for it." Jim nodded.

"Yeah, you're right." With that, Jim also got off the bed and went into the bathroom to use the facilities before he attempted to rest some more.

* * *

><p>As Spock seated himself on the floor and tried to center his mind, he couldn't help but replay certain details of their conversation in his mind. What surprised him more than anything was the way Jim had remained incredibly calm, barring that one outburst, and how there was no blame in his eyes or voice for what Spock had done. And he'd shown enough intelligence to understand when he'd tried to describe the effects of having his link with T'Pring removed.<p>

There was one thing that he hadn't mentioned though. It was something his father would have probably wanted to mention before anything else. If Jim recounted the events of their mating to Captain Pike, it could have serious repercussions for his family. Jim hadn't shown any indication of wanting to accuse him of anything, but that might still change. In all honesty, Spock couldn't bring himself to care. He'd secured himself an unsuspecting temporary mate, something that shamed him to his very soul. He couldn't bring himself to ask Jim to not hold him accountable, even though he seemed to feel that way so far.

Maybe Jim was too grateful for being rescued to take any action against him, or he feared what he might face as a response to any accusation. Spock had told him that he was a member of an old and powerful clan, and that might be intimidating to someone in Jim's position. Perhaps once the link was gone, they'd simply go their separate ways and none of it would ever be mentioned again. It was the typical Vulcan way to act as if something shameful had never happened. Only time would tell.

As he worked to clear his mind, he was aware of Jim returning to the room, looking at him for a moment, and then getting on the bed. He had to fight the urge to join him there, as if they were proper spouses. Spock knew this could mean trouble for him. Whatever he might have expected when he'd been brought here, this wasn't it. Once again, he thought as he tried once more to center his thoughts, only time would tell.

* * *

><p><strong>I promise this story is my top priority (outside of real life, of course) but I'm toying with some other ideas for the future. I just saw Green Lantern, and while it's not the best movie I've ever seen, I'm already into HalSinestro. I wouldn't mind writing that pairing, or at least pre-pairing. What do you think? And does anyone know where I can find more stories about them? It feels like I've already hit a dead end there. More next week!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's the moment a lot of people have been looking forward to. Jim's finally going to get out of the Palace, and you'll get a hint of what the aftermath of everything will be.**

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><p>Chapter Seven<p>

Spock was roused from his meditation by the sound of his comm unit ringing softly. A quick glance at the clock showed him he'd been meditating for nearly five hours, the amount of time it Sarek had said it would take Captain Pike and his ship to arrive. He pulled the comm unit out of his pocket and answered quietly, aware that Jim was curled up and sleeping soundly on the bed.

"Father?" He asked softly, wanting to hear news of the situation.

"Spock." His father answered quietly. "I have just spoken with Captain Pike again. He is waiting for me to reconnect with him so that he may record the new deal I am about to make with the Ferengi managers. I will contact you again when we can safely let you out of the room."

"Are you concerned about resistance from security?" Asked Spock, feeling a little concerned himself.

"This facility appears to have little in the way of guards." Replied Sarek. "However, it is not without its defenses. It would appear that the ankle cuff you described has enough power in it to be used as a last resort to kill the beings wearing them if necessary. We must be careful to not alarm the managers into thinking that they're only chance of escaping punishment is to eliminate the victims to prevent them from acting as witnesses. As only the two we met are involved in dealing with us, it is likely that the others will not know until it is too late, after Captain Pike has already taken control of the facility."

"I understand." Said Spock. He hesitated. "Father…"

"Yes?" Replied Sarek immediately. Spock pushed on.

"Jim showed some…distress over the fact that there is a camera recording in here, and that it likely has footage of our earlier actions. I have attempted to assure him that no one was probably watching, and he is calmer now. However, I think he will still be worried about the possibility of anyone viewing it."

"That is understandable." Remarked Sarek. "I myself had the same concern and investigated it. Fortunately, it would seem that the camera is only connected to the monitor in this office. One of the managers we met with, Barbo, was the one who arranged Mr. Kirk's purchase, so he was charged with monitoring him to make sure he was compliant at a later time." He paused. "I believe I should be able to secure and erase any footage showing the two of you."

"I would prefer to do so myself." Said Spock quickly. "This also concerns me, after all." Sarek took a moment to reply.

"Yes, of course. I will contact you again when it is safe for you to be removed."

"Understood." Said Spock. He signed off. He glanced over to the bed where Jim was still resting. He saw no need to wake him immediately. It would be better to let him rest while he could. They would both need their energy for what was yet to come.

* * *

><p>Captain Pike sat in his chair in his ready room. His first officer and former communications officer, Number One, was with him. A security team was currently awaiting the order to go down and secure the facility. They were waiting for a signal from Sarek's ship that would let his her know when to start recording the new deal he was about to make with the Ferengi. They needed to do this in order to have a reason to storm the place. Sarek couldn't risk sending the recorded data he'd already gathered because their security system might detect it being sent. Once they had the facility secure, they would be able to take the data Sarek had gathered and Pike would be able to charge them with kidnapping and unlawful imprisonment of Federation citizens.<p>

As he sat there, listening to the sound of Number One setting things up in the background, he thought about what he knew about James Kirk, or Jim, as he preferred to be called. He'd met him once as a young boy, at a Starfleet event his family had been invited to. He'd been about twelve years old, already sharp as a nail and rude enough to give a Tellerite a run for his money. Pike had meant to offer to recommend Jim for a junior Starfleet program, but his negative reaction to the mere suggestion that he might do well in Starfleet one day was enough to hold him back. A check into Jim's troubled background, which included some of what was technically criminal activity, made him decide to give up on it.

His negative attitude wasn't entirely surprising. Many children who had lost a parent to the service held some animosity toward it. Still, Jim had seemed upset by the mere mention of it, as if just suggesting that he might want to join someday offended him. But that wasn't why he was here now.

He was here now to get Jim out of this place. He knew he was going to need his full medical and psychological staff available for the arrival of the prisoners. He had no idea what their physical or mental states might be. They'd all have to give some kind of statement about how they'd come to be there and their treatment since.

Unfortunately, there was little that they could do about the Ferengi managers. If captured by Federation/Starfleet forces, they could be tried by their captors for crimes against member species. However, since the Ferengi themselves were not members, they would probably be forced to let them go. And no Ferengi cared about what laws were being broken as long as they could follow their precious Rules of Acquisition. The trade of sentient life forms was perfectly acceptable to them, and once those managers were released, they would probably go right back to it.

Pike tried to clear his head. He couldn't dwell on those thoughts. Right now, all that mattered was getting Kirk, the Ambassador and his son, and all those other people out of there. He went back to work on his preparations, before sending another call to the Ambassador.

* * *

><p>Spock was roused from his meditation by the sound of his comm ringing. He answered it quickly.<p>

"Spock." Came Sarek's voice. "I have just been contacted by Captain Pike." Spock was immediately fully alert.

"And?"

"He and his men will be beaming down at any moment. You must prepare to leave."

"Understood." Said Spock. He quickly hung up the communicator. He looked over at Jim on the bed, still resting quite peacefully. For a moment, he could not move. He only wished to stay here and watch his mate rest, oblivious to the cares of life and the unfortunate events that had recently transpired. But he knew it could not last. He moved over and very lightly laid his hand on Jim's shoulder.

"Jim." He said softly, gently shaking the young man. "You must wake up. It is almost time for us to leave." Jim's eyes opened, his gaze already rather clear. He focused on Spock immediately and sat up. It seemed the rest had done him good if he was already this sharp after waking. Spock felt a surge of gratitude for the fact that Jim was reacting calmly and did not flinch away from his touch.

"What?" Asked Jim, having not heard what Spock said.

"It is almost time to leave." He repeated quietly. He forced himself to move away from the bed. He saw Jim pulling his robe tighter around himself and remembered that it, and the uniform beneath it, was all he had to shield himself from the gazes of both his captors and his rescuers. Without thinking about it, he removed his own long coat and held it out to Jim. Jim looked startled, but made no move to take it.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Take it." Said Spock, continuing to hold it out towards him. "It will cover you more adequately than the robe you are wearing."

"Won't you be cold without it?" Asked Jim, not sure he wanted to accept it from this man he'd had such a strange encounter with.

"I will be perfectly fine. I would prefer you wear it if it makes you feel more secure in your appearance." Jim watched him for a moment, then slowly reached for it. Their fingers brushed ever so lightly as he took the coat from Spock's outstretched hand. Spock felt a thrill of sensation at the contact and struggled not to let it show on his face. If Jim felt anything, his reaction was probably concealed by his already nervous attitude. He backed away and slowly began untying his robe. Spock turned away casually, trying to give Jim some privacy without being obvious about it, even though he wouldn't have minded being treated to another view of Jim in the skintight uniform. Jim would surely be further unsettled if he was aware of Spock's continuing desire for him.

When he turned back, Jim was wrapped in his long coat. He still had no shoes, so they would have to wait for him to get some from their rescuers.

It was not even anther fifteen minutes before there was suddenly a knock on the door. No one working for the establishment would have given any indication that they were about to enter. Kirk stood up from where he'd sat on the bed, and Spock's posture stiffened automatically.

The door whooshed open and a middle-aged man with steely eyes and graying hair in a gold command uniform stepped in flanked by two red-clad security officers.

"Jim? Spock?" They both nodded in confirmation. "I'm Captain Pike. We're here to rescue you."

* * *

><p>Jim almost couldn't believe what was happening. It was like when he'd first learned that he'd been captured, but without the fear of what was to come. He and Spock had been split up after being led out of the room. He should be shouting for joy, or perhaps at least be happy that he no longer had to be confined with the man who had no idea how to feel about, but for some reason, all Jim could think about was giving the Vulcan back his coat.<p>

Pike had been extremely cautious with him, acting like one would around a spooked animal that would bolt at one wrong move. Of course, Pike thought he was dealing with a rape victim. Everyone did. Jim wasn't sure how to feel about it. The first thing they'd done was have the ankle cuff removed and placed inside a box designed for holding disarmed bombs. He could hear voices all around him, 'employees voicing both gratitude and displeasure. Most of the latter were Orions. There must have been more like the female he met, thought Jim, people who were actually professionals who stayed here willingly, in spite of the fact that there were others being forced to do this work.

As he just barely acknowledged the officers and slaves around him, his mind drifted back to his Vulcan companion. What was happening to Spock?

* * *

><p>Spock had immediately been led by a security officer to his father's transport. Sarek was waiting inside.<p>

"My son." He said. His face was carefully blank, as always, but Spock almost thought he could see some measure of relief there.

"Why are we here?" Asked Spock. "We cannot leave yet. I have not purged the records of their footage with Jim. Also, from what I can assess of the link between us, he will need to be in close range for it to be broken."

"Very well." Said Sarek. "Once that is done we will move on to Earth, and after our business there is finished, we will return to Vulcan and begin the process of finding you a new mate. And I will contact the VSA to ask that they might reconsider your admittance." Spock started.

"Why would you do either of those things?" He asked. Sarek looked puzzled.

"I would believe that this experience has shown you how beneficial it would be to have a mate waiting for you in your time of need." He replied. "And obviously the VSA council would overlook your behavior in light of your condition-"

"Stop!" Snapped Spock, one hand cutting through the air sharply. Sarek fell silent. "_Your_ first choice of mate for me was not compatible. I will seek my own mate and decide for myself if he or she can be a suitable partner. And my condition had nothing to do with my response to the minister's crass attitude. I was perfectly aware and sincere about my choice. I have had enough of people like them sneering at our entire family because of who my mother is. She has been nothing but supportive to me in my life, far more so than anyone else. She stood by and allowed it as you ignored every insult anyone dared speak to her face, knowing that you would be too 'honorable' to defend her. And she has the capacity for love within herself to allow her to live with a husband and son who spend their days pretending they do not love her in return." Sarek was speechless. Spock looked at him, perfectly calm now. "I believe the authorities wish to receive some kind of statement from me. I must speak with Captain Pike. Perhaps you should simply beam up, and I can return with the shuttle when I have Jim with me. He may be intimidated by the prospect of interacting with more Vulcans without adequate time to prepare himself." With that, he walked out of the shuttle.

Sarek just stared out the hatch where he'd left. Why would Spock have said that? He did not pretend not to love his wife. She was perfectly aware of how he felt for her. He knew that it would be a good idea for him to leave separately, not just because it would give his son time to prepare his temporary mate for their 'divorce', but also because he was uncertain as to how he would face either one of them right now.

* * *

><p>Pike stood in the room where the rescued occupants of the Pleasure Palace were waiting to be cleared for beam-up. The <em>Lincoln's<em> medical staff was checking them for any kind of diseases, sexual or otherwise, that they might need to have treated once they were aboard. So far, they seemed to be fine. It seemed that the establishment took good enough care of its employees, aside from enslaving them, of course.

Pike didn't know what to make of Jim. He'd made it clear that he would give a statement, but that he wouldn't press charges against the Vulcan's who'd purchased his 'services'. Pike could understand that they weren't really guilty of anything, but he was surprised that Jim could. People who were traumatized couldn't always determine who was deserving of their anger. But Jim seemed to have decided that Mr. Spock wasn't the one.

"I'll make a statement that I was abducted and that a customer helped me when he realized what was going on, but I'm not saying any more than that. You've got plenty of other people who've been here longer than me who'll tell their stories to a jury. I just want to go home."

That had been that. Chris knew there was no point in trying to convince him to do more. The only thing he'd mentioned about his 'client' in his statement was that he was an adult, non-human male. He hadn't mentioned a name, or a species, or even if they'd had sex. They must have though, if what Chris had heard about this Vulcan mystery illness was true. Still, Jim didn't seem any worse for wear, at least not at the moment, and the Vulcans technically hadn't done anything illegal, seeing as they hadn't known Jim's status as a prisoner at the time.

There were plenty of other clients that were aware though, Chris was sure of it. That's why the ship's psychologists were here as well to help Security conduct interviews. He was going to have to get back to work himself, but first he wanted to inform Jim about his eventual return home. He walked out to the balcony where Jim was sitting, just staring at his surroundings. He'd been cooped up inside for over a week; he just needed to be out in the open right now. Pike had been surprised to see the coat he was wearing; it was clearly too long for him and not a typical human style. He realized he must have got it from the Vulcan. Maybe that's why he was so quick to excuse the guy, because he'd been kind to him.

"Jim?" He said tentatively. Jim looked over at him. He seemed fairly calm. That might be about to change, thought Chris reluctantly. "I've been given orders to put our star charting mission on hold in order to return these people to their home planets." He hesitated. "As you are the only person here from Earth, and the fact that it's one of the furthest planets from here, you'll be the last person we drop off." Jim stood up quickly.

"Why?" He asked, sounding a little angry. "Can't you drop me off somewhere, like a starbase, or find another ship that can take me straight home? That's all I'm asking!"

"I'd be glad to do that," replied Chris, trying to calm him, "but it would still be too far out of our way. My counselors believe that changing scenery too many times and contact with too many strangers would be further traumatizing to these people, and even a trip to a starbase or a rendezvous with another ship would be too far out of our way. I'm sorry Jim, there's just no other way." He nearly jumped when a voice spoke up behind him.

"He can come with me."

* * *

><p>Spock had been looking for an officer to give a statement to, but they all seemed busy interviewing, assessing, and soothing the captive employees. He now had his personal padd, which his father had brought along for some reason. He decided to use it as an opportunity to keep his promise to Jim. As he began hacking into the facility's security cameras and waited unnoticed for someone to become available, he began to feel a sense of distress buzzing from the link. He immediately began looking for Jim. The only explanation for the feeling was that Jim was distressed about something.<p>

He found Jim and a man in his early forties with a Captain's uniform talking. He realized that must be Captain Pike. Jim looked agitated, and the man was clearly trying to calm him. He caught part of the conversation. Jim was asking why he had to wait so long to be returned home, and Pike was trying to explain. Spock felt distress of his own, caused both by Jim's distress and the thought of Jim going so far away.

"He can come with me." He said without thinking. Both of them turned to look at him, clearly surprised. Pike responded first in a carefully diplomatic tone.

"A thoughtful gesture, but I don't think it's a good idea."

"Earth is our destination, and we will be getting there within two weeks, perhaps sooner as we must make up for the time we lost when we diverted here." Replied Spock. "He turned to address Jim. "I can promise you that the trip will be uneventful, and you can contact your family from onboard." Jim seemed to hesitate, then replied.

"Okay." Spock had to admit, he was more than a little surprised. Judging from the look on Pike's face, he was too.

"Jim," said Pike, sounding a little more anxious, "After an ordeal like yours, I think it would be best for you to settle down for a while and talk with a counselor."

"He can do both those things on my father's cruiser." Retorted Spock.

"Can I talk for one second?" Snapped Jim. Both Spock and Pike shut right up. Spock felt horribly embarrassed for speaking about Jim as if he was not standing right in front of him. Jim turned to address him.

"You said it'll just take a couple weeks to get back to Earth?" He asked.

"Or sooner." Replied Spock. "As I said, our…detour here caused us to fall behind. I would not be surprised if our engineers push us there at a faster speed than is typical. And," he added, glancing at Pike, "you could speak with a councilor, Starfleet or civilian, from any console." Jim turned to look at Pike again.

"Is that okay with you?" He asked coolly. Pike looked reluctant as he nodded.

"I guess I don't have a choice. Go ahead and go if it's what you want. But don't hesitate to comm me if you need help, because I'll make sure you get it." It was his turn to glance at Spock as he spoke, and Spock could read the subtle threat in his eyes. Did he suspect that Spock might try to harm Jim? It certainly looked that way. Of course in Pike's eyes, his offer probably looked like a rapist offering his victim a ride. Spock could understand and forgive his suspicions if that were the case, as he was only looking out for Jim's best interests.

As Pike left, Spock turned back to Jim. He was still wearing Spock's coat, and it caused a unfamiliar sensation him.

"So," he said, breaking the silence, "when do we have to go?"

"As it would appear that I and my father are no longer needed by the authorities, and Captain Pike knows where you are going, we could depart now, if you wish." Replied Spock. Jim hesitated. "Is something wrong?" He shrugged.

"I brought some stuff with me. I was told that I could earn it back with good behavior, so I assume it's around here somewhere. It was just a couple of suitcases; some clothes, toiletries, and my personal padd." He groaned suddenly and put a hand to his face. "Shit, that thing has my bank accounts on it! If they broke through my security, they probably took everything out of them!"

"Please relax." Said Spock, trying not to let it show how much Jim's distress was affecting him. He was right, though. Identity theft was one of many ways the Ferengi had learned to 'acquire' more profit. "I am certain that we can find your possessions, and have your money returned to you if it has been stolen." He looked around briefly. "I believe I overheard one of the security officers speaking of a 'vault' filled with personal items. It is possible that they took your things there."

"Do you think we can find it?" Asked Jim anxiously. Spock nodded.

"Follow me." He led Jim back into the building and to a secluded corridor. He came across a door whose code, thankfully, had already been broken. Inside were many items of varying value. Jim looked around quickly, then spotted something in one of the corners. There were two simple suitcases and a large shoulder bag. Jim rushed over to them and began looking through them, one by one. Finally he sat back, looking relieved.

"It's all here." He murmured. He looked up at Spock. "I guess they didn't have a chance to go through my stuff to look for anything valuable." He stood up, dragging one of the suitcases with him. "Do you mind if I find somewhere to get changed?" He asked quietly. "I'd rather just leave this," he indicated at some white poking out of one of Spock's coat sleeves, "behind. Plus, you need your coat back." Spock was surprised. He'd forgotten all about the coat.

"I am perfectly fine without it." He replied. "However, if you wish to change, then do so." He looked around. There was no one coming down the hall at this time. "If you wish, I can step outside and you can change your clothes quickly in here." Jim nodded after a moment's consideration. Spock quickly stepped outside.

As he listened to the sound of clothing rustling within, he couldn't help but recall bits and pieces of his Time; he could see patches in his mind of Jim peeling off the white uniform while he tore at his own clothes frantically. Suddenly, he remembered that he had yet to remove the footage that the security camera had of Jim from his captivity. He pulled out his own personal padd and finished hacking into their system. It didn't take long to find what he was looking for. As he proceeded to erase the files, an option appeared on his padd asking him if he wanted to save a backup copy on his padd. For a moment he was stuck. Was he really going to save footage of this terrible mistake? Suddenly, the memory of Jim under him, his face contorted in ecstasy came back to him. He heard the sound of steps coming out of the vault, quickly hit save, and tucked his padd away as Jim emerged dressed in plain civilian clothing and shoes. He was wearing the shoulder bag, Spock's coat and the white uniform draped over it, and had one suitcase in each hand. Spock immediately stepped forward.

"May I carry one of those for you?" He asked without thinking. Jim looked startled.

"Yeah, sure." He said, letting go of one. Then he pulled Spock's coat off of the bag and held it out to him. "Here." Spock took it wordlessly and put it on before taking the suitcase in hand. It was not very heavy by human or Vulcan standards, so he had no trouble carrying it. Jim seemed a little off balance for a moment, but then he set the case down and pulled on a second handle, which extended, allowing him to drag it on a pair of wheels that had escaped Spock's notice before.

They made their way to the shuttle, stopping only for a moment. The Pleasure Palace had a spectacular view on one side of the planet's sea, and there was a balcony on the roof that stretched out over the water. Leaving his bags right outside the shuttle, Jim took the white uniform, balled up the fabric tightly, and threw it as hard as he could into the waves. The cloth remained afloat for a moment, then slowly saturated and sank beneath the surface of the water.

He returned to the shuttle entrance where Spock was waiting, picked up his bags, and stepped inside. Suddenly, Spock became painfully aware of the size of the shuttle. Jim could chose to sit as far away from him as possible if he wished, but Jim slowly settled into one of the two front seats, looking a little tense. Spock desperately tried to think of something to help calm his companion. Humans, he knew, tended to try and diffuse tense situations with humor. That might be worth a try. He glanced at Jim as he settled into his own seat and began to prepare for takeoff.

"I do not know if you are aware, but all the inhabited planets in the Omega system share a strict no-littering policy." Jim's head snapped up and he looked at Spock incredulously, a huff of what sounded like laughter coming from his mouth, a small smile twisting on his lips. Spock said nothing further, only allowing a slight smile of his own as he powered up the shuttle. Suddenly, the ride together didn't seem so impossible.

* * *

><p>Jim hadn't known what he was thinking at first. Taking the guy who paid to sleep with him up on his offer of a ride home? Had he been too hasty in rejecting Pike's ship because he wanted to get home quickly? Those doubts began to intensify when Spock had shown him where his things were being held and he changed his clothes. Here he was, stripping just a few feet away from the guy who'd tried to rip his clothing off earlier, with nothing to assure Jim that he would stay outside other than what tentative impression he'd been able to form so far.<p>

He did his best to push those thoughts aside and dressed himself as quickly as possible. Spock acted as courteous as any good host; he offered to help Jim with his luggage, opened the shuttle door for him, and didn't say a word when Jim abruptly made his way over to the balcony overlooking the sea so he could throw that damned uniform as far away as he could.

He'd been tense as he boarded the shuttle and sat down next to Spock. However, it was completely diffused when Spock suddenly made a comment about the planet's laws concerning littering. Jim had laughed before he could think about it and just like that, things were fine. Jim realized it was the first time he'd smiled in weeks. He'd already been tense and on edge just about seeing his brother for the first time in nearly a decade, and his captivity had hardly helped matters. His new relaxed demeanor caused him to speak up without thinking.

"Is there anything I'll need to do when we get to your ship?" Spock stiffened in the seat next to him. He answered slowly.

"We will have to have our link assessed by a Healer to determine how and when would be best to break it." Jim didn't know how to respond to that. He'd actually forgotten all about the link. Spock almost sounded upset about having it broken. He knew Vulcans were private beings; maybe he was just upset about someone getting the chance to peek into his head. Jim wasn't crazy about the idea himself. But if it was what had to be done, then that's what he'd do.

* * *

><p>Spock was shocked by how the reminder of the link-breaking rattled him. In his eagerness to help Jim, he'd forgotten all about it. He tried to remind himself that it was normal to feel this way, that having a link broken was like refusing a life-saving procedure. It was like inviting death to come when the Time did. Spock would have to move on and find another mate. All that mattered now was getting Jim safely back where he belonged, and doing whatever he could do to repay him for the indignities he'd suffered because of Spock's evolution and the Ferengi's greed.<p>

Wherever they were, Spock illogically hoped that they suffered plenty of indignities of their own. As his father's ship's docking bay came into view, he tried and failed to feel relief. He should be glad that he would no longer have an unwilling bondmate. Jim would certainly be happy to be free again. He still feared the moment that his mate might suddenly begin viewing him they way Pike and probably several other people couldn't help: As a rapist.

All he could do right now was try to do right by the man who'd been forced to save his life by doing the right thing and having the link broken. No matter how much it might hurt him to do it.

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry, but how they deal with the link will have to wait until next week. Maybe later, if work continues to be as soul-crushing as it's been lately.<strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm so so **_**so**_** sorry about the lateness, but I warned you all that this could happen. Please stay tuned after the chapter for an important announcement from the author.**

* * *

><p>Chapter Eight<p>

Jim couldn't help but feel a wave of admiration as the Vulcan ship came into view. For all their logic, Vulcan's had surprisingly impeccable taste in aesthetics. The ship was large, but also sleek. It was clearly meant to transport dignitaries in comfort. As Spock docked the shuttle, Jim felt his admiration quickly overrun by apprehension. He had no idea what to expect from the other Vulcans, or the link breaking that Spock had spoken of.

He wondered what that would entail. He had no idea about what effect melding could have other than his one recent experience and it had been with a Vulcan who was in a sexual frenzy. It probably wasn't something to judge from. Besides, melds might be like fingerprints; a different kind for every individual.

The shuttle docked and Jim and Spock both stood up. Spock didn't say anything as he grabbed the suitcase he'd carried before, as if he'd done it a thousand times in the past. He just moved to the door. Jim followed him without comment, his other bags in tow. He stepped out the doorway behind Spock and was greeted by the sight of a sizable hanger bay occupied by a few other shuttles and three solemn Vulcans.

His gaze was first drawn to the one in the center. He was probably middle-aged with graying hair and sharp black eyes and bore a striking resemblance to Spock. He vaguely recalled Spock mentioning his father. This must be him. Next, he looked at the one to the left. He was tall and pale with dark hair, just like most Vulcans. His eyes, however, were blue, a rarity among Vulcans. His ears were also little larger than what Jim would have expected, making him look somewhat awkward compared to the others, but not at all ugly. He appeared to be about Spock's age and, if Jim could read him at all, looked a little anxious. On the right was a Vulcan who was rather advanced in age. Not quite elderly, but certainly past his prime. All of them had their eyes on the pair emerging from the shuttle. Jim fought the urge to cringe. Spock surprised him by standing in front of him, partially blocking him from their gaze.

"Father." He said, addressing the one in the center and confirming Jim's guess.

"Spock." He replied solemnly. Spock turned to Jim and began making introductions, gesturing to each Vulcan as he spoke.

"Jim, this is Sarek, my father, Fer'at, the ship's primary Healer, and Stonn, a former classmate of mine." He turned back to the three Vulcans. "This is Jim Kirk. He is in need of transport to Earth and will be coming with us." He turned to address the eldest one, Fer'at. "We will both be in need of an examination to determine if we have been exposed to anything potentially harmful." The healer nodded.

"Of course." He gestured in the direction of a doorway. Spock started toward it, Jim close behind. In his peripheral vision, Jim could see the three Vulcan's exchanging discreet glances with each other. He realized that they all knew the truth, and that they were making a silent agreement to not say otherwise. He felt a cold stab of shame as he realized they all knew he'd had sex with Spock. But, he reasoned, they probably knew why too, so they'd keep their mouths shut about it. He just tried to relax and focus on following Spock to the medbay, or wherever they were going. It would all be over soon. He could find somewhere on the ship to hole up and keep to himself until they reached Earth. Then he could go on with his life like none of this had ever happened.

* * *

><p>Spock had to fight not to drag his feet as they made their way through the corridors of the ship. <em>What I am feeling is normal<em>, he struggled to remind himself. It was a perfectly natural response to resist a link-breaking, especially one with a compatible mate. But it was for the best. Jim had consented to mate with him, or rather he'd been forced to. He had not consented to having his mind violated by a Vulcan's lust-addled one. The gratitude and guilt he felt for the whole experience was more than enough to force him to overcome his nervousness over what was to come.

He felt rather than saw Jim's surprise as they entered his living quarters instead of sickbay, as Jim was probably expecting. He turned to see him hovering uncertainly in the doorway.

"I thought you could leave your things here until we find you lodging for the journey." Jim nodded, looking a little calmer. He set his bags on the floor by the wall. He turned back to Spock.

"Are we going to sickbay or something now? You said that Healer guy would have to look at our minds to sort all this out." He must have seen the conflict on Spock's face. "Is something wrong?" Spock looked at him slowly.

"Please pardon my attitude." He said quietly. "I told you before that it goes against Vulcan instinct to break such a connection. I assure you I will be able to control myself and go through with it."

"Okay." Said Jim. He looked a little troubled, but he said nothing more.

"Follow me." Instructed Spock. He led Jim back out of the room. They were going to break the link, and Spock would do his best to be contented by the fact that he'd done right by the man who'd saved his life.

* * *

><p>Jim followed Spock quietly. He should have felt relieved by the fact that the Vulcan was going to keep his promise, but all he could feel was concern at his discomfort. Spock had said that it went against Vulcan instinct to break contact with a mate. Jim wondered if the mental link carried that instinct over to him as well, because he was beginning to feel more than a little nervous about it.<p>

It was probably just the thought of someone else rifling around in his head. Yeah, that had to be it. He just had to get through it and he'd be free to return home. Still, a part of him felt rather bad for Spock. Not only had he apparently been caught off guard by his weird sex disease and had probably been terrified of dying that way, alone and in pain. Breaking the link meant putting himself at risk for that same situation, maybe with different results next time. Jim could forgive him for being reluctant to put himself in that situation again.

It was with those thoughts in mind that Jim found himself being the one to hesitate as they found themselves before the doors that led into Sickbay. Spock seemed to notice his hesitation.

"Are you alright?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah." Said Jim, trying to hide his concern. "I just don't know what to expect." Spock must have believed him.

"I am sure the Healer will only need to meld with me. As humans are psi-null, it is unlikely that the effects of the broken link will cause you anything more than minor discomfort." Jim nodded, letting Spock think he'd been sufficiently reassured. They turned back to the doors and stepped through when they opened.

Jim was immediately greeted by the sight of a typical clean and sterile Sickbay. Normally, he hated to be in places like this, but his mind was elsewhere at the moment. That thought gave him pause. He was standing in a much-hated environment about to undergo an unfamiliar and possible dangerous procedure, and all he could think about was whether or not the stranger he was technically engaged to was okay.

He was forced to focus elsewhere as the three Vulcans from the hanger bay emerged from a room in the back, most likely the Healer's office. The Healer, Fer'at, cleared his throat.

"We are all clear on the situation at hand." He glanced at Sarek before continuing. "I believe we have all been made clear that what happens here does not leave this room. Now, I will need to meld with one of you to ascertain the strength of your link." Spock stepped forward quickly.

"I am prepared for such a meld." He said. Fer'at nodded and reached one bony hand up to Spock's face, fitting his fingers to the meld points. They both closed their eyes. For a moment, they were both perfectly still. Then they both opened their eyes and Fer'at stepped back. He looked as close to troubled as a Vulcan possibly could.

"It appears my initial assessment was incorrect. You do not possess a mere link."

"What are you saying?" Asked Sarek, sounding almost nervous. Fer'at looked at him.

"They possess a full mating bond." Jim felt like the floor was about to drop out from under his feet. Hadn't Spock told him that bonds were a lot harder to break than links? Did this mean they were stuck together? Jim looked from face to face as he tried to find one with an answer to his questions. Sarek beat him to it.

"It must be possible to have it broken. The match is unacceptable." Jim might have been insulted if it weren't for the fact that he was reeling on the inside. He was also startled by the fact that Spock suddenly stepped closer to him when his father spoke. Jim decided it was time he got them to at least acknowledge him.

"You're still letting me go home, right?" He asked, trying not to sound as nervous as he felt. All three Vulcans looked at him, clearly surprised. It was Spock however, who answered him.

"Of course, Jim." Jim turned to face him fully, and he continued. "I give you my word that no matter what complications may arise, you will not be prevented from returning home. This is not your fault and you will not be held against your will by anyone here." It might have just been Jim's imagination, but it almost looked like Spock glared at the others as if to say 'Right?'

"Of course not." Said Sarek, who seemed to be making an attempt to take control of the situation. He turned to Fer'at. "What can be done to make the breaking safe for them?" Fer'at considered the question.

"We will simply have to give the bond time to settle. Right now, Spock's sanity depends on it. I cannot say how breaking it will affect Mr. Kirk. It is certain though, that breaking it while it is so new yet so strong would have adverse side effects on them both." Spock listened to the elderly Vulcan speak, his face unreadable.

"What must we do while we wait for the bond to settle?" He asked.

"As with all new bonds, it requires close proximity. Remaining apart for too long will cause distress and discomfort. You should remain in each other's presence for long periods of time." Jim felt a wave of fear. He had planned on holing up somewhere so he could sort out his feelings on what happened and move on from it. How was he going to do that if he and Spock were constantly sharing space? Spock actually seemed to share his concern.

"How might we do that?" He asked calmly. "I have much work to finish before we reach Earth, and I doubt Jim is interested in spending the majority of his time here in the labs."

"You need not be together always." Replied the healer. Simply remaining within ten feet of each other while you sleep or take meals should be sufficient. Also, it would be best if you do not stay as far away from each other as possible, on exact ends of the ship, for example. If you do not do that, you should both be able to function without experiencing discomfort." He paused before adding, "It is typical for there to be an urge for physical contact between two new mates, as well as much telepathic contact to assist the bond in settling. However it also increases the strength of the bond and in this case, that would be detrimental to your cause. Indeed it would be for the best that you do not meld at all, or the bond may _will _even stronger." No one dared speak, and Jim was pretty sure Spock was fighting just as hard as he was not to blush uncontrollably. He couldn't help but notice that the healer had said nothing about not having any more 'physical contact.' Spock broke the tension by speaking again.

"Sleeping arrangements may present a problem. We have no single quarters left available, and I am certain Jim would prefer solitude during the journey. His privacy has been compromised more than enough." There was silence again. It seemed no one could think of an acceptable solution. Then, to Jim's surprise, the blue-eyed Vulcan, Stonn, spoke up.

"I may have a possible solution." They all looked at him, expectantly. "Spock and I were given shared quarters. Vorik, one of the other students, is alone in his quarters because his assigned roommate had a death in the family. If it is acceptable, I will move my belongings to his room and Mr. Kirk will be able to have my bed. Then he and Spock can remain close to each other for the necessary amount of time and he can do as he wishes while Spock works in the lab." For a moment, there was silence again. Then Spock looked over at Jim.

"It is up to you." He said quietly. Jim hesitated. To be sharing the small room he'd seen with this man, could that possibly be a good idea? But there would be two beds this time, and Spock seemed to be doing everything in his power to make him feel safe. He nodded.

"Okay." Spock turned back to Stonn and nodded.

"We accept your offer."

"Spock," said Sarek, sounding a little stern, "I would speak with you." Spock nodded turned to Stonn.

"Would you show Jim back to the room? I will not be long." Stonn nodded back and gestured to Jim.

"This way please." He headed for the door, Jim following slowly behind. One glance back showed Fer'at making a break for his office in order to avoid what was probably going to be a serious fight between father and son. Then the doors shut and Jim focused on following Stonn.

* * *

><p>"Spock." Said Sarek calmly. "It would be unwise to stay in such close quarters with Mr. Kirk. The temptation to meld with him, or mate with him again might be too strong for you to resist."<p>

"I am perfectly in control of myself." Said Spock coolly.

"Perhaps," replied Sarek, "but it might still be better if Kirk was assigned to another room."

"There are no private quarters available." Retorted Spock stubbornly. "I am the only person here who he is familiar with, and placing him in a room with another might be traumatic for him. We would not have to spend much time in each other's company. As I do not require as much sleep as he does, I could leave before he wakes and return after he falls asleep once more. He will be safe with me." Sarek studied him for a moment before closing his eyes in defeat.

"You are both adults, and it is clear that there is nothing I can do to change your mind. I only hope that you do not regret this decision."

"I will not." Replied Spock firmly. "I am certain of it.

* * *

><p>Jim wasn't even back at the room yet, and he was already wondering if he'd made a mistake in accepting Stonn's offer to take his bed. Would he be able to handle at most two weeks of rooming with the guy he'd slept with? What if he freaked out about something and they decided that he was too dangerous to be left alone? What if they thought he was a danger to them? Spock had said his family was powerful. Long ago on Earth, powerful families had ways of making unwanted things disappear. Would Sarek try something like that?<p>

Jim fought to repress a shudder and returned his attention to Stonn as they came to a halt in front of the entrance to the room. The door swished open and they stepped inside. Stonn quickly went about gathering his few possessions together and had them all packed neatly in a bag within minutes. Jim expected him to just leave, but he was surprised when Stonn addressed him.

"I believe that I may owe you an apology." He said quietly. Jim looked at him, startled.

"What for?" He asked. Stonn lowered his eyes for a moment before responding.

"When I became aware of Spock's condition, I was the one who suggested visiting the Pleasure Palace as a means to saving his life. I had heard it spoken of by a guest onboard and thought it to be a possible solution. I was unaware of its true background. If I had known, I would have never suggested it." For a moment, Jim could think of nothing to say. He was no expert on reading Vulcans, but it was clear that Stonn was relieved that his friend was alright. It was also clear that he felt some guilt over the means used to do so. Jim decided that just like Sarek and Spock, this guy wasn't to blame.

"I guess if you hadn't thought of it, I'd still be stuck there. And like you said, you didn't know." Jim wasn't given to big emotional speeches with strangers, but he was hoping that his words carried his forgiveness across. From the way Stonn's posture seemed to relax, they did. He began speaking again.

"Please, make yourself comfortable. The restroom and shower facilities are through that door. There is a replicator on the other side of that screen. And this," he gestured to a switch on the wall, "activates a dividing screen between the beds if you require some privacy." He turned to leave, then turned back and said, "I will leave you to settle in. I am certain Spock will be able to answer any questions or assist you in dealing with any needs you may have during the duration of the journey." With that, he turned back for the door, hopefully in time to miss the raging blush that spread across Jim's face. He couldn't have possibly meant anything lewd by that, could he?

Jim tried to push those thoughts aside as he grabbed the bag holding his toiletries and went into the bathroom to freshen up. If he kept thinking that way, it was going to be a really long two weeks.

* * *

><p>Spock returned to his room after his father left Sickbay. As he made his way there, he was already trying to figure out how to spend as little time as possible in Jim's presence. To stay too close to him would only increase the temptations his father spoke of, and he had no right to put any more stress or pressure on Jim than he already had.<p>

He opened the door to his quarters and went inside. He rounded the room divider and was stopped in his tracks by what he saw. Jim was sitting on his bed, looking like he was waiting for something. He looked up and stood when he saw Spock standing there.

"Hey." He said awkwardly. "Stonn told me to go ahead and settle in. I guess I just wanted to know if there's anything else you need to tell me?" Spock considered telling Jim that it was his bed, but banished the thought.

"There is nothing." He assured him. Telling Jim the truth about the bed would only embarrass him, knowing that he'd accidently chosen to sleep in his unexpected partner's bed. Also, the thought of Jim in _his_ bed was something of an instinctive comfort, whereas the thought of him in any other man's bed, even his honorable friend's, had quite the opposite effect. "I had thought to arrange a schedule so that we might coexist in this space more smoothly. We should choose when we will both use the bathroom facilities. Also, as I am Vulcan, I will not need to sleep as long as you and you will have the room to yourself for the most part. Not that you need to remain in this room at all times." He added rather hastily. "I simply wish to assure you that you will have privacy here. Indeed, I can attain much rest from meditation alone and can go several days without sleep." He hoped Jim would get his point, and he was surprised when Jim spoke.

"I'm not gonna kick you out of your room." He said. "I'm not gonna lie; I'm not very comfortable with this right now, but after everything that's happened, I think this shouldn't be too bad as long as we're careful and willing to compromise." Spock nodded.

"That is logical, though Vulcan custom dictates that you are my guest and therefore entitled to anything you ask of me." To his further surprise, Jim grinned.

"I'm a pretty quiet house guest. I won't step on anyone's toes or anything. I would like to move around though. Is there a gym or something on board?" Spock immediately busied himself with telling Jim about the exercise facilities on the ship, which were more for visitors since Vulcans did not need much space to perform their own physical exercises. He didn't know why he hadn't thought of it before; after being held captive in the room at the Palace, he might have felt suffocated if he stayed in these rooms for the duration of the trip.

As he described what Jim might do while he was waiting to get back to Earth, he felt a newfound sense of ease. Perhaps these next weeks would at least be bearable for them both.

* * *

><p>Stonn sat in meditating in his new quarters after completing his work in the lab. Soon, he was going to send a message to his wife before his new roommate returned. He felt rather conflicted about the issue concerning Mr. Kirk. He had participated in doing a great wrong to the man, and it was his duty to assist in making things right.<p>

But he'd seen the way Spock looked at the man, the way he tried to shield him from the gazes of others. He'd also seen something new in Spock, a contentment that seemed to be at war with apprehension. It was normal for a Vulcan to have an aversion to the breaking of a bond, no matter how incompatible they were with their mate. But something about all of this seemed…wrong.

It wasn't unheard of for two Vulcan's who had bonded in spite of being incompatible to worry over breaking it, but they did not show the kind of affection Spock already seemed to feel for his own new mate. And Kirk, in spite of being obviously afraid, had consented to mate with Spock and now showed no blame to him for what was happening. Indeed, he seemed to be quite concerned for Spock's sake as well.

Stonn's mind began to wonder a different path. Such instant compatibility between two strangers was almost unheard of. Perhaps if that was possible, it was also possible for this whole occurrence to have a positive end result. If Jim Kirk could see the merits in remaining Spock's bondmate, there would be no need for him to live in fear of what might happen when his Time came again. Spock already cared for Kirk, that much was clear. It was just a matter of making Kirk see that, and if he could care for Spock as well.

For the first eighteen years of their lives, Stonn had never liked Spock. He thought it incredibly unfair and illogical for the offspring of an wayward ambassador and a human nobody be given all the opportunities that he would have to work his whole life to earn. And to top it all off, he had T'Pring, the only person to ever catch his interest, and he did not even want her. T'Pring, in spite of feeling a connection to Stonn, had remained silent for the sake of her family's image. Stonn had not believed his life could be more incomplete.

Then, when they came of age, Spock had suddenly come forward and asked that his link with T'Pring be dissolved. His mother, Amanda, had already spoken with T'Pring's parents about linking her with Stonn. Perhaps it was his human blood that encouraged him to defy tradition in such a way, but Stonn didn't care. He had what he thought he could never obtain. He and T'Pring both ceased making derogatory remarks about Spock's heritage, for it was likely that very heritage was what allowed them to be together. Once they became civil to Spock, they came to see that he was not an undesirable person to associate with, as they'd always treated him in the past. They had become friends. Enough so that he was invited by both their families to their bonding ceremony.

It was because of Spock that Stonn had T'Pring, and because of Spock that he felt no shame in loving her. It was because of Spock that Stonn had not been forced to face his Time of need with such a great possibility of death, as he nearly had. And it was because of Spock that he was on his way to Earth ahead of the rest of his class to complete an assignment ahead of schedule so that he could be home with his wife for the birth of their first child, a daughter who he fully intended to ask Spock to sponsor. If what Spock truly wanted and needed was Jim Kirk, Stonn was going to do everything in his power to make sure he got him.

That decided, he went to his computer terminal and began composing a message to his wife. He had a feeling he was going to need all the help he could get.

* * *

><p><strong>Again, I'm so sorry about the lateness! I worked several days of irregular hours in a row, including through the time change, so I'm very tired and want very much to do nothing on my day off, but I couldn't leave this unfinished. I rushed about half of it, but I hope it's acceptable. And now for what I wanted you to stay for.<strong>

**I've got a lot of ideas for K/S stories in my head right now. I will finish this story before I begin posting anything else, but at some point I'm going to begin working on some others. Once they're far enough along, I'm going to figure out how to create a poll about them and let you all vote on which one I should focus on and start posting first. I'll be including a description of each option at some point in this story, so please keep a look-out!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry about being late! Sarek does some stuff that's not totally cool, but he's not **_**too**_** much of a jerk about it. Also, Jim gets a message and kind of snaps. But then he and Spock make a little progress.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 9<p>

Five days into their journey and Jim had barely seen or heard from Spock. Sometimes while he was sleeping he would be aware of someone moving around in the room, and in the mornings he would find notes from Spock suggesting something he might do to keep himself busy. He'd invited him to make use of the gym, the library, the observation deck, and really any part of the ship he might be interested in. He mostly kept to himself, working out to burn off all the tension that had come from being cooped up for over a week and relaxing with a downloaded book from their library. He also did research on the people he was now staying with. He learned that Spock's father, Sarek, was the Vulcan Ambassador to Earth. He mostly ate in the room, but he was considering leaving and socializing a bit. He wasn't sure just how aware the crew or other passengers were of his reasons for being here.

Spock, his father, his friend, and his doctor were probably the only ones who knew the truth, and Jim would probably need to come up with a valid-sounding reason for needing to be on their ship now.

Spock seemed to be avoiding him. Whether this was because it was necessary to help dissolve the bond or just because he was embarrassed about what had happened, Jim didn't know. Either way it was fine. He wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to Spock, let alone how to attempt it. In some ways, he was avoiding him too. He took his meals in the cabin to avoid seeing him in the Mess. He also made sure to pull the privacy screen between their beds every night before he went to sleep. It might just be for the best if they acted like what they really were; strangers.

The few Vulcan's he'd come in contact with since coming aboard were polite enough, and frankly uninterested in why he was there. That was just their way. Maybe if he talked to someone who knew about the situation. Stonn had seemed friendly enough, but he was busy like the other Vulcan students. Plus he was Spock's friend, and that meant that he might share whatever Jim told him with Spock. And really, he didn't even know the guy well enough to want to talk to him about something like that. He'd already tried talking to Fer'at. The Healer had been pretty tight-lipped about the whole situation. He'd just repeated his advice from before and suggested (sort of) that he should just be patient and let them handle everything. That could be a problem.

Jim had never been the type to not try to do his share. Maybe it came from growing up on a farm, but the need to contribute to the household (or ship, in this case) was too much a part of him to be ignored. And playing games on his padd, reading, and venting on the gym equipment were only going to keep him occupied for so long.

The sound of the computer console in the room beeping took him by surprise. He barely glanced at it, assuming the message was for Spock, then did a double take when he saw his own name flashing in the slot naming the intended recipient. He was even more surprised to see the name of the sender: Ambassador Sarek. He got up from the bed and sat down in front of the console, accepting the message. The older Vulcan's face appeared on the screen.

"Mr. Kirk." He said in greeting. "I realize this is short notice, but I had hoped you might be able to join me for the afternoon meal. There are some things I believe it would be prudent for us to discuss." To say that Jim was surprised would have been a severe understatement. He replied quickly.

"Um, sure. I can be there in fifteen minutes?" The last part was said rather uncertainly. He had no idea why Sarek wanted to speak with him. Sarek nodded in response to his question.

"That is acceptable. I trust you know where my quarters are located?" At Jim's confirmation he added, "I will be waiting."

Jim didn't really need a full fifteen minutes to get there; he just needed some time to steady himself against the surprise. What did the father of his temporary spouse want with him? He recalled what he'd thought before; Sarek was powerful. And the powerful had methods of making their troubles go away. That might or might not be the case with Sarek. Jim knew he was going to have to be careful either way.

He composed himself and made his way to the ambassadorial quarters. Whatever the Ambassador had to say, he was going to stay calm and not show any fear. However, his mind went utterly blank when he actually found himself right outside Sarek's door. He hesitated and actually considered running the other way before he sucked it up and requested entry. Sarek himself answered the door.

"Mr. Kirk." He said formally. "Please come in." Jim stepped through the doors, succeeding in not flinching when they whooshed shut behind him. Sarek led him over to a table set for two, some kind of pasta dish on the plates. "Please sit." He said, gesturing to one of the chairs. Jim sat down and Sarek took the seat opposite his. He then picked up his fork and began eating. Jim tentatively began to do the same. As they did, Sarek began to speak again.

"I would have spoken to you sooner, but I believed it would be best to give you time to adjust to being here first. I trust you have settled in comfortably?"

"Uh, yeah." Said Jim, not expecting that. "It's fine. I haven't seen much of Spock." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them. He was supposed to be staying away from Spock, and his dad of all people wouldn't want to hear the details of whatever was going on between them. Sarek seemed unfazed, however.

"He is most likely keeping busy in an attempt to ignore the bond between you. It is best at this point for you to stay away from each other, lest you feel tempted to try and strengthen the bond." Jim couldn't think of a reply to that. His mind had gone blank of all facts except for the one that Sarek thought he might want to have sex with Spock again. Sarek continued, probably oblivious to Jim's train of though.

"I realize these past weeks have been most distressing for you." He paused, and Jim could tell that he was internally searching for the most diplomatic way to word whatever he wanted to say next. "Spock has a prosperous future ahead of him. Events like what has occurred recently have the potential to ruin that future, for him and for our entire family. I believe I have several more than acceptable reasons that would convince you-"

"Stop!" Snapped Jim, finally getting his voice back. Sarek looked startled, and he pressed on. "Whatever it is you're gonna try to bribe or threaten me with, just forget it. I don't blame Spock for what happened. I don't blame him for being sick, or for needing what he did to take care of it, and I don't blame you or Stonn for coming up with the solution you did. The only people I blame for any of this are the ones who kidnapped me and locked me up in that room. I've told Spock, I've told Pike, and I've even told Stonn. And now I'm telling you; I don't plan on trying to press charges against anyone or make a big scene about any of it. All I want to get home and move on with my life!" He stopped, realizing he'd almost started shouting at a Federation ambassador, who was now staring at him with an unreadable expression. Then, after several tense seconds, Sarek nodded his head.

"You are correct. I should not have spoken to you in such a way. Please forgive me; I was only attempting to protect my son." Jim had to fight the urge to just slump over in his chair.

"I guess I don't blame you for that either." Sarek nodded again.

"I realize you must be ready to end this conversation. However, there is something else I must say to you that I would have when we first met, had I been given the opportunity. I owe you my son's life. There is a significant chance he would have rejected another person. So, as unnecessary or distasteful as you may find it, I must say…thank you. Thank you for my son." Jim was silent for a moment before he too nodded.

"Okay." He could tell that the conversation was over now. He stood up and left the room, making his way back to his quarters slowly and, when he got there, flopping down on the bed and staring blankly at the ceiling as he tried to wrap his mind around everything he'd just heard.

* * *

><p>Sarek sat at his desk looking over documents, but his mind wasn't really on them. Instead, it was focused on the young human who'd stopped him in his tracks. Kirk was sharp, there was no doubt of that. Sarek set aside his work and pulled up the files he'd found on James T. Kirk. His medical records showed no sexually transmitted diseases, but there were many injuries that took place during childhood. It was a clear sign of recklessness, or perhaps something more unsavory.<p>

Kirk, in spite of being quite the delinquent, graduated three years early from high school and had taken several college courses online, never settling on a major. He had a criminal record, mostly minor things like drunken disorderly conduct and the like. There was one file that was sealed up too tight for Sarek to access without drawing too much attention to himself, but it was likely more details about his juvenile crimes and was of no importance to him.

There was more, such as the fact that he'd inherited his family's farm after his mother's death, and that he'd lived there rather quietly ever since. There was still the occasional complaint about a fight here and an accident there, but it was nothing too serious.

If Sarek had read these files before actually meeting Kirk, he would have most likely done everything in his power to make sure his son never met him. After all, it would not do to have the son of a Federation ambassador associating with young criminals. But after meeting Kirk, he found himself unable to judge the young man's character based solely on the information he'd gathered. He'd successfully deduced that Sarek was about to try to say or do something to convince or threaten him into not pressing any charges against Spock and himself. Truthfully, Sarek had arguments prepared for both. However, Kirk had proved to be more logical than he had anticipated. He was placing blame where it was due, not holding any of them responsible for what was happening to him now. This made Sarek reconsider his assessment of him.

T'Pring had been an ideal choice for a wife, as far as Vulcan standards went. She had a brilliant mind, a successful career in biology, and was perfectly poised and logical. However, she had mentally rejected Spock, partially out of prejudicial reasons. And even though they were on friendly terms now, she had grown up as many children of high class had, to be rather dependent on others, and she simply lacked an inner element that called out to Spock in a compatible way.

Jim Kirk was quite different. He was outspoken, brash, and seemed to have a significant problem with authority. However, he lived alone on his farm, maintaining it quite well from what his research had shown. Indeed, Kirk had been emancipated at the age of sixteen. That showed independence and self-sufficiency. He'd graduated years ahead of his age-mates, and even deduced Sarek's intentions before he could speak them aloud, showing an obviously sharp mind, and quick wit at least by human standards. His words to Sarek showed honesty, straightforwardness, and a certain fearlessness. His unwillingness to blame anyone aside from those responsible for his incarceration, in spite of any trauma showed strong logic. And most importantly, he'd consented to be Spock's mate, if only for a short time. That act alone showed compassion, open-mindedness, kindness, generosity, and courage, great courage. And for Spock to have shown such an instant attraction to him, even through a camera, was a sign of sure compatibility.

There was a part of Sarek, more of one than he would have liked to admit, that felt that while it was of the utmost importance to respect Mr. Kirk's right to have the bond dissolved, it was rather a shame to let such compatibility to slip away.

* * *

><p>Jim was reading again. His mind wasn't really on the book though. He was thinking about what Sarek had said hours ago, or been about to say. He wondered just how involved Spock had been in their discussion. Did he know that Sarek was about to try to bribe or blackmail him into keeping quiet? In spite of everything that had happened, and how little he actually knew about Spock, his opinion of him was a rather positive one. But if Spock thought that little of him…What was he thinking? He shouldn't care what some guy he didn't know thought of him.<p>

As he was trying to sort out his current emotional crisis concerning his 'husband', the console beeped again. He glanced at it, wondering if Sarek had decided to bribe and/or threaten him after all. However, the caller I.D. said it was coming from a Dr. Lisa Marks. Surprised, he sat in front of the console and accepted the call. A pleasant and rather harmless looking woman appeared on the screen before him. Her warm green eyes and friendly smile were extremely disarming.

"James Kirk?" She asked, her voice just as pleasant as her expression. Jim nodded.

"Yeah, that's me. What can I do for you?"

"My name is Lisa Marks. I'm a Starfleet Trauma Counselor. I was given your case by Captain Christopher Pike. He said that part of the conditions for you to be traveling with the people you are is that you speak with me." Vaguely Jim recalled Pike mentioning that he needed to speak with a counselor, and Spock telling Pike that he could do so while on the ship. The way he was feeling right now, he was willing to talk to a shrink if it might help make things seem a little better.

"Yeah, I remember. So how does this work?" He hadn't talked to a counselor in years and he wasn't sure how to proceed. All he knew was that she was going to make an assessment of him based on their conversation, and he wanted it to be good. Otherwise he could wind up being prescribed a bunch of unnecessary medications or even being confined to some facility until they deemed him 'healthy' again. She gave him what seemed like an indulgent smile.

"I suppose we'll start with the obvious question; how do you feel?" Jim shrugged.

"I'm alright. I'm just trying to keep myself occupied until I get home." Dr. Marks nodded.

"That's good. Keeping busy can lessen the strain of a traumatic event." Jim frowned.

"It wasn't all that traumatic. I mean, they explained everything to me, and I think I understood it for the most part. Everybody here's pretty…civil." Calling them 'friendly' might have been pushing it, but he felt he was alright here. Dr. Marks didn't seem so convinced.

"It's possible that you're simply experiencing a delayed reaction to the trauma you suffered. It's perfectly understandable. The extended presence of the man who assaulted you, as well as others like him-"

"Whoa," said Jim, cutting her off, "I wasn't assaulted." She frowned a little.

This man you're traveling with forced a sexual encounter between the two of you, didn't he? I understand that it can be confusing, especially if he was kind to you afterwards, but-"

"'But' nothing!" Snapped Jim, cutting her off for the second time. "I'm getting sick of explaining this. I wasn't raped. I don't hold him or anyone else here responsible for what happened. Maybe it even started out as an assault, but he stopped when I told him to and I chose to continue it. I've already explained that to Pike!"

"He informed me of this." Said Dr. Marks solemnly. "As I said, he may have behaved in a way that was harmless and kind to you and caused you to enjoy it rather than simply hurting you, or maybe you even tried to ingratiate yourself to him by giving him what he wanted before he could try to hurt you. Or perhaps you want so badly to feel safe and unharmed that you've convinced yourself of the things you've told me. There's are conditions that match the description of what you're feeling, when captives begin to believe that they genuinely care for their captors or abusers-"

"I know what Stockholm Syndrome is, and I know I don't have it!" Snarled Jim, not letting her go any further. "Nothing you say is going to change my mind or help me in any way. You can tell Pike if he wants me to try and drag them to court, it's not going to happen. Or if he really wants to be of help to me, to find someone who'll do more than try to fit me to some textbook explanation!" With that, he terminated the call, feeling just a hint of smugness under all his anger as he watched Dr. Mark's face contort in surprise right before the screen went black. Fuming, he turned back to the bed and flopped down on it. So much for talking to make him feel better.

* * *

><p>Spock returned from the lab a little earlier than usual that evening. Based on the fact that Jim seemed to already be in a deep sleep by his usual return time, he did not think it would be a problem. But as he stepped past the screen into the 'bedroom' area, he saw that Jim was still awake and staring up at the ceiling. Not wanting to startle him, Spock cleared his throat to announce his presence. Jim's eyes moved over to him and he sat up abruptly.<p>

"Hey." He muttered, his voice a little hoarse. Spock nodded in reply.

"I apologize for the disturbance." He said. "I believed you would be asleep by now." Jim glanced at the chronometer on the wall.

"Yeah, I should be. I just had a lot on my mind." He replied." Spock sat down on his (Stonn's) bed.

"Is something troubling you?" Jim was clearly hesitant, but he answered.

"Your dad invited me to his quarters for a little chat. He told me that it would be really bad for you if I were to ever tell anyone about what happened, or if I put it in a more negative light." Spock was stunned for a moment before he found his voice again.

"Did he threaten you?" He managed to ask. Jim shook his head.

"No, he just suggested that it'd be in my best interest to keep quiet." Jim paused and a tiny smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "Actually, he didn't even get that far. I kind of cut him off before he could actually say anything." If Spock had not been so angry, he might have been amused trying to picture his father, one of the most stern and forbidding figures he'd ever known being cut off in mid sentence by an angry young human.

"I assure you, I had nothing to do with his actions." He said, hoping that Jim believed him. "I would not threaten someone for something that was completely out of their control. Nor would I attempt to interfere with their rights to suit my own needs." Jim looked him in the eye.

"I believe you." Spock felt himself relax marginally. It was a shock what a relief those words were to him.

"I am truly sorry my father spoke to you in such a way." Jim shrugged.

"He already apologized. It's over and done with, no need to make a big deal out of it."

"Very well." Said Spock, sensing that Jim did not wish to discuss it further. However he was already planning a visit to his father's quarters in the very near future. A rather awkward silence descended on the room. For a moment, both of them sat there, neither knowing what to say. Then Jim broke it.

"I've been trying to learn what I can about all this bonding stuff. I know you already told me a lot, but I wanted to see if there was any more. I tried talking to the Healer guy, but all he did was repeat what he said before and tell me that you guys would handle everything. The computer doesn't seem to know much either." Jim paused. "I know you said this stuff is all really private; I was just curious." Spock felt a pang of sympathy. Jim was in a very strange situation; it was actually a very intelligent move to try and gather all of the information that he could on it. And he deserved some reassurance.

"As you said, we are very private, especially about these particular subjects, sometimes even with those involved who have more right to know than anyone. However, Healer Fer'at did not tell you anything for certain reasons. First, he is aware I have already told you much about it. Second, he most likely believes that our ways are so foreign to you, you would not understand his explanation very well. And lastly, as it was I who did this wrong against you, it is my responsibility to see to your well-being and make sure you have all that you need, including answers."

"Oh." Said Jim, looking surprised. "Well, we hardly ever see each other, so I didn't think I'd be able to get much from you." Spock felt another pang, and this time it was shame. He should have made himself available to accommodate Jim. It was his duty after all.

"I am here now." He offered. "Is there anything you wish to discuss?" Jim shook his head.

"No, I can't really think straight right now."

"Were you very upset by my father's words?" Asked Spock, concerned. Jim shook his head again.

"No. I mean, I was, but I understood why he was doing it. You remember telling Pike that he could have a shrink talk to me here on the ship?" Spock nodded. "I was contacted by one after I got back here, and she kept trying to convince me that I was in denial, that I was some abuse victim who got attached to his abuser. It was like she wanted me to be hurt because that was what she believed and was ready to deal with. Or wanted me to accuse you guys of doing something illegal. I told her she was wrong about all of it and cut her off." Spock felt a surge of warmth. It was always a comfort to have the loyalty of one's mate assured, even if it was just temporary in this case. It was also one more reassurance that Jim did not blame him for any of what happened.

"I am sorry she upset you. However, I am grateful that you defended us against her accusations." He felt rewarded when Jim gave him a little smile.

"Well, you're welcome." They sat in silence again, no longer awkward. Then, Spock stood up.

"If you will excuse me, there is something I must see to. I will try not to wake you if you are asleep when I return."

"Okay." Said Jim, looking surprised. "Bye."

* * *

><p>Spock strode down the corridor to his father's quarters. His anger was fully back by the time he reached the right door. He buzzed for entry and was met by the sight of Sarek in mediation robes. He stepped inside without waiting for an invitation.<p>

"Jim told me that you spoke to him today." He said, not waiting for his elder to speak as was customary for Vulcan's. You should not have tried to threaten him. He has already shown himself to be reasonable, as well as a good judge of character. He deserves better than your attempt at buying him off."

"I am well aware of that." Replied Sarek stiffly. "I have already apologized and explained myself to him."

"He told me that as well." Said Spock. "But that does not change the fact that it should not have happened in the first place."

"You are correct." Admitted Sarek. "Is that all you came here to say?"

"Indeed." Said Spock. "I will bid you goodnight now." Sarek nodded in reply and Spock left. He felt a little foolish now for confronting Sarek on something that was already resolved, but he would _not_ feel sorry for defending Jim.

When he arrived back at his quarters, he saw that Jim was already fast asleep. However, he'd forgotten to pull the dividing screen between the beds. Spock moved toward it, then paused. Jim was asleep, so it would not matter if the screen was out or not. As long as he remembered to pull it before he left, allowing Jim the sense of security it provided, everything would be fine. Spock found himself feeling the need to watch over him quite strongly. So he simply prepared for bed and lay awake for a few hours, just watching Jim's sleeping face.

* * *

><p>Pike sat before his personal console in his quarters. He'd just received a message from Dr. Lisa Marks stating that her initial session with Jim Kirk had not gone well. He'd had a bad feeling from the start about that. Jim had a big personality. He probably needed help from someone with an equally big personality. Then he had an idea.<p>

There was a cadet at the Academy who was already a medical doctor for humans, but was studying Xenobiology in order to become and officer. He was also taking the opportunity to get a degree in Psychology, as such responsibilities often fell to Starfleet doctors. Pike had met the man a couple of times, and while he was incredibly gruff, he seemed to have a good track record with patients. This could be a good opportunity for everyone. He immediately began patching himself through to Starfleet Academy. After making all the right connections, he finally got a response.

"What?" Came a sleepy growl from somewhere on campus.

"Doctor McCoy? This is Captain Pike. I have a favor to ask you that I think you'll be interested in hearing about."

* * *

><p><strong>I can't say how sorry I am for how late this is. Work has kept me so busy that I haven't had time to deal with home stuff, and that just got out of control. I wish I could say it won't happen again, but I'm afraid I can't. But I can promise I won't give up on this story.<strong>

**Another reason for the lateness is the fact that I added the stuff about Fer'at and Spock's duty to answer Jim's questions. I added this because a reader left me a review stating that it didn't make a lot of sense for the doctor offer as little explanation as he did. The reason I did that was because Vulcans are extremely private, and also because Spock told Jim all kinds of stuff in previous chapters and I really didn't feel like typing it all again.**

**Until next time!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Guess what? It's that time of the week again! Back on track, at least for the moment!**

**Some of you are wondering when Jim and Spock will get together again, and I'll tell you right now; it'll be a while. Today, Jim will get another call, and he and Spock will begin to learn about each other.**

* * *

><p>Chapter 10<p>

Spock woke hours before he knew Jim would. For a moment, he once again contented himself just watching the younger man sleep. Then he rose and began preparing for his day. He did all of this quietly as usual, so as not to disturb his sleeping roommate. Once he was fully dressed he headed out to the lab. He had time to check on things in the lab before heading to the Mess for breakfast. He dressed himself in the bathroom (a habit he'd taken up so as not to alarm Jim in case he awoke to the sight of Spock removing his clothes) and fixed his hair. Then he spared one last glance for Jim before leaving to go to the lab. It wasn't until he was already finished there and standing before a replicator in the Mess that he realized he'd forgotten to pull the privacy screen out before he left.

Jim woke earlier than usual feeling a little like something was off. He wasn't sure why; he usually only felt that way when he was in unfamiliar surroundings. True, this was a different place, but he'd gotten used to it pretty quickly. Then he noticed that the dividing screen between the two beds was still in the wall instead of pulled between the beds. Sitting up, he realized that he'd forgotten to pull it shut last night and it had remained that way. And Spock apparently had not seen fit to close it.

The thought of Spock being able to see him while he slept, of being able to look over and see him in such a completely vulnerable position…had absolutely no effect on Jim. He realized with a start that he had no problem with Spock sleeping across from him without any kind of barrier between them. For God's sake, Spock had rescued him from spending perhaps the rest of his life as a sex slave. Just because they'd had sex, it didn't mean he should treat the man like a reminder of some horrific memory. He'd interacted with plenty of women he'd slept with without any awkwardness. True, the situation with Spock was a little different. It had been his first time with a guy, and the situation had been somewhat forced, but that was beyond both their control. It was like a drunken one night stand or something. Yes, there was some regret for what had happened, but it couldn't be changed. And it just wasn't anyone's fault. He realized that by avoiding Spock, he'd been treating him a bit like the rapist people seemed to want Jim to call him.

Jim made a decision and stood up. First, he was going to get dressed and have some breakfast. Then, he was going to keep himself busy until Spock returned. And when he did, he was going to find some way to let him know, once and for all, that there were no hard feelings.

When Jim got to the Mess, he was startled to find that Spock was there, just about to sit down at an empty table. As if he could sense Jim's presence (he probably could) his eyes swept across the room until they landed on Jim. Jim raised a hand hesitantly in greeting, then began to walk over to the table.

"Hey." He said when he got there. "Mind if I join you?"

"Of course not." Replied Spock. "Do you wish to make use of the replicator?"

"Yeah." Said Jim. He looked over at it. It looked pretty advanced compared to the one in his kitchen, not that he even used it that often. "It might take me a minute to figure it out. Mine's pretty old compared to that."

"I can show you how to use it." Assured Spock. He stood up and Jim followed him over to it. It was easy enough to figure out. Jim almost tried to order a dish with meat in it (they were available since there were more than just Vulcans aboard) but then realized Spock might not enjoy the smell of it so close to him and ended up choosing a simple breakfast of oatmeal and toast. If Spock was at all surprised by his choice, he didn't say anything.

Once Jim had his tray, they went back to the table where Spock's breakfast was waiting. They both began to eat. There wasn't any talking at first, but Jim wasn't too uncomfortable. It was certainly less awkward than eating Ferengi slave's food on the bed you'd just fucked in. Then, Jim glanced up at Spock just in time to see his tongue dart out to capture a stray drop of juice. Perhaps his previous train of thought was to blame, but his mind suddenly flashed back to the room, when Spock was on top of him, mapping out his body with that very tongue, tasting his throat, his chest, his cock…Jim shook his head, feeling his face heating up as said cock stirred in his jeans at the memory of that hot tongue. Why was he thinking about this now? Seeing the rapid movement, Spock raised his eyes from his food.

"Are you alright?" He asked, looking curious. Jim nearly panicked. He couldn't let Spock know he was getting turned on by memories of what they'd done while they were eating together in public!

"Fine, I just felt something on my face. Probably just a stray hair." Jim said, praying that Spock would buy it. He must have, because he just nodded and returned to his breakfast. Jim frantically tried to think of something to dispel his sudden arousal.

"So, you got a lot of stuff to work on today?" He asked, hoping he sounded casual. Spock nodded.

"Indeed. I am assisting Stonn on a botanical project of his. He is attempting to cross breeds of plants from vastly different environments in order for them to thrive there. A plant from a world with a very warm climate like Vulcan would not survive the coolness and humidity on Earth. However, combining their DNA with Earth plants may make it possible to grow them there. It is a long process. First we must work with plants that are at least somewhat similar to the ones on Vulcan."

"You mean desert plants, like cacti?" Asked Jim, genuinely curious now. Spock looked surprised.

"Yes. As Earth has some desert climates, though nowhere near as hot and dry as Vulcan, there are some similarities in the plant life. Stonn also hopes to accomplish the same goal with edible plants for the purpose of creating ones that will be able to grow on the various worlds chosen for colonization." Jim's almost enthusiastic curiosity faded instantly. He couldn't talk about this anymore.

"Oh, well, that all sounds really interesting." He knew the tone he had; the kind people used when they didn't understand something that was being explained to them, meant to brush off any further discussion. Spock seemed to get it, even if he also seemed a little confused by Jim's sudden lack of interest.

"Stonn was supposed to meet me here this morning to discuss his new results I checked in the lab before I came here."

"Maybe he went straight to the lab." Suggested Jim.

"I suppose it is possible." Replied Jim. Neither one of them saw Stonn walk into the Mess, take in the sight of them sitting together, and quietly back out before he could be seen. They finished their meal in peace.

* * *

><p>After breakfast, Jim went to the gym and did some morning exercises. Then he went back to the room to read some more. There wasn't much else to do. He left briefly to get other meals, but he didn't see Spock again. He never saw many Vulcans in the Mess. He vaguely recalled something about them not needing to eat as much as humans, so they probably didn't need the same meals per day. They also didn't sleep as much, explaining Spock's absence both when Jim fell asleep and woke up.<p>

As Jim was pondering what he might do next, his console beeped. He got up and walked over to it. The name Dr. Leonard McCoy flashed in the sender blank. Jim felt a wave of irritation. Were they really trying this again? He opted to answer the message, if only to tell this new doctor off. He hit accept. Immediately, a rather gruff looking face appeared on his screen. He was quite the opposite of the doctor who'd called the day before. She had been tidy and harmless looking. This guy though, Jim would have expected to meet someone like him in a bar, not a therapy office.

"Jim Kirk?" He asked, his voice just as gruff as his face.

"Yeah." Said Jim, almost warily. "What do you want?"

"Christopher Pike contacted me after you scared away the first lady he picked to talk to you." Said the man bluntly with a strong southern drawl. "He seemed to think I'd have better luck with you. Not sure why. This isn't the kind of trauma I've really trained to deal with." Jim already liked him better than Dr. Marks.

"Me neither. I don't think I even need a shrink." McCoy shrugged.

"Oh well, since you've got me, we might as well talk about something. How 'bout why your session with Marks lasted less than fifteen minutes." Jim scowled.

"I assume Pike told you that I was being held in a brothel." At McCoy's nod, he continued. "This guy came in for sex, and when he found out I wasn't there willingly, he and his people got help from Starfleet, and now he's taking me home. They think that I couldn't have possibly consented to have sex with him, so they keep trying to convince me that I made a mistake accepting his offer and that eventually I'm going to realize that I was raped and flip out." His scowl deepened. "I _wasn't_ raped." McCoy looked thoughtful now.

"I have to admit, it's understandable to jump to rape if the guy had sex with you _before _helping you escape." Jim shook his head.

"I didn't say anything until after. He wasn't…he wasn't in his right mind. He _had_ to have sex with me or…" he stopped speaking. Spock had told him that this was pretty much the most private thing in their entire culture.

"Or what?" Prompted McCoy. Jim sighed.

"Look, a lot of this is really private to them, and I promised I'd keep a lot of it to myself. Let's just say, he had to have sex with me, and he couldn't do it unless I consented. I mean, he literally begged me, and he didn't actually do anything until I said yes. And, he was really considerate about the whole thing, especially given what state he was in. I mean, I admit I was scared. It was…" he paused before continuing, "it was my first time with a guy, and I didn't know him, but I wasn't afraid of him. He's a good guy, and he doesn't deserve to have me freak out on him and accuse him of something that didn't really happen." McCoy was silent for a moment, looking thoughtful.

"It sounds like you really mean that."

"I do." Said Jim. "Because it's the _truth_."

"Alright." Said McCoy. "But is it at all stressful being around him after what happened?" Jim shrugged.

"A little bit. He seems to think that he deserves some blame for what happened. But I don't, so he's not getting it. Still, it makes it a little awkward to talk to him."

"You said it was your first time with a man. Have you suffered any feelings of emasculation as a result of this?" Asked McCoy, changing the subject a bit. Jim shook his head.

"No. I'm bisexual; I've known that for a long time. But I'd never had sex with a man before that, and being in unfamiliar territory like that caught me off guard a bit. But I'm okay with it. I don't feel any guilt for allowing it to happen, or how I responded to it." McCoy stared at him for a while before sitting back in his seat.

"You really seem to be okay." He said, sounding surprised. Jim grinned a bit.

"Yeah well, you did pretty good too, acting like you really didn't think you could get me to talk." McCoy looked even more surprised, but there was a bit of respect there now.

"You caught onto me, huh?" Jim smirked.

"I may not have a doctorate, but I'm not stupid. Reverse psychology is like, the oldest trick in the book."

"Good one, kid." Conceded McCoy. "Though it wasn't all a trick. This really isn't my specialty. I'm a medical doctor. I'm getting a psych degree now since the mental care of a starship crew tends to fall to the ship's CMO." Jim looked a little insulted.

"They gave my case to a _Cadet_? Jeez, I think I'm a little insulted." McCoy gave a grin and an unapologetic shrug.

"You had the last one practically in tears, according to Pike. He wanted to try sending someone with a thicker skin." He paused for a moment. "He also wants us to talk again, regularly. Maybe you don't have any issues about what happened, but it might still be good to talk about it." Jim thought about it for a moment.

"Alright." He said finally. "We'll talk again."

* * *

><p>After cutting the connection with McCoy, Jim decided to wait up. He wanted to talk to Spock about the bonding some more. Talking to McCoy about what had led them to it made him want to know more. He understood almost everything except for one thing; how was it that it was so easy for them to fully bond? He'd said there usually had to be steps taken in advance before it happened. He'd also said he wasn't sure about much where their bond was concerned, but maybe he'd thought of something by now.<p>

Finally, Spock arrived back at their quarters. He seemed a little surprised by the fact that Jim was once again awake when he returned.

"Is everything alright?" He asked again, looking a little concerned.

"Fine." Said Jim. "I got a call from a new doctor today, and this one was a little more open minded. I'll be talking to him again."

"That is good to hear." Replied Spock. He seemed to mean it too, like he trusted Jim to not say anything embarrassing or incriminating about him. Jim decided to press on.

"I was wondering, if you'd be okay with it, if we could talk about the bond some more. I don't know if you've thought about it much lately, but I still can't think of why we're so connected when most people have to go through all that re-bonding stuff you talked about."

"I am afraid I still have no answers for you." Said Spock, sounding regretful. "It is practically unheard of for two minds to so drawn to each other when the pair have never even laid eyes on each other. As I said, I felt drawn to you when I saw you on that monitor screen, but unless we somehow had a pre-existing connection from before that day, I cannot explain why I felt such need for you." Jim sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. Then he chuckled.

"What do you find amusing?" Spock asked curiously. Jim shrugged.

"I was just thinking about what people back in Riverside would say if they knew what was going on here. How they'd react if they found out that George Kirk's wayward son was married to a Vulcan because of what may as well have been 'love at first sight'." Spock looked startled.

"George Samuel Kirk, the Starfleet officer? He was your father?" Now Jim was surprised.

"Yeah." He said, not quite sure where this was headed. "Didn't you know that?"

"I did not." Replied Spock.

"You didn't have me checked out or anything after you brought me on board?" Asked Jim. "Cuz, I kind of did that with you and your dad."

"You were in an unfamiliar environment with unfamiliar people." Replied Spock calmly. "You needed to assess your situation and determine if there were any threats to your well-being. I already knew you were not a threat, though my father may have done some research on you." Jim shrugged.

"Okay, but didn't you see any of that stuff either of the times you melded with me?" Spock shook his head.

"The first time was to create the bond. My mind was too focused on bringing ours together for any thoughts or memories to actually be exchanged. And I melded with you the second time in order to learn why you asked me for help in leaving the facility, and nothing else."

"Oh." Said Jim. "Well, yeah, George Kirk was my dad. That doesn't really have anything to do with this."

"But it does." Insisted Spock. "We may have a pre-existing connection after all."

"How?" Asked Jim.

"I was two years old when the Kelvin Disaster took place." Began Spock. "There was a memorial service for all the victims, and a separate one for your father, due to his part in the survival of the majority of the crew. It was broadcasted over the HoloNet. I came into the room where my mother was watching it and saw her crying. I found this quite disturbing, as it was out of character for her. I asked her why she was crying, and she drew my attention to the screen."

"She tell you that a brave Starfleet officer was tragically killed while performing heroic actions?" Asked Jim a little sarcastically. That was pretty much all anyone ever had to say about his father. And how little he'd turned out to be like him.

"No." Replied Spock. "She might have, if she had thought that I would have found a great tragedy in that. A life in Starfleet can be an extremely dangerous one, and the death of an officer, while regrettable, is not a surprising occurrence. It may sound callous, but it is true."

"So what did she say?" Asked Jim, confused now.

"She pointed to a young woman with two children, one perhaps four or five Earth years of age, and a baby that could not have been more than three weeks old, rather small. She pointed to the two children and said to me, 'You see those two little boys? Their sa-mekh died'." Seeing Jim's confusion, he added, "Sa-mekh means father."

"Oh." Said Jim, feeling a lump rising in his throat. "Why would she say it like that?"

"As I said, she likely knew I would not see much of a personal tragedy in the loss of a Starfleet officer. But the loss of a father, an irreplaceable member of a family, was a far more tragic way to view it. A child old enough to understand the negative emotions involved in losing a parent would be more likely to be moved by someone else losing one." Explained Spock. Jim cleared his throat.

"I still don't see what that has to do with us bonding so easily."

"I recall being very focused on the baby I saw on the screen. It was you. I did not know why I was so interested in watching you. The broadcast ended and I went back to my studies. I did not give it much thought afterward, as it seemed quite illogical. But it is possible that it made you familiar enough to me to allow me to bond us so easily."

"Jeez." Said Jim, slumping slightly. "That's a weird coincidence." He looked at Spock again.

"Do you think…Should we tell the others about this?" Maybe it was his imagination, but Spock appeared to hesitate for a moment.

"I do not see the need to. It would not alter their advice in any way. If you are uncomfortable with the idea of sharing that information, we may simply keep it between us." Jim thought about it, then nodded.

"Okay." Then they settled in for the night. Spock offered to let Jim use the facilities first, and he accepted. Once he came out clad in his sleepwear and Spock stepped into the bathroom, Jim settled into bed. After only a moment's hesitation, he left the screen where it was; pulled back into the wall.

* * *

><p>Spock wasn't sure what to do. He'd just lied to Jim. While it was true that it wasn't really necessary to share that information with Sarek and Fer'at, it might have been a smart move. He wasn't sure why he didn't want to share details with them, other than perhaps the need for privacy and discretion that had been drilled into him for as long as he could remember. And also, the look in Jim's eyes when he'd repeated his mother's words…it was so devastatingly exposed. He could not repeat such an experience in front of an impersonal healer or his stern father.<p>

He had meant it when he said he was glad Jim had found his new doctor tolerable. Jim had adjusted quite well to staying in close quarters with Spock, and there seemed to be no ill effects from their unplanned mating and bonding. But his reaction to Spock's story made him wonder just what he might actually be hurting from. Talking to this doctor might be good for him.

As Spock finished preparing for bed, he stepped back out of the bathroom and found Jim already asleep. The screen was still in the wall. He quickly calculated the probability that Jim had forgotten it again and found it to be very low. He realized that Jim might be making a statement, that he was no longer uncomfortable with the idea of there being no barrier cutting off his vision. The thought was oddly warming. Spock settled down into his (Stonn's) bed and watched Jim sleep until he too drifted off.

* * *

><p>Three more days went by in quick succession. They were less than a week away from Earth and Spock could tell Jim was getting anxious about getting off the ship and being so close to his own home again. He was sitting on Stonn's bed going through some old files on his personal padd, deleting or saving them as he went. Then he found it. The footage of his Pon Farr with Jim.<p>

He stood there, frozen and uncertain. In his focus to make Jim feel safe and comfortable on the ship and in his presence, he'd forgotten that he'd saved a copy of the files before deleting them as he'd promised. He was still uncertain as to what exactly had taken place between them for the majority of the Fever. He knew it would probably embarrass Jim if he asked him outright for those details, but it would help him know how would be best to treat his mate as well as put his mind at ease to know what exactly had happened. He looked over toward the door.

Jim was out exercising. He had been gone for an hour, and would likely be gone for at least another. Spock slowly selected 'open'. He quickly turned the volume down as low as possible without actually muting it. Then he pushed 'play'.

For several minutes, all he saw was footage of Jim doing various things in the room; eating, sleeping, getting up to use the facilities, and reading from a padd. Nothing suspicious at all, nothing to lead someone to believe that he might be held there against his will. Then he saw Jim looking up as a deranged image of himself came flying into the picture and pinned him down to the bed.

Part of him was mortified by his own actions and wanted nothing more than to purge the files completely, but another was too curious, to _aroused_, to stop the file. He watched as the two figures on the screen struggled, as Jim shouted at him to stop, and as he collapsed and wept and pleaded like a child beseeching an adult to make the hurt stop. He couldn't see the look on Jim's face as he gave his reluctant permission. All he saw was them both removing their clothing before he was back on top of Jim, their brief exchange of names, and eventually, his turning Jim onto his stomach so that he could ready him for penetration.

Again, while part of him felt shocked and ashamed, he could not bring himself to look away as his recorded self mated with Jim. If anything, he wished he could insert himself into the recording and be with Jim again, his awareness fully intact. It wasn't until Jim was on his back again and they'd melded that he realized that Jim was in pain from mating with him. While there had been some encouragement before, all he heard now were inarticulate cries that could mean anything. He recalled how Jim had been forced to crawl his way to the bathroom afterward and felt a fresh wave of shame at the contentment he felt in his presence and the arousal he felt now watching their mating.

With serious effort, he managed to skip the video ahead to the point where his hand finally left Jim's face. He watched their final copulation with mixed feelings. He had some vague memory of this part, but it was still very unclear. Finally, it was over. He watched as his video self looked down at Jim and then, very slowly, pressed a kiss to his lips. To his great shock, Jim's hand reached up to touch his face as he reciprocated. Spock pressed a hand to his cheek where Jim had touched him, then let his fingers drift over his lips. As their video selves fell asleep together, the door to their quarters whooshed open and the real Jim Kirk walked in. Spock quickly shut off the entire padd and focused on putting a stop to his arousal.

"Hey." Said Jim, coming around the screen. "I really worked up a sweat, so I'm just gonna grab a quick shower."

"Of course." Said Spock, not trusting himself to say more than that. If he continued to speak he might find himself begging Jim to let him accompany him. He did the best he could to center his mind while Jim washed himself. However, once he had his arousal under control, he couldn't stop thinking about how much pain Jim had been in after he'd awoken. He also remembered what he knew about human physiology, forced orgasms and unwanted stimulation. He recalled what he'd seen in Jim's mind, about how he'd never been sexually intimate with a male before, and how emasculating such a thing could be when forced on a man. The only way he would know for sure if Jim was truly alright after such an experience would be to meld with him again or ask him. Since more contact between their minds wasn't an option, he would have to ask him. He knew that Jim would probably not welcome his questions, but he had to ask them. When Jim emerged from the shower washed, dried, and clad in his sleepwear, he walked over to the replicator.

"I'm gonna get some juice, you want anything?"

"Mint tea, please." Said Spock, trying to figure out how to word his question.

"Coming right up." Said Jim, actually sounding cheerful. As their beverages were finished and Jim handed him his mug, Spock took the opportunity.

"Jim, may I ask you something personal?" Jim looked surprised, but he nodded his assent. "I know that I was…rough with you." Spock felt his blush answering the one spreading across Jim's face at the mention of their mating. "I also know that you were never intimate with a male before me. It was something I detected in your mind when I melded with you the second time. I only wish to know…was if what I did to you was truly harmful to you in any psychological way? I know any physical damage is repaired, but mental wounds are a serious issue, especially to a telepathic species." Jim clearly thought about his answer before he gave it.

"McCoy, the new doctor they sent me, he asked me if I felt emasculated or anything by what happened. I don't. I've known I'm bisexual pretty much since puberty. I was just never with a guy before now. I'm not saying I was a virgin or anything, I've been with plenty of women, but I'd never done anything like that. It's something I always figured I'd try someday, but I guess I just never had anyone I liked or trusted enough for it. And I had…some other reasons to put it off." Spock didn't even care that Jim was talking about being with someone else. He was elated to hear that Jim was truly not traumatized by his actions. It was one thing to accept that something was not someone's fault. It was another entirely to not be negatively affected by it. Then the rest of Jim's words sank in. Spock had forced him to give up something he would have normally not been willing to.

"You…had no one you would consider?" He asked, not sure where to begin his apology. Jim, seemingly oblivious to his turmoil, just shrugged.

"Not really. I don't even have that many guys I just hang out with." He studied Spock. "What about you? Have you always known you were into guys?" Spock shifted a little uncomfortably.

"Vulcan's prize mental compatibility above all else, though we are not unaffected by physical beauty. I could have just as easily mated with a female." He paused and added, "It was a new experience for me as well." Jim looked interested now.

"Yeah? It was your first time with a guy too?" Spock shook his head.

"It was simply my first time." Jim's eyes widened. He was silent for a moment, and when he spoke again, Spock was caught off guard by his words.

"Oh man, I'm sorry."

"For what?" Asked Spock, startled.

"For…your first time should be with someone you care about, or at least someone you already know, not some hooker your dad paid for." If Spock were human, he might have shrugged.

"It is in the Vulcan mindset to accept what is as it is. I would have died otherwise. It would have been a more than acceptable exchange. And besides, my first time was not with 'some hooker' as you put it; it was with you." To his surprise, Jim blushed again.

"Yeah, but you didn't know that then."

"Still, it is the truth." There was silence again. Jim was the first to break it.

"I don't think I've ever been anyone's first before." He shook his head. "At least I wasn't a total virgin." He cocked his head to the side. "Hey, if it was your first time, how'd you know what to do? I know with guys it takes a little more…work before you can do anything." Spock felt his own blush return.

"As I am half human, my curiosity is not always as controllable as it should be. During my adolescence, I engaged in a great deal of…research through use of a private comm setup." To his great surprise, Jim laughed, the first real, loud laugh he'd heard from the man.

"If it helps, I'm pretty sure that kind of 'research' is something pretty much every young human male does once he gets to that age. I know I did. My mom's content blockers were a joke."

"Indeed." Murmured Spock, embarrassed but happy that Jim no longer seemed insecure. Jim held up his glass.

"Well hey, here's to first times. They hardly ever go like you expect them to."

"Based on my own experience, I can most definitely agree." Said Spock, raising his mug and finishing the playful toast. They finished their drinks in silence.

"Well," said Jim, "I think I'll go to sleep now."

"As will I." Agreed Spock. "I must prepare first." He went into the bathroom to prepare for bed. When he came back out, Jim was already sleeping, and the screen was still pulled back. Spock lay down and stared at his mate in the other bed, knowing that if he had been human, he would have smiled.

* * *

><p><strong>I bet a lot of you are wondering just what Jim's reasons for holding off on sleeping with a guy were. Well, you won't know for at least a week. I promise you it is coming though. Good reviews give me inspiration. I'm serious, after the first few came in for chapter nine, I wrote about half this chapter in a day. But then it turned out longer than I planned, and my inspiration started to flag again. But at least you got it on time!<strong>

**Until the next one. Jim and Spock will begin to exchange more personal information, maybe even some really important stuff.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry I'm a little late, but at least I got it posted! We've got some drama coming today. Jim is going to open up to Spock in a big way that will significantly change their relationship. Also, I recently received a comment about my grammer; I know it's not perfect, but I have a hard time correcting bad habits, so I'm afraid it won't change any time soon. I hope everyone enjoys the story anyway!**

* * *

><p>Chapter Eleven<p>

There seemed to be a new sense of ease between the two room/bondmates. The privacy screen remained untouched for the next few days, and Spock began to see more of Jim awake and outside their room. They would take a meal together here or there, and at one point, Spock had even attempted to teach him some Vulcan martial arts, though Jim, in spite of being in excellent shape for a human, had nearly injured himself trying to imitate his movements. They also began to talk of their lives on their home planets.

The only thing that bothered Spock in this new peace was the fact that he could not seem to get over the desire to try and touch the other man, in any way at all. He only abstained from doing so because he did not wish to alarm Jim. This also made it impossible to forget about the recording of him mating with Jim. He had given in to temptation and watched it again, almost succumbing to the urge to pleasure himself while he watched. He'd only been able to stop himself because he knew he would not be able to look Jim in the eye for the shame of it. And he would not do anything to risk damaging the fact that he was really getting to know Jim.

Spock learned that Jim held a steady job with a local mechanic and did some computer work on the side, all while maintaining some ancestral family property. He also learned that Jim exercised twice a day on board the ship, after he woke and before he retired. When he asked why, Jim just shrugged.

"I'm not used to just sitting around like this. Back home, I've always got something to do. If I'm not doing job work, I'm doing farm work. And if there's no farm work, then there's house work. As soon as I finish one thing, there's another that needs to be done. And sometime in between all that I try to get at least a decent enough amount of food, rest, and the occasional time off for fun."

Spock was rather impressed by this, and expressed as much to Jim.

"My father's status, from both our family name and his career has afforded our family much in the way of luxuries. We have staff to clean our home and cook our food, and I have never possessed a job. All of my time goes toward furthering my knowledge and trying to become a better Vulcan." Jim seemed confused by his statement.

"What do mean, 'be a better Vulcan'? What's wrong with how you are now?" Spock hesitated. He did not want to sound self-pitying or worse, have Jim come to see him as inferior, but the honest curiosity in his eyes prompted him to answer.

"You are aware I am half human. My parents agreed to raise me the Vulcan way. I have meditated, studied, and passed several rites of passage as all young Vulcans do. I think of myself as Vulcan. But no matter how much I accomplished, I was not accepted. My peers seemed to believe me tainted by my human blood. No matter what I did to try to earn their acceptance, I was simply too human to be good enough." His last words came out sounding far more bitter than he'd intended. Jim looked shocked.

"They shut you out for being half human? Why would they do that? Aren't Vulcans supposed to have some rule about embracing diversity?"

"We do have such a principle, however while it may seem like a good idea in theory, applying it to daily life eludes many Vulcans." Replied Spock. "Many of my peers would attack me, both verbally and physically in an attempt to make me show them an emotional response that would prove just how human I actually am. They were successful on rare occasions, and each time it was accomplished by saying derogatory things about my mother." He felt himself mentally curl inward, thinking that Jim would probably see him as a fool for reacting so. What Jim said caught him badly off guard.

"Wow." He said, sitting back. "You must really love your mom." Spock wasn't sure what he meant by that. Normally a human would be shocked if he did not express affection for his mother. But then, to hear a Vulcan admit to caring about anything was probably unexpected as well.

"I admit I am confused by your response. Did you think I would not love my mother?" Jim shook his head hastily.

"No, nothing like that. It's just, I didn't get along very well with my own mom when she was alive, so it's hard for me to imagine a good mother/son relationship."

"Why did you and your mother not get along?" Asked Spock before he could think about how rude he might be being. Jim shrugged.

"I didn't get it when I was little, but when I got older I realized that I reminded her of my dad, and that made her want to stay away from me and the feelings that being around me caused. Usually she went into space. Then, when I got older, she tried to send me away…" Jim trailed off, staring at the wall behind him.

"What happened?" Asked Spock without thinking. Jim's eyes snapped back to his.

"It just didn't work out well. She ended up having to take me back." He stood up abruptly. "I need to get ready for bed." He said, making his way over to the bathroom without a glance at Spock. Twenty minutes later he emerged, still avoiding Spock's gaze. He stood up, at somewhat of a loss.

"I apologize if I have said something to offend you." He offered, not sure what else he could say. It made Jim turn and look at him though.

"You didn't do anything; I just don't want to talk about it." With that, he pulled back the covers on his bed and lay down. Spock went into the bathroom to prepare himself for bed.

As he showered, he recalled when he'd seen that same shut out look on Jim's face; when they'd discussed Stonn's research on hybrid plants. He'd started off seeming truly interested, then withdrew suddenly and they did not speak of it anymore.

Spock didn't know what to do. He and Jim were on tentative good terms, and he did not wish to shatter that fragile peace. He lay down on his own bed and stared across at Jim, already asleep. Trying to focus on better moments, he too fell into sleep.

* * *

><p>Spock was awakened suddenly an undetermined amount of time later by the sudden shifting of his bed as weight was added to it. His eyes snapped open and adjusted to the dark. Jim was sitting on the edge of his bed, leaning over him. He sat back a little when he saw Spock was awake.<p>

"Sorry to wake you." He said quietly. "I just wanted to apologize for earlier, for being such an ass when we were talking."

"It is of no consequence." Murmured Spock. It was all he could think of to say; he was finding it extraordinarily difficult to think with Jim in such close proximity, and both of them on a bed, no less.

"Yes it is." Insisted Jim. "You've been great to me, putting up with all my moody shit and letting me act all weird around you. I wish I could do something to pay you back for how good you've been to me."

"Jim…" mumbled Spock. He was afraid to continue speaking, because if he did he might either fail to find words or worse, ask Jim for something highly inappropriate. Then, all thought deserted him as Jim slowly leaned down and pressed their lips together. Spock lay frozen for a moment, then kissed back eagerly. Jim shifted so that he was straddling Spock on the bed, which was really only made for one person. Their kissing picked up speed and intensity as they continued. Spock, unable to contain himself, managed to flip them over without sending them both onto the floor. He eagerly pulled at Jim's shirt until it came off and took a moment to drink in the sight of his sun kissed skin that seemed to glow even in the dark. He dropped down and began kissing Jim's neck, letting his hands roam all over his chest.

"Oh God, Spock." Moaned Jim, turning his head to allow him better access. "Please!" Spock sat up again and pulled off his own shirt, tossing to the floor to join Jim's He was unable to stop himself from grinding his hips against Jim's as his fingers reached for the waistband of his pants. But then, Jim began to struggle beneath him.

"No!" He shouted angrily. "Get off me, you sick fuck! Leave me alone!" Suddenly, Spock was no longer able to actually feel the body against his. Jim's voice on the other hand, became even louder.

He snapped awake, for real this time. He shook off the remnants of what he thought to be a dream turned nightmare, until he heard Jim continue to shout in the bed next to him.

"Let me go you pervert! Get off me!" Spock looked over and saw Jim thrashing around in his bed, trying to fight off an invisible assailant. Spock stumbled out of bed, still a little disoriented from the transition from dream into reality, and moved to Jim's side. He hesitated, not sure how to handle what was clearly a terrible nightmare for Jim.

"Jim." He finally said, gently grasping the younger man's shoulders and lightly shaking. "Jim, please wake up. You are having a nightmare." Jim jerked awake and stared at him, wide-eyed and not clearly seeing him. He shot up and lashed out at Spock, who was too surprised to prevent Jim's fist from connecting with his mouth, splitting his lower lip open. He barely registered the sting of the cut or the trickle of his blood down his chin as he saw clarity come into Jim's eyes as he took in what he had just done.

"Spock?" He whispered. Spock just nodded. "Oh God, I'm so sorry!" He slumped over and put his face in his hands. Spock realized he was struggling not to cry.

"Jim?" He said, a little timidly. "Can you tell me what is wrong?" He hesitantly placed a hand on Jim's shoulder and, to his great surprise, Jim slumped against his side, forcing him to sit down on the edge of the bed and put his arm around him in order to prevent him from falling out and onto the floor.

"I'm sorry about your face." Mumbled Jim. "Do you need the mender?"

"It can wait." Said Spock firmly. "Will you tell me what upset you so much?" He felt Jim begin to tremble against him.  
>"I…look, I told you there were reasons that I hadn't ever slept with a guy, and please just leave it at that." His trembling intensified, and Spock's heart ached with the need to try and soothe the obvious fear and pain Jim was feeling. He brought his other hand up and began to stroke his hair, just as he had done after Jim had begged him for help leaving the Pleasure Palace. He realized it was the first time he'd touched the other man since they'd left the brothel.<br>"If that is what you want, then that is what I will do. Now, please try to relax." He kept his tone soothing and his touch light, and he felt the tension begin to leave Jim's body. Just like that time, Jim began to fall asleep, still maintaining contact with Spock. Spock, realizing that he was fully asleep, forced himself to lower Jim back to the bed and let go so that he could pull the cover back over him. Then he went into the bathroom, wiped off as much of the blood as he could, and returned to his own bed, fighting down the need to wrap himself around Jim like a protective second skin and keep all the dangers, even the ones that were only memories, away.

When Spock woke again, Jim was already gone. It was the first time that had ever happened. It was clear that he wished to avoid Spock after what had happened. But why? Was it because he was embarrassed by his outburst? Or was he upset by the fact that Spock had touched him in an attempt at comfort? He took a moment to ponder just what might have been wrong with Jim last night. He also had to wonder why he'd had his own dream about Jim. He realized that he'd forgotten to mediate after viewing the footage again. It must have had some effect on him.

Sitting beside him on the bed was the dermal mender Jim had used on himself when they had first met. He picked it up and carried it into the bathroom so that he could look while he healed his lip, then scrubbed any remaining blood from his face. Then he went straight to the lab.

* * *

><p>Stonn looked up as Spock entered and had to resist staring. Spock looked terrible. He wondered how often he'd been meditating, or even sleeping, and if Jim had anything to do with his ragged appearance. For a moment he considered that Spock's ill-rested appearance might have been caused by their staying up all night engaging in sexual relations, but the air of unhappiness that surrounded Spock quickly disproved that theory. Pity, it would have made things much simpler for him. He had noticed a new sense of ease between them and had hoped that his interference was no longer necessary. He spoke up as Spock drew near.<p>

"Greetings Spock." He said neutrally. "I trust you are well?"

"Indeed." Said Spock tonelessly as he began making rounds and taking down data on the various plants growing in Stonn's allotted space. He glanced around, just a precaution to make sure they were alone. Spock spent most of his time in the lab when few or no other people were there. There were so many who offhandedly made derogatory comments about his genetic heritage, or that he was only able to unofficially assist in Stonn's project because he was not a student of the VSA. If only they knew that _he_ had turned _them_ down.

"You do not appear well." He stated. Spock looked up at him.

"It is quite illogical to ask me how I am if you already believe you know." He said coolly. Well, thought Stonn, that certainly confirmed his guess that he and Kirk were not engaged in any pleasurable activities.

"You may be correct." He said amicably. "How is Mr. Kirk today?" Spock shifted, clearly uncomfortable.

"I have not seen Jim today. He was already gone when I woke." He returned his attention to the plants and the padd he was making notes on. Stonn made another attempt.

"It is clear something is troubling you. I can see that you have not meditated in the last day or so." Apparently, this was the wrong thing to say, because Spock stopped pretending to focus on his work and turned a full and blatant glare his way.

"Because I am too human, correct? I would have no problems whatsoever if I was Vulcan enough for all the rest of my kind! Instead I am forced to work at least twice as hard to conceal any sign of the emotion's you 'true' Vulcan's find so distasteful!" He practically slammed the padd down on one of the tables and crossed his arms over his chest, clearly struggling to hold in his anger.

Stonn was taken aback. There was a time when he would have relished being able to drive Spock to this state, when his childish and vindictive mind would have been pleased to have so successfully and thoroughly tormented the one who had what he so desperately wanted. Now all he wanted was to make it stop.

"Spock," he said, trying to sound non-judgmental, "did something happen between you and Jim?" Spock's shoulders slumped, the anger draining out of his eyes.  
>"I do not know what happened." He hesitated. "You will not repeat this to anyone?" At Stonn's reassuring nod, he continued. "Jim had a terrible nightmare last night. I do not know the details of it, because he would not tell me, but it was clearly very upsetting. Jim has told me, more than once, that I have done nothing to traumatize him or permanently scar him, but I believe someone has. And while I wish very much to help him, I do not know how." Stonn was deeply moved by the combined look of earnestness and helplessness in Spock's eyes.<p>

"I am certain you will find a way." He assured him. "He may just need time. You have only recently started interacting in a friendly way, correct?" Spock nodded.

"That is true."

"Then for now, I suggest patience." Said Stonn. Spock nodded again.

"My thanks." He said quietly. Normally when offered thanks, Stonn would have given the typical Vulcan response and say that thanks were illogical. Instead, he simply accepted his friend's words with a nod and returned to his project.

* * *

><p>After they had concluded their business in the lab, Spock returned to his quarters to meditate. Stonn started to head to the Mess to get a meal, but found himself changing directions halfway there. He recalled something Spock had said about Kirk having a lot of energy to burn and visiting the ship's gymnasium twice a day. He wasn't sure what he'd say if he actually found Mr. Kirk there, but he felt he had to do something to help his friend.<p>

He entered the gym and looked around. It was empty, save for Jim Kirk running furiously on one of the treadmills. Stonn made sure that he was within eyesight as he approached, not wanting to startle the other man. Kirk saw him approaching and slowed down.

"Hey," he said, out of breath and clearly surprised, "what are you doing here?"

"I came because I am concerned for Spock." Said Stonn, getting right to the point. "He told me that something occurred last night that upset you, and he seems disturbed by that." Kirk stiffened up.

"He told you about my dream?" Stonn nodded shortly.

"Only that you had one, and that he was at a loss on how to deal with it." Kirk sighed.

"Look, I get that you're his friend and you're just looking out for him, but this doesn't concern you and-"

"Mr. Kirk," interrupted Stonn, "this may come as a surprise to you, but Spock and I were not always on such friendly terms." Seeing that he's successfully gained Mr. Kirk's attention, he resumed speaking. "Spock was originally betrothed to she who is now my wife. I was resentful of this and allowed the prejudice toward him that I shared with our peers to grow out of control. However when he came of age, Spock arranged for his betrothal to be dissolved and for her to be matched to me, as he saw us as a more logical pairing. Only a handful of years later, I found myself in the same state as when you met him. I would most likely have died without his generosity. As a result of these occurrences, my dislike of him diminished to the point that he has become a valued friend of mine. I am here now because of this, and because I can imagine what he is going through now." He gave Jim a long look.

"Because of my actions, and those of our peers, Spock has been forced to deal with feeling shut out and unwelcome his entire life. Now, he is trying to reach out to you. Even if you are still strangers for the most part, it is a Vulcan male's instinct to assist and care for his mate. Spock believes that he is struggling with his desire to help you because of his human heritage, but I believe that what he is experiencing is actually quite typical. And even if it were not, Spock is a good man with a kind heart who wishes to help you, and will if you allow him to. That is all I wish to say. Good day Mr. Kirk." He turned to leave.

"You can call me Jim." Came a quiet response, causing him to halt.

"Jim." He acknowledged. "I wish you luck in resolving your issues. And I hope you keep my words in mind." Stonn resumed walking out of the gym, hoping he'd helped push them both in the right direction.

* * *

><p>Jim didn't remain in the gym long after Stonn left, just long enough to do some cool down exercises. Then he headed back to his and Spock's quarters to clean up before he faced the other man. He wasn't fully surprised to find him already there. Spock looked up quickly from where he was meditating on the floor when he entered the room.<p>

"Hey." He said cautiously. "Is it okay if we talk?"

"Of course." Said Spock, looking a little surprised. He stood up and followed Jim's suit as he sat down on his bed. Jim hesitated, not sure where to start. Then he remembered the open look in Spock's eyes when he'd told him about being half human and never fitting in, and how Stonn's words had given that statement some rather heart-wrenching clarity. Jim could certainly relate to feeling unwanted, and that helped him get the words out.

"Last night, I dreamed about something that happened to me when I was fourteen." He paused and took a deep breath. "Do you remember what I told you yesterday, about how my mom always wanted to be away from me, and then when I was older, she tried sending me away instead?" Spock nodded, waiting for him to continue. "Okay, I'm gonna be honest with you and ask that you try not to say too much while I'm talking. If I have to stop, I might not be able to start again." Spock nodded to show his compliance. "When I got older, I was angry all the time, and it was mostly for the fact that my own mother would rather leave me with some drunken excuse for a stepfather and go off into space instead of dealing with whatever problems she had. I acted out a lot, mostly vandalism. I even got a criminal record. Eventually, she decided she couldn't risk having me around destroying people's property, so she sent me to live with some cousins of hers." He paused. Here came the hard part. "They lived on Tarsus IV." He saw Spock's eyes widen minutely. His eyes widened further as Jim practically saw him calculate the date of the massacre and Jim's age.

"You were there during the famine." It wasn't a question. Jim nodded.

"Yeah. I got there before anyone noticed anything wrong. At first, I was pissed to be there, and I let it show, but my mom's cousins were great, and I started to like it. Then the crops failed, and for some reason, no one was able to contact Starfleet for help. So Kodos split all of us up into two groups. I was put in the 'kill' group. I got sick a lot back then, plus I caused some pretty significant trouble when I first got there. Most of the people were the elderly, the youngest kids, and anyone who would fight about seeing their family members taken away. And anyone who could have been seen as weak or a threat, like me. I was actually one of the older kids there.

Kodos came out to address us. Hardly anyone besides his staff had ever seen him before, since he never left his headquarters. We figured it must be really important. Then he gave this speech about how we were a threat to the healthier, stronger members of the colony. Then his guards came out with their plasma rifles, and before anyone had a chance to really do anything about it, they started firing. The people closest to the shooting died right away. I was somewhere in the middle of the group, and when everyone started panicking and trying to run, I got knocked around a lot. When I got my bearings, I saw that this little kid had been knocked into me and kind of latched on. I ended up dragging him through the crowd with me as I ran. Some others started to follow us, and by the time we got to edge of the crowd, all of the guards had rushed inward to shoot at everyone. We ran for the hills and didn't look back." Jim stopped and looked at Spock again, who was watching him silently.

"That was just the beginning." He said quietly. "We could still hear the screams and smell the burning flesh as we ran. They say death by plasma rifle is painless, but it's not. Not if they don't hit the right way. When we finally stopped, I had a chance to figure out what was going on. There were nine of us altogether. One of them, a guy named Tom was a year older than me. The kid I'd dragged out of there with me was a two-year-old named Kevin. The others all ranged from five to ten. Since Tom and I were the oldest, we were pretty much in charge. He usually kept the kids quiet while I was out looking for guards or food or something. I was used to sneaking around and running from authority figures. There was so much chaos that day, they had no idea anyone made it out of there alive. It wasn't hard to pretend to one of the people chosen to live. I'd sneak around and steal a little bit from people who I thought could live without it. I had to be careful; I couldn't draw any attention to myself. For about a month and a half, everything went okay. But one day, I got caught. A guard from the execution recognized me and cornered me in an abandoned building. I thought he was going to kill me, but instead he got this look on his face…" Jim swallowed and steeled himself against what he had to say next.

"He looked at me like…like he wanted something, and I had no idea what. Then he started talking about how I was cute and how we could maybe make a deal. I thought maybe he wanted me to steal for him too or something, but then he started opening his pants and I realized what he wanted. I tried to get outside, but he knocked me down. Then, he was on top of me. I felt him trying to get my pants open and…"

"And?" Whispered Spock, looking like he was dreading the answer.

"And the next thing I knew, I was standing over him. There was a rock in my hand, covered in blood and…other stuff. Hair and…bits of his brain, I guess. He was lying on the ground. There was more blood everywhere. I didn't stop to try and figure out what happened. I just grabbed the stuff I'd already managed to steal and ran back to the kids. I only stopped to wash off for a bit. Later on, when I calmed down, I knew that I somehow managed to attack him and fight him off." Jim paused, his breathing fast and heavy. "Starfleet showed up with rescue efforts about a week later. I never told anyone that part of it. I never even found out if the guy lived or died. I may have killed someone that day, and I don't know. I'm not sure I really want to know." Jim felt his voice break and the tears that had gathered heavy in his eyes begin to fall. He started to slump over, only to feel the bed dip next to him and pair of warm arms surround him and pull him close to an equally warm body.

* * *

><p>Spock was unable to resist moving over to Jim and wrapping him in a protective embrace when he heard his voice catch and saw him start to sway. Jim didn't push him away, but he did not return the embrace either. He just sat there, shaking and fighting his tears. Spock knew he had to say something.<p>

"You were only a child." He said, trying to keep his voice soothing as he once again stroked a hand through Jim's hair. "You were starving and alone, and you had others who needed you to return. You were far stronger than many adults would have been in the situation. Sometimes when people are trapped, their minds retreat and let their physical instincts take over to do what must be done in order to ensure survival." He pulled back a bit to look down at Jim, who was staring at him almost sightlessly. "You are exhausted." He said gently. "You should rest now, and if you wish to speak more of this later, we will do so."

He lowered Jim down to the pillow, where he slowly fell asleep. Spock realized that the covers had not been pulled back and got the cover off of his bed and draped it over Jim's still form. He was trying to contemplate what to do next when the desk comm rang. He walked over to it and answered without checking who it was, worried that the ringing would wake Jim from his much needed rest. He found himself looking at a rather gruff-looking human who looked just as surprised as he felt.

"You sure aren't Jim." He remarked with a strong accent that Spock was unfamiliar with.

"Indeed I am not." He replied coolly. "May I ask what purpose you have in calling here?"

"I'm Dr. Leonard McCoy, I was assigned to his case. Is he there?" Asked the man. Spock found it hard to believe that this man was supposed to help heal a potentially damaged mind, but he kept that thought to himself.

"He is resting right now. I recommend that you call back at a later time. I will be sure to mention it to him."

"And just who am I talking to?" Asked the human, sounding more than a little suspicious.

"I am Spock, the one who brought him here. If that is all, then I must bid you good day." He disconnected without waiting for a reply. He felt some satisfaction as he did so. Something about that particular human was oddly…abrasive to him.

He returned his attention to Jim, sleeping quietly on his bed. He decided to try to meditate. There was no way he was getting any sleep tonight. As he settled down on the floor and began attempting to center himself, he tried to focus on some positive things. Jim had opened up to him. Granted, it was to share a most horrific experience, but it was still something. All he could do now was prepare for the aftermath when Jim awoke.

* * *

><p><strong>Well, I don't know about you, but I am exhausted! So, there's Jim's reason for never sleeping with a guy. Well almost, there's a little more that will come later on. I haven't started on the next chapter yet, and I'm about to start seven or eight days of work in a row, so I don't know when I'll have the next chapter up. But I'll do my best to make it before Christmas. I was thinking about doing a Christmas story too, and basing it off of a Christmas episode of The Big Bang Theory. In a lot of ways, Spock reminds me of Sheldon, with his blunt, emotionally stunted, long-winded way of saying things. Anybody think it's a good idea?<strong>


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry about being late, but at least I made it in time for Christmas. My own Christmas story is going to have to wait until after, I'm afraid, since I have to work this weekend. In this installment, Spock and Stonn have a little chat, and Spock begins to wonder if he's already met Mr. Right. Also, we see Amanda!**

**On a separate note, it's been just over a year since I started posting. I was hoping to have this up on the anniversary, but better late than never!**

* * *

><p>Chapter Twelve<p>

Spock left early the next morning on the presumption that Jim would need some time alone after being so emotionally strained the night before. He went to the lab to find something to do to keep himself occupied while Jim continued to sleep. He entered the lab and was unsurprised to find Stonn already there working. What did surprise him was the way Stonn's gaze met his immediately and stayed there as if he was expecting to see something in particular.

"Is there something I may do for you?" Asked Spock, beginning to feel unnerved.

"How are things with Jim?" Asked Stonn, barely waiting for Spock to finish his sentence.

"We spoke about some very…private things in his life last night. I do not know how he will feel about that today." Admitted Spock.

"I am certain if he was willing to divulge private information to you, he will be more than willing to continue positive relations." Said Stonn. Spock looked at him suspiciously.

"Why are you so interested to know what happened last night?" He asked. Stonn gave him a perfectly schooled look of innocence.

"You were clearly in distress from your conflict with your mate. I was merely trying to ascertain if you have resolved it." Spock's suspicion only increased.

"Did you speak with Jim about my 'distress' last night?" He asked. Stonn seemed to become a little resigned.

"I mentioned to Jim that you wished to help him and that it might be advantageous to you both if he gave you a chance." Explained Stonn. "Obviously I was successful in convincing him of that. I would have expected you to be more satisfied with the result of my involvement."

"I would be satisfied if Jim had come to me for help based on his own decision, not because you made it sound like it could solve all of his problems." Retorted Spock.

"How do you know it will not?" Asked Stonn, showing a hint of stubbornness. "Perhaps you will be able to help him in ways that even you do not know yet. As his mate, it is your duty to give him what he asks of you." Spock's shoulders slumped.

"He is not my mate, not really. Soon our minds will be broken apart and he will forget me." He was shocked by how bitter he sounded. Stonn was watching him again as if he hoped to see a certain something.

"Not if you convinced him to remain your mate." He said quietly. Spock looked at him sharply.

"Why would I do that? It would be most illogical."

"Not if Jim is in fact the best match that exists for you." Argued Stonn. "I have seen that you care for him already, and I believe it is caused by more than just the bond, or a sense of obligation brought on by the circumstances surrounding its creation. You are mentally rebelling against the idea of breaking it the way I would if I were to learn that I would one day be forced to separate from T'Pring." Spock hesitated.

"Theoretically, if you were correct about this, how would I go about convincing him to keep the bond between us? He is expecting it to be broken, as is my father and Healer Fer'at. I cannot simply tell all of them that it must be postponed because I believe it might be possible for us to have a real marriage." Spock figured that would be that, but Stonn continued to try to persuade him.

"The bond is strong; you do now know if it will be possible to break it by the time we arrive on Earth. What will you do then? If Jim elects to return to Vulcan with us, he will be completely in your care. You could court him." Spock almost scoffed.

"How would I court him? Vulcans have had no need of such rituals for thousands of years."

"I have told you that my parents were not linked as children like most Vulcans, one of the reasons they did not work excessively hard to arrange a match for me. They trusted that I would find the mate best suited to me on my own, and while they follow the teachings of Surak, they still value some of the older customs as well. Shortly after my father declared his intent to court my mother, her father died unexpectedly. She and my grandmother had no one to provide for them, so they were almost forced to leave their home to live with a distant cousin. My father instead went into their home and took on the role of provider for them. In doing so, he demonstrated the qualities that would have made him a suitable husband and father. My mother, in turn, was able to demonstrate what she had to offer as a potential wife. My mother chose to marry my father based on the fact that he was able to care for her and her mother, as well as any future children. And also, during their time together, she grew to greatly care for and admire him." Stonn paused.

"Their courtship was somewhat similar to the old ways, when a warrior would attempt to draw a mate by demonstrating his physical prowess and abilities as a breadwinner. If he wished to attract a wife, he would show that he could anticipate and provide for all her needs. If he wished to bond with a fellow warrior, he would show his respect for the other warrior by offering his assistance in matters of finding necessities, by demonstrating his fighting skills, or by looking out for his intended in battle to demonstrate their compatibility. I believe in some ways, it is similar with humans. They interact with one another in social settings and advertise their best qualities to potential mates in the hope of attracting them. You could show Jim that you are capable of caring for him, or that you respect his own abilities but can help if needed." He paused, then summed up his lecture.

"With most of our people, we are bonded and then come to tolerate and care for each other as time goes by. With my parents, and with T'Pring and myself, affection and esteem came before bonding. In a sense, you may have both of those paths before you. Yes, you are already bonded, but you have the option of breaking it without any kind of social repercussion. In a sense, you might as well _not_ be bonded. If you and Jim could come to genuinely care for one another, you could choose to keep the bond intact, make an official marriage, and never have to worry about finding another mate."

Spock hesitated. It did seem rather logical. But Jim would not want to come to Vulcan. He wanted to be home, where he felt safe and secure, not in yet another strange place surrounded by even more strangers. Strangers who would look down on him for simply being who he was. Stonn sensed his hesitation.

"My parents were right; I found the right mate for myself. However I might not have been able to actually have her if it had not been for you going out of your way to help me. Allow me to help you now."

"It would be an ideal solution." Admitted Spock. "But I cannot and will not bring Jim home with me to a place where he would feel unsafe and unwelcome. That is my final word." He gazed levelly at Stonn, who gave a nod that looked rather forced.

"As you wish." They completed the rest of their day's work in silence.

* * *

><p>Jim had woken feeling rather drained. He recalled the events of the night before and wondered just how he was going to face Spock after that. Why had he told him the whole freaking Tarsus IV story? He could have just said that he was almost raped by a man when he was fourteen. But even as he thought that, Jim knew he wouldn't have been able to leave it at that. He wouldn't have been able to adequately express all the fear and pain he associated with the encounter without explaining the circumstances, the weeks of desperation and helplessness that surrounded it. There was no way to make him really understand without the whole story. So Jim had spilled his guts without really thinking things through.<p>

What if Spock looked at him differently now? It had taken him all this time to get him to stop treating him like he was traumatized by having sex with him; how would he be now that he knew Jim had been traumatized by a man before they had ever even met. Would Spock begin to feel guilty again? Knowing what had almost happened to him before, would he feel that he had finished what that guard had started?

Jim decided that whatever happened, he would make sure that Spock knew his feelings on the matter hadn't changed, and that he had no reason to feel guilty for what had happened. That decided he went and took the shower he hadn't had the night before and tried to let the hot water soothe his nerves. After he finished cleaning himself, he stood under the spray for another five minutes before shutting it off and activating the air driers. Pulling on his sleep shirt and pants he exited the bathroom-and saw Spock about to open the door for himself. They just stared at each other for a moment.

"Hi." Said Jim finally.

"Hello." Replied Spock quietly.

"I was gonna come talk to you." Jim said.

"I had hoped to speak with you as well." Admitted Spock. He gestured toward their beds, and they sat down. Jim spoke first.

"I guess I probably shouldn't have given you all that drama last night. I could have just told you the part that affects this thing between you and me. I just…that one part of it kind of brings it all back to me, you know?"

"I believe so." Replied Spock. "Considering the circumstances, the events would be difficult to separate." He paused. "I only regret that you did not come to the conclusion of telling me your story of your own volition."

"What are you talking about?" Asked Jim, looking confused.

"Stonn told me that he spoke to you. I apologize for whatever he said that made you feel you obligated to confide in me." Jim shook his head.

"I didn't tell you that stuff because I felt obligated. Well, maybe a little, but I would have felt that way whether I talked to Stonn or not. I told you so you would really understand what a big deal it is to me that I had sex with a guy."

"I understand." Said Spock, actually looking sad. "Our encounter has served as a reminder of the trauma you endured in the past." Jim shook his head again.

"No, it didn't. At least not right away. The whole time we were…you know, I didn't think about him. Not once. All my focus was on what was happening right then." He sighed heavily and looked down. "I think that's what always scared me the most about the whole idea; being stuck in the past in my head reliving something awful when I'm supposed to be learning and enjoying myself."

"Why exactly is it you feared sexual intercourse with a man?" Asked Spock. "Was there any reason other than what you described from Tarsus IV?" Jim hesitated, and Spock clearly saw it. "You do not need to tell me if it is something you do not wish to discuss."

"No, it's okay. This part is nothing compared to what I've already told you." He took a deep breath before continuing. "After I got back home, once I was healthy and didn't look like the walking dead anymore," he paused for a moment, thinking he saw Spock flinch slightly, "I started to notice my stepdad, Frank, watching me differently. Frank loved to smack me around when I was little, and he was always watching for any little excuse to punish me, but it wasn't until I was about fifteen that I noticed him looking at me that way. It reminded me of the way that guard did, right before he attacked me. After that, I didn't stick around much longer. My brother ran away when he was that age too. I wondered sometimes if it was because Frank looked at him that way too. I was going to ask him that when I got to Deneva. That, and why, if he thought Frank would do something like that, didn't he take me with him."

"Where did you go?" Asked Spock, appearing riveted.

"I mostly hid out at neighbor's farms for a while. They didn't even really know I was there; it was late Spring and I mostly stayed in their barns at night. Not long after that, I got a job and got emancipated. I'd already graduated early, so I could focus all my time on making money. I already had some from a bunch of really valuable bonds my dad's parent's got me, as well as my inheritance from them, and pretty much all the birthday and Christmas money I ever got in my life." Seeing Spock's surprise, he added. "I was planning on leaving that house from the moment my mom said she was marrying Frank. I knew I probably wouldn't be allowed to until I was eighteen, so I just prepared as best as I could. I got my own apartment and kept to myself for the most part, aside from a few disturbances here and there. But I couldn't just leave everything behind. I couldn't forget how that guard and Frank looked at me, and anytime a guy would look at me like that, it would just take me back to those moments. So I stuck to women. I don't usually feel vulnerable with them. I always figured if I ever slept with a guy, it would be someone I knew pretty well who didn't look at me like they knew they could get whatever they wanted from me without any kind of consideration for my rights."

"That is a more than sufficient expectation in a sexual relationship." Said Spock. "I am truly grieved that you did not experience that."

"What do mean?" Asked Jim. "You stopped when I said no, remember? Or maybe you don't, but it's true. And I didn't think of anything else the whole time we were together. I don't feel violated, or damaged, or different in any way. So please don't go back to beating yourself up about it." There was a hint of relief in Spock's eyes.

"I will do my best to do as you ask."

* * *

><p>After they went to bed that night, Spock lay awake pondering over what Jim had told him, and what would happen when they reached Earth. Their engineers had managed to coax more speed out of the engines, and now they were to arrive in orbit in two more days. When they got there, Spock knew the Healer would insist that the bond be severed and he and Jim would part ways.<p>

After all the things Jim had told him about himself, he couldn't imagine just not seeing him ever again.

_As if he would want to remain in contact with me_, thought Spock bitterly as he found himself trying to find a way that he might remain involved in Jim's life somehow. Jim was being kind and friendly now, but what happened if he tired of Spock's presence? Humans who were perfectly content to be together at first often tired of their companions and moved on to someone else. True, his mother never tired of his father, but theirs was a special case. She had embraced the mental bond and knew Sarek as well as any Vulcan woman could. Once simply did not grow tired of another with that kind of connection between them.

He recalled Stonn's words. What if he could convince Jim to keep the mind link, or at least give it a chance? He quickly pushed aside the thought. It might have been good, but it was just too risky. He was on surprisingly good terms with his new friend/temporary husband, but that might change if he seemed to suddenly change his mind about having their bond dissolved. Jim might hate him, think that he was using him in order to survive his next Pon Farr, or just as sexual gratification whenever he felt like it.

No, he couldn't take that risk.

* * *

><p>The next two days went by too quickly and not quickly enough for Spock's liking. It seemed that Jim might feel the same way, though for a different reason. While Spock was willing to give Jim his freedom, he couldn't help but dread the thought of the bond breaking. Jim seemed to be equally nervous, though he was likely worried about how it would affect him rather than the fact that it would mean that Spock would be out of his life. He was also more restless than ever, knowing he was so close to being home, yet not quite there yet. Spock had to work very hard to resist the urge to open the connection between them and soothe his troubled mind.<p>

Finally, the signal came that meant they were less than five hours from achieving orbit around Earth. Spock knew it was now or never. He escorted Jim to the Medbay once more. Jim radiated nervous energy, and Spock had to force his feet to continue carrying him forward to fulfill his promise to the younger man. Once they were there, they were both surprised to find that Fer'at was surprised to see them.

"It would be wise to wait until after your father's business on Earth is concluded. I was told you intended to visit with your mother's family. To break the bond now could leave you somewhat disoriented and uncomfortable. It would be considered shameful to allow yourself to be seen in such a state." Spock couldn't help but feel some relief as he heard that his bond was not going to be broken yet, but Jim looked angry.

"No one said anything about this to me." He growled. "What am I supposed to do once it's broken? Just stumble around or check into a hospital and wait it out? I seriously doubt my doctor knows anything about Vulcan induced brain trauma."

"I assure you Jim," said Spock before Fer'at could reply, "you will not be left to deal with it alone. I will gladly arrange for whatever is required for your recovery to be made available to you if it is needed." Jim looked mollified by that.

"Okay then." He muttered. "So what am I supposed to do while you're visiting your mom? Do you want me to stay here and wait until your visit's over?" Spock could tell Jim was dreading his answer, thinking it would be yes. Instead, Spock surprised himself.

"My mother will undoubtedly learn what brought you here with us, from either myself or my father. I believe she would like to meet you, if only to ascertain your well-being." Jim looked totally dumbstruck. Then, after an awkward silence, he answered.

"Okay, if you're sure."

"I am." Said Spock.

* * *

><p>Jim couldn't believe what was happening now. First some stuck up Vulcan doctor told him he'd be left on his own to deal with possible brain damage. Then Spock had told him this was not to be the case, and then invited Jim to come meet his mother! Jim didn't do so well with meeting parents. It was one of the reasons he didn't really date much.<p>

_Calm down_, he told himself as he followed Spock back to their quarters, _it's not like you're meeting her to get her approval as the new boyfriend or apologize for deflowering her baby boy. She'll probably want to make sure that I won't make a big scene about all this, like Sarek._

Jim tried to relax, lest Spock see his tension. The Vulcan seemed to be able to read him so well. He did his best to focus on packing his things and readying himself to be back on Earth, home safe and sound. Then he thought of something.

"Hey Spock? Where does your mom's family live?" He asked.

"They live in Canada, Montreal to be specific." Replied Spock.

"Oh." Said Jim, not adding anything else. At least he'd be on the same continent as Iowa. He returned to packing, wondering just how he was going to handle this part of the trip, and how he would be affected by the bond-breaking afterward.

* * *

><p>Sarek sat waiting for his wife to answer her comm. He knew he was only putting off the inevitable waiting to call her. There was something of a delicate process with telling her bad news. He couldn't tell her too soon, lest her anger build up in the time between receiving the news and his arrival, but if he waited until he told her in person, she would be immediately furious about having been 'kept in the dark' on the matter. This way, she would have some time to calm down and just be grateful for the fact that Spock was alive and the situation was under control. He focused on the screen as he saw it light up.<p>

"Sarek." She said, smiling at him serenely. She had learned to tone down emotional displays such as smiling since coming to live on Vulcan. It was deceptive, though. He could see the intense joy in her eyes at being able to speak with him again after over roughly a month apart.

"My wife." He replied, just taking in her image for a moment. But he knew he could not delay. Especially when she asked the question he'd been dreading.

"How is Spock? Is he there with you?" He'd thought about how he was going to break this news, and he decided to start from the beginning.

"I am afraid there has been some difficulty recently." He informed her. Her eyes widended, and he knew she was fighting the urge to assume the worst. "You know that he took the entrance exams to the VSA. He passed, but then refused admission when one of the ministers said something that he found insulting. Then, on the way here, his Time came." Amanda couldn't hide her gasp of shock.

"Is he alright?" Sarek nodded.

"He is well; there was a…facility that provided the services needed to keep him alive." He watched as she quickly filled in the blanks.

"You took him to a _prostitute_?" She asked, looking too shocked to be angry, yet.

"We had no other options." He told her gently. After a moment, she nodded.

"I understand. Don't get me wrong, I'm not happy about this, and we'll be talking about it later, but I'm glad he's alright."

"There is more." He said gravely. "Spock bonded himself to the young man who helped him through the fever, and he learned that he was not working at the facility of his own free will. He was kidnapped just a week before and sold to them."

"That's awful!" Cried Amanda, looking horrified. "That poor young man…but you said he helped Spock through the fever…"

"Indeed." Replied Sarek. "Spock managed to communicate his need, and he consented to the act. Afterward, when Spock knew the truth, he contacted me. I then contacted Captain Christopher Pike aboard the USS _Lincoln_ and we arranged the rescue of all the captives there. Jim, the young man, is now with us. He and Spock proved to be startlingly compatible, and the bond required time to settle before it can be broken. Healer Fer'at will make carry it out when we are ready to leave Earth to return home."

"This man, Jim, is he alright?" Asked Amanda. "Was he hurt? Does he know that Spock wasn't in control at the time? Is he going to try to press charges against Spock?"

"I attempted to learn the same shortly after we resumed our course to Earth. I admit, I was prepared to offer him…incentive to leave our family out of this, but he has been surprisingly logical about the whole affair. He does not blame Spock for what happened, nor I or anyone else for bringing Spock to him. Indeed his is grateful to have met Spock, as it led to his release from captivity. He was rather angered by the fact that I tried to take such preventative measures to protect our family name, but other than that, he has been very calm about the whole situation. He and Spock are now sharing quarters."

"Sharing quarters?" Asked Amanda, startled. "They're staying in Spock's room together?" Ah yes. With everything that had happened, the fact that Spock was staying away from him had slipped his mind.

"Spock and I argued about his decision to turn down the VSA. Instead of his usual room in our family quarters, he opted to share with Stonn. Once we were aware that Spock would need to remain in close proximity with Jim for the time being, Stonn offered to room with another student who had an open bed in his room, and give his bed to Jim. They have been sharing quarters with no incident so far."

"Stonn." Said Amanda affectionately. "Remind me to send him an extra batch of snicker doodles on his birthday." It was almost alarming how much Stonn enjoyed Amanda's snicker doodles. Were it not for his Vulcan control, he could have eaten a dozen in mere minutes.

"How serious was this fight?" Asked Amanda. "Do you at least accept his decision now, or are you pressing him to reconsider?"

"I had thought that his decision might have been made in haste due to his illness." Admitted Sarek. "He told me that I was wrong and that he would not reconsider joining them as he believes he will never be fully accepted."

"He'd be right!" Snapped Amada. "You know, I sometimes regret agreeing to raise him exclusively Vulcan. If I had known that he'd be an outcast no matter how controlled and disciplined he was, I would have demanded more human rearing as well. At least humans who claim to be open to change and diversity mean it most of the time. Almost every Vulcan I've ever met preaches IDIC but really only values purity. And don't tell me I'm being illogical!" She warned, seeing him open his mouth to disagree. He did as suggested. "For now, I'm just going to be happy for the fact that Spock is alive and well, and that everything is alright for the moment. As for this Jim, I'd like to meet him, if only to thank him for helping Spock." Sarek nodded.

"I believe Spock has already come to that conclusion, because he invited him to his visit with you."

"Good." Said Amanda, sounding satisfied. "I'm looking forward to it. What is his full name, by the way?"

"James Kirk." Replied Sarek. Seeing the look in her eyes, he nodded. "He is the younger son of Captain George Kirk."

"Oh my." Murmured Amanda. "If he did decide to accuse Spock of something…"

"I had the same thought." Agreed Sarek. "However, I truly believe he will not. He is grateful for his release and truly understands that Spock is not to blame for anything that has happened to him. I do not know what will come after the bond-breaking, but I am certain Jim means no harm toward Spock, and fees secure that no one will attempt anything against him."

"Good." Said Amanda, looking relieved. And that was that. They moved on to make arrangements for their own reunion.

* * *

><p>Spock was nearly finished packing for their departure from the ship. Jim had already finished and was now in the restroom, making use of it before he had to leave and wouldn't have a chance to if needed.<p>

Spock pulled out his personal padd to check over his messages and some notes on his research with Stonn. As his files appeared before him, he saw the saved copy of the security recording there again. In his concern over Jim's well-being, he'd forgotten about it. He remembered how he'd watched it several times, hungrily watching Jim in the recording, wishing he could recall the sight of him wonton beneath him. Then he remembered the sorrow and pain in Jim's face as he recounted his experiences, and the guilt he'd felt over nearly pleasuring himself to the footage like it was some kind of homemade pornography.

He deleted it without another thought. Then he put his padd into one of his bags and finished with the rest of his packing. The recording was gone. As a human might say, 'out of sight, out of mind'.

If only.

* * *

><p><strong>I'm afraid that once again, I can't say when the next chapter will be. I can say that we'll see Jim meet Amanda, and possibly a decision on Spock's part concerning Jim. Happy Holidays everyone! Thanks for making the time I've spent here so awesome!<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

**Like I promised forever ago, Jim will get to meet Amanda. And we will find out a little more about how they have to deal with the bond. And there's a lot of personal drama here today. Hopefully this nice long chapter helps make up for the lateness.**

* * *

><p>Chapter Thirteen<p>

Jim was hurriedly packing the last of his things. Spock had already gone ahead with his things to get their shuttle ready. Stonn was coming with them too. Apparently he was quite fond of Amanda due to her role in getting him and T'Pring paired together. As he finished zipping up his shoulder bag, he heard the room's console ring again. He hurried to answer it, already knowing who it was; Dr. McCoy always called at this particular hour, when Jim was certain to be awake.

"Hey Bones." He said. McCoy scowled half-heartedly. Jim had given him the nickname after he mentioned how his ex-wife had cleaned him out in their divorce, leading to his enlistment in  
>Starfleet. Now he couldn't get Jim to stop calling him by his new nickname.<p>

"How's it going today?" He asked. "Are you back to Earth yet?"

"Almost." Replied Jim. "We're about half an hour away. First we're going to Montreal, then they'll take me to Riverside. Before that though, their Healer guy is going to break the bond and, if necessary, provide human doctors with whatever information they need in case it totally screws me up in the head." McCoy's eyes narrowed.

"Screw you up how?" He asked seriously. "Is there a possibility of serious harm?"

"I don't know." Admitted Jim. "They're secretive; I don't really get the impression the Healer cares too much as long as it doesn't mess too much with his own life. I think he sees Spock as his real priority. I'm pretty sure Spock _is_ concerned though, and I think he'll make sure the guy's careful while he's poking around in our heads. And he promised me he'd make sure I'd have whatever I needed to recover if anything went wrong."

"Well, you're _my_ real priority, and I want any information he has on what can go wrong, and how to deal with it if it does." Said McCoy.

"Yeah, sure." Said Jim, feeling suprisingly moved by the doctor's words. "I need to get going. Spock's waiting for me. He wants to go down as soon as possible."

"Hang on, you said you were going to visit Montreal." Said McCoy. "What're you going to Canada for?"

"Oh, that." Said Jim with a shrug. "Spock wants me to meet his mom." The look of shock on McCoy's face might have been funny if it hadn't caught Jim off guard.

"He wants you to meet his mom?" McCoy repeated. "Why?" Jim shrugged again.

"He says she'll probably want to see both of us to make sure that he's okay, and that I'm okay, and to say thanks for helping him or something. I'm tired of being cooped up in a series of small rooms, so I'm going. One of his friends is going with us, and they're probably waiting on me now."

"Okay." Said McCoy, letting it go. "It just sounds a little weird is all, like you guys are actually a new couple or something." Jim laughed.

"Yeah, I thought something like that too. I think he's right though; she just wants to make sure everyone involved is alright and that everything will be okay. The way he's talked about her, she sounds like a really nice lady."

"Well, she's human." Remarked McCoy. "She's got to seem nice compared to a Vulcan." Jim shrugged yet again.

"Yeah, I guess." He didn't really care for the insinuation that Spock, a Vulcan, wasn't nice. It'd be just about the furthest thing from the truth. "I guess I'll talk to you next time. You got my address in Iowa, right?"

"Yeah." Said McCoy. "I'll talk to you when your home. Just remember to send me a message to let me know when you're back home."

"I will." Promised Jim. "Bye."

"Bye." Replied McCoy, cutting the connection. Jim quickly gathered his bags together and headed for the door. He glanced back at the room, and unexplained feeling causing him to pause. He shrugged it off and continued on his way out.

* * *

><p>Spock stood with Stonn in front of the same shuttle he'd taken down to Omega. He detected movement off to the side and saw Jim come in. Jim gave him a little smile, and it felt as if his heart skipped a beat or two. Stonn followed his glance and then looked back at him with a knowing gaze. Spock ignored it and focused on Jim.<p>

"Are you prepared to depart?"

"Yeah." Jim replied. "Sorry I'm late; I got a call from McCoy, and I told him where we were going." He started to walk up the ramp, balancing all his bags. Spock stepped forward without thinking.

"May I take one of those for you?" Jim looked surprised.

"Yeah, sure. Thanks." He handed over a suitcase and continued up. Spock followed, along with Stonn, who continued to watch them both closely. Spock took his place in the pilot's seat, noting with surprise that Jim automatically settled into the passenger seat as if he'd done it a million times before. Stonn made no comment, just sat down in one of the rear passenger seats. It was only a matter of minutes before the ship dropped out of warp, the docking bay doors opened, and Spock received clearance to depart.

The flight was made in almost total silence. Spock had to fight from sneaking glances at Jim and the fact that he knew Stonn was still watching the both of them. As they flew over the North American continent, Spock gave in and glanced at Jim to see how he was doing. Jim was studying the land beneath them intently. Spock wondered if he was looking for anything familiar, a glimpse of home. They left the American section of the continent and entered Canada. A few minutes more and they were preparing to land outside of Amanda's family's home. There was a considerable yard, which allowed them to land close to the house.

After they set down, Spock powered down the shuttle and stood up from his seat. Jim and Stonn followed suit. Spock almost gestured for Jim to go ahead of him, but realized that his mother might come out to meet him, and might overwhelm Jim with an overly affectionate greeting. It also might unnerve Jim to be introduced so abruptly to more strangers. Spock therefore went down the ramp first, followed by Stonn and then Jim. No sooner than he'd descended the ramp, the door to his parent's Earth home opened and his mother's face lit up as she caught sight of him.

"Spock!" She cried, running out to him. She managed to restrain herself from simply throwing herself around him. Instead, she grasped his shoulders and squeezed them before gently hugging him. "It's so good to see you again."

"Hello Mother." Spock said sedately, though he knew she could tell he was pleased to see her. She pulled back and began looking him over carefully. Spock knew right then that Sarek had already contacted her about what had happened during their trip. She was clearly trying to ascertain that he was in good health. She must have been satisfied for the moment because she pulled back with a nod. She looked behind him at Stonn.

"Stonn. It's very agreeable to see you again." Stonn nodded at her cordially.

"And you, Lady Amanda." He came to stand beside Spock, and Amanda looked past them both at Jim. Perhaps it was her motherly instincts, or her many years of work as a teacher, but her gaze instantly gentled as she smiled at the young human.

"Hello." She said softly. "You must be Jim."

"Yeah." He said, looking surprised. He stood there, clearly uncertain about what to say. "Um, it's nice to meet you."

"It's very nice to meet you." She replied warmly. "Why don't we all go inside so we can talk?" She gestured back toward the house then turned and began walking. The three young men followed her obediently.

Once inside, Amanda offered them all refreshment. Jim had some juice while Spock had water. Stonn almost took water as well, until Amanda showed him the batch of snicker doodles she'd prepared specially for him. He was now sipping a glass of milk while he savored a freshly-baked cookie. Spock politely listened as she described the goings on of her family on Earth, and how her parents and cousins were all very excited about meeting him in person for the first time. Apparently it wasn't completely satisfactory to them to speak to him every few years via comm setup.

Jim was silent for the most part. Spock snuck glances at him every so often to make sure he didn't look upset by anything. He seemed perfectly at ease for the moment, drinking his juice and listening to Amanda's stories. He actually laughed at one point when she mentioned an incident with some younger third cousins attempting to restore an outdated hovercar and then crashing it into a pool. She seemed delighted to get some real emotional feedback from a guest. Spock found the same satisfaction in Jim's laugh that he found in the grateful looks and smiles that he received for any little gesture.

After roughly thirty minutes of conversation, there was a knock on the door. Amanda went to open it and there was a great clamor of voices. Spock realized his extended family had arrived. He found himself surrounded by several older men and women who all wanted to look at him and coo over how tall he'd grown, how he had his mother's eyes, how wonderful it was that he was finally here in person, etc. He noticed in his peripheral vision that Jim was slowly edging toward the kitchen door. He made no move to stop him; he would probably do the same thing if their positions were reversed. It seemed his mother noticed as well, because she too made her way toward the kitchen. For the first time, he felt a little nervous, but he quickly shook it off. His mother was the gentlest soul he knew. She would not intentionally do anything to upset Jim.

* * *

><p>Jim stepped through the door of a modern but cozy kitchen and breathed a sigh of relief. Spock's family seemed like good people, but unless he was at a bar or club, he really didn't like crowds. Especially not crowds of overweight, giggly, cheek-pinching aunts and uncles. He didn't even know these people, so he seriously doubted that Spock would hold it against him if he excused himself. He finished his juice and considered getting himself another glass when he heard the sound of a throat being cleared behind him. He turned sharply and saw Amanda Grayson standing there, watching him.<p>

"Excuse me." She said politely. "I didn't mean to disturb you."

"It's your house." Muttered Jim with a shrug. He knew he sounded rude, but it was kind of his thing when he didn't have any prior knowledge that could help him handle the situation.

"I know." She said with a kind smile that made him relax slightly. "I know family can be a little overwhelming, even if they're not yours. I just wanted to make sure you're alright." Jim shrugged again.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just wanted a little space." He nodded back to the door. "Seems like Spock's the one who really needs your concern. They're all over him out there." Amanda chuckled.

"He'll be fine; he's had plenty of time to prepare himself for this moment." Her smile faded and she became serious. "Thanks to you, he'll have plenty of time to go through it again." Jim felt his face heat up.

"Yeah, well…" he trailed off uncertainly. She smiled kindly again.

"Don't worry. I'm not going to ask you to give me any details or promises that you won't try to ruin Spock's life. It's clear from the fact that he brought you here that he trusts you to see the situation for what it was and see how sincerely sorry he is." She sighed. "I'm sorry too. I know there's no changing what happened, but it still upsets me that you were put through that, and what happened before it. But I'm afraid all I can do is thank you for saving my son's life, wish you well, and offer my own support if you ever find yourself in need of help."

"Okay." Said Jim, not knowing what else he could say. It was pretty clear where Spock got his kind nature from. She gave him another smile.

"Well, I suppose I've left Spock on his own for long enough. I'm glad we got a chance to talk." With that, she walked back out into the living room, leaving Jim alone with his thoughts.

* * *

><p>After two grueling hours of speaking to his extended family, they finally excused themselves. Stonn had wandered outside at some point with the excuse of having a firsthand look at some of Earth's native plants. Jim was either still hiding in the kitchen or had moved to some other part of the house without Spock's knowledge. Spock decided to find him to let him know that the visit was over.<p>

He started toward the kitchen but stopped when he heard the sound of rustling pages in his mother's library. He stepped into the open doorway and was transfixed by the sight of Jim holding a book in his hands as if it were a delicate treasure. He could have stood there watching Jim read the book all day, but the worry that Jim might turn and catch him staring prompted him to clear his throat, announcing his arrival. Jim's head snapped up and he closed the book.

"Oh! Sorry, I was just having a look around."

"It is alright." Assured Spock. "Do you have an interest in paper books?"

"Yeah." Admitted Jim, looking a little less worried. "My dad collected them. His grandparents were historians, and he inherited a big collection from them. A lot of Kirks have contributed to it for a couple hundred years now. Most of them are in storage, but I keep a whole bunch of my favorites in the library at home."

"I believe my mother's family had a similar tradition. They also passed along other heirlooms, and even family names. According to the family tree, there have been seven Amanda's in the last three centuries."

"My family does that too sometimes." Replied Jim. "I was named after both of my grandfathers." His nose wrinkled a bit. "I'm just lucky I got my mother's dad first." Spock sent him a questioning look and he added, "My dad's father was named Tiberius." Spock had to admit, that was an unusual name for a human, outside of ancient Rome at least.

"Did your great-grandparents choose the name because of their careers?" He asked curiously.

"Yeah." Replied Jim. "They really loved history." He looked around briefly and placed the book back in its place on the shelf. "Is it time to go?"

"Yes." Replied Spock reluctantly. "We will have to return to the ship in order for Healer Fer'at to perform the procedure." Jim nodded, looking a little uncertain.

"Okay." He said quietly. Spock turned and led the way out. His mother saw them to the door.

"I'll see you later Spock." She promised.

"I apologize for not staying longer." He said. She smiled.

"That's alright sweetheart. We'll have the whole trip back to Vulcan to catch up. Just take care of your friend for right now." She turned her warm smile on Jim. "Take care Jim, and remember, if you need anything I'll be more than happy to help."

"Thanks." Said Jim, acknowledging her words with a nod. He followed Spock out.

* * *

><p>Amanda watched them go with a sigh. It was clear Spock was already attached to his mate, however unexpected their bonding had been. She had no idea how she was going to deal with Spock and the aftermath of the bond-breaking. She knew very little about the process, but she knew it wouldn't be pleasant. Spock might become despondent. She would want to be there for him, but she had no idea how to help him recover from a broken bond or worse, a broken heart.<p>

And Jim, he seemed like such a nice young man. He didn't deserve any of what was happening to him, before or after he met Spock. He actually seemed to like Spock. She couldn't help but wonder what it would have been like for them if they'd met before Jim's kidnapping and Spock's premature Time. Perhaps they would have become friends. Perhaps they would have even fallen in love. But that wasn't the case.

Amanda knew all she could really do was be ready to support her son in the fallout from what was to come. It was a shame though. The two of them would have made a nice-looking couple.

* * *

><p>Jim boarded the shuttle with Spock and Stonn, who was protectively holding one case with some snicker doodles and another holding something Amada had said was for his wife. He couldn't fight the sense of unease that was growing stronger and stronger as they drew closer to the ship. He told himself it was just because he had no idea what it was going to be like for him. And he had to admit, he was worried about what it would be like for Spock too. In all honesty, he liked the guy. He might have even been able to consider him a friend under different circumstances.<p>

The shuttle docked and Spock beckoned to Jim to follow him to sickbay

When they got there, Healer Fer'at and Sarek were already waiting for them.

"Are you ready?" Asked the healer. Jim glanced at Spock and met his eyes briefly before nodding in unison.

"Yeah, let's do it." Fer'at gestured at two chairs and they both sat down. He sat in a third one setting between theirs. He reached out one hand for Spock's meld points, then another for Jim's. With no warning, Jim suddenly found himself in a similar situation as when Spock had first melded with him, at least sensation-wise. There was something unnervingly different though.

He was uncomfortably aware of the healer searching through his mind. It was quick and efficient, and he was obviously very good at his job, but it didn't change the fact that it all felt very wrong to Jim. He wondered if Spock was feeling the same way.

It was as if his thoughts suddenly turning to Spock was some kind of key. He became aware of something, something bright and pulsing and so very much _alive_ connecting him to Spock. And just as he had suddenly become aware of it, he also became aware of the fact that the healer had found exactly what he was looking for. Jim felt a pair of mental hands take hold of the bond and begin to pull and was almost completely overcome by a wave of terror. Without even any effort, he felt his mind lash out against the presence trying to rip the bond apart. To his great surprise the unwelcome presence retreated, and Jim abruptly found himself back in the real world. In the other chairs, Spock and the healer both looked as startled and out of breath as he felt. Sarek stepped forward.

"Is it done?" He asked sounding both anxious and impatient under his cool tone. "Is the bond broken?"

"No." Replied the healer curtly. "The connection is strong, stronger even than what I first believed, and both of them began to fight me when I attempted to break it." Jim glanced at Spock, feeling a little relieved that it wasn't just him who was affected by the attempt. But that meant that they were still stuck together. Spock was going to have to go back to Vulcan soon, and Jim had no intention of doing anything other than going home to Riverside and staying there for a very, _very_ long time.

"What must be done to allow the breaking?" Asked Sarek, sounding impatient now.

"I have never encountered a bond as strong as this." Admitted the Fer'at. "It would be possible, but only with extensive mental exercises used by Spock and, to some extent, Mr. Kirk. It would take time, and they would have to remain close to each other."

"How much time?" Asked Spock, almost sounding wary. Fer'at considered.

"At least a month. Perhaps more, given the strength of your bond."

"We are scheduled to return to Vulcan in two days." Said Sarek. "If the bond cannot be broken before then, Mr. Kirk will have to return with us."

"Now, wait just a second!" Snapped Jim, finally finding his voice again. "I didn't agree to come back to Earth with you just so you could drag me off to Vulcan. You promised me I'd be free to go home!" The last sentence was laced with accusation, and it was directed at everyone, including Spock. Sarek appeared unconcerned.

"We did not know what the circumstances would be then. The only option is for you to accompany us to Vulcan. You will have to remain with Spock until the bond can be broken."

"No!" Snapped Jim angrily. He was so close to home, and now everything was falling apart. "I'm sick of waiting. I'm not going to Vulcan." Sarek started to reply.

"You have no choice-"

"Yes he does." Interrupted Spock. "If time is what is needed, then I will stay on Earth." Jim was stunned. Spock was offering to stay so that he could?

"Spock." Said Sarek sternly. Spock turned to Jim.

"Jim, could you perhaps return to our quarters? I believe you should rest, and I must speak with my father alone." Jim just nodded and walked out of the room as quickly as he could without looking like he was running away.

* * *

><p>Sarek waited until Healer Fer'at left the room.<p>

"This is most unwise Spock." He said sternly. Spock stared at him coolly.

"I understand that you do not approve, Father." He said quietly. "However it is not fair for Jim to be dragged unwillingly to Vulcan simply because it is of convenience to you." Sarek looked startled.

"I am not doing this for my convenience. I was simply attempting to do what is in your best interest." Had Spock been raised human, he might have snorted.

"My best interest?" He asked bitterly. "Is that why you groomed me so thoroughly for the VSA? Why you instructed me to deny my mother the simplest affectionate gestures she pretends not to crave? Why, for my entire life, any hint of a trait that was not considered Vulcan enough for your tastes was pounced on an drilled out of me when you were allowed to indulge yourself by marrying and breeding with a human woman? While you ignore your own imperfections like a hypocrite?"

"Spock." Said Sarek, sounding stunned. "Everything I have ever done has been for your benefit, so that you could have the best possible life that I could offer you."

"Was it really?" Asked Spock, shocking Sarek speechless. "Was it really for _me_?" He turned toward the door to leave.

"What will you do on Earth?" Asked Sarek, as if he was trying to stall his son's departure. "What will you do while you are working toward breaking the bond?" Spock turned back to him.

"I do not know." He admitted. "If anything, perhaps I will take the time to explore my human side. It is, as they would put it, long overdue." With that he walked out, leaving Sarek speechless behind him.

* * *

><p>Spock felt emotionally drained as he arrived back at his quarters. He too felt the need for rest. Their luggage was already on the shuttle, so there was no harm in them resting for a few hours. Indeed that might be safer than simply going straight to the shuttle right after such an exhausting experience. He opened the door to the room, assuming Jim would be asleep already.<p>

As he rounded the corner, he was startled to see that Jim was lying on the bed, wide awake and staring at the ceiling.

"Is something wrong?" He asked concerned? Jim shrugged.

"I'm just thinking." He met Spock's gaze. "Was your dad upset?"

"He was not pleased." Admitted Spock, sitting down on his own bed. Jim looked back up at the ceiling.

"Did you mean what you said? Are you really going to stay on Earth until the bond is broken?"

"Yes." He said simply. "I promised you that you would be returned home, and I intend to keep that promise."

"Thanks." Said Jim quietly. "And I'm sorry I assumed you were lying to me."

"I take no offense." Spock assured him, reclining back on the bed. Jim suddenly turned on his side to face him.

"Did you even think about what you're gonna do when we get there?" He asked, looking concerned.

"I did not." Admitted Spock, slowly turning to face him as well. "I suppose I can find lodging easily enough. Is there a hotel close to where you live?"

"Not really." Said Jim. He seemed to think about something for a moment. "I guess…I've got a pretty decent guest room." Spock was surprised.

"Are you certain?" He asked. "Would it make you uncomfortable at all to have me staying in your home?" Jim gave a one-shouldered shrug.

"I don't know why it would. We've been staying in this same room together for a week and it hasn't bothered me at all. Besides, it's the least I can do after you offered your hospitality to me." Spock considered it.

"I accept your offer." He said. "Thank you, Jim."

"No problem." Jim replied with a smile. Then he frowned a little again.

"Why's your dad so upset about you staying here for a while? Is there something you're supposed to be doing back on Vulcan?" Spock hesitated. His Vulcan upbringing insisted that he keep this to himself, but he trusted Jim.

"Only my father's attempts to mold me into the perfect Vulcan." He could have cursed at how bitter he sounded.

"Why would he expect you to be a perfect Vulcan? I mean, you're half human. Doesn't he expect you to do human stuff too?" Spock shook his head.

"At a young age, my father instructed me to choose one way of life over the other. As I was living on Vulcan, surrounded by Vulcans, and saw no change to the situation anytime soon, I found it only logical to choose to be Vulcan. But my father goes further than that; any mannerism he detects in me that does not seem completely Vulcan to him is stamped out of me. He ignored acts done against me and instead always focused on my response. I sometimes wonder…" he stopped, wondering if he should continue.

"What?" Asked Jim, curious to know. Spock continued speaking.

"Before my father married my mother, he formed a temporary bond to a Vulcan woman, T'Rea, who was the equivalent of a princess. Their brief union resulted in a child, without my father's knowledge. She had no intention of involving him in the child's life, as her views differed drastically from his. She did not follow the teachings of Surak, and intended to pass those beliefs on to her children.

She was allowed to divorce him on the grounds that she intended to become a priestess, which is considered the most noble pursuit for a Vulcan. She gave birth to her son, my half-brother Sybok in the seclusion of the monastery at Gol. She died when Sybok was a child, and that was when my father learned of his existence and brought him into his home. He was already married to my mother, and I was an infant. My mother was more than happy to have him in their home. They were quite close, as she had no trouble giving him affection similar to the way his own mother did.

As I was growing up, there was often much conflict between my father and Sybok. My father could not alter his beliefs, and it caused much strain in our household. Sybok also encouraged me to rebel, to fight back against my school bullies and ignore things my father told me. When I was ten years old, he left home, stating that he could not remain there anymore. I begged him to take me with him, but he said I could not come. I have not seen or heard from him since. My mother and I both missed him terribly, but my father simply forbade that we ever speak of him again."

"Damn." Muttered Jim. "That's harsh. But what does it have to do with your dad trying to make you a perfect Vulcan?"

"Many of my father's peers looked down on him because of Sybok's nature. Even though it was a result of his mother's teachings, many believed that my father should have been able to steer him the 'proper' way. They saw it as a failure on his part. There were also many who looked down on him for marrying and reproducing with a human. I have often wondered if his reason for being so strict with me is meant to prove that he is not responsible for the way his first son turned out. Perhaps he thought if he could raise a half human to be even better than full-blooded Vulcans, he would no longer be seen as a failure where Sybok's upbringing was concerned, and perhaps others would stop frowning on the fact that he married a human. That in truth, every lesson he has given me has been for his own benefit."

"Man." Murmured Jim. "I thought I had issues with how I was raised, but that's just crap." Spock almost sighed.

"I have found great dissatisfaction with it for years, but my desire to keep my father content has prevented me from doing anything about it before now. I suppose this is what humans refer to as unconditional love." Jim shrugged.

"Yeah, maybe." Spock studied him.

"Do you know of another reason?"

"No, I guess not." Said Jim. "I'm just not sure there is such a thing."

"As what?" Asked Spock, confused.

"You know, unconditional love. I mean, when you think about it, you can always find some reason for loving someone."

"You do not believe in unconditional love?" Asked Spock, feeling a little sick at the thought. Such a belief was one of the better emotional qualities humanity had to offer.

"Well, look at it this way; why do you love your mother."

"Because-"

"Exactly!" Said Jim, sitting up as he cut Spock off. "If it was really unconditional, there wouldn't be a 'because'. Even if it's just because she's your mom, that's still a reason. If you didn't know her, if she was just some person you passed in the street, you wouldn't think of her as someone you love."

"Perhaps." Admitted Spock slowly. "Do you not have similar feelings for your own mother?"

"Not really." Admitted Jim quietly. He lay back again and stared up at the ceiling. "She hardly ever acted like a mother to me. She certainly didn't act like she loved me, always dumping me on someone else so she could go back into space. And then sending me away like that. She acted like she regretted it, but she never tried to talk to me about it. The only time she ever mentioned it was when she was dying of cancer. I went to visit her in the hospital and she begged me to forgive her for all of it, especially sending me to Tarsus IV. I told her I didn't hate her, and that I could forgive her for everything. And it was all a lie. I couldn't forgive her then, and I still can't now."

"You do not love your mother at all?" Asked Spock, feeling a little helpless as he watched Jim stare blankly at the ceiling.

"I guess maybe I feel something for her. What most people call unconditional love, I see as more of an obligation. You're supposed to love your mother, so you do even if she doesn't do anything to deserve it. I guess that's why even though a part of me wanted to say that I hated her, I lied to her instead. I mean, what kind of son tells his dying mother something like that?"

"Someone who is cruel." Said Spock quietly. "You are not cruel, Jim." Jim shrugged.

"I guess not. I've just never really loved anyone, except maybe my brother, and he left me too. I came close another time, but it didn't work out."

"Will you tell me about it?" Spock asked without thinking. But Jim answered him.

"I met this girl named Ruth when I was eighteen. I'd been on my own for a while already. She was seventeen, rich, and the prettiest girl I'd ever met. Anyone would have thought she was out of my league, including me. I couldn't believe my luck that a girl like that be interested in a guy like me. I was crazy about her. I thought I was really in love with her. I was planning to save up enough to buy a ring and propose to her." Spock felt himself tense up a little at the thought of Jim wanting to marry some faceless girl he'd never met.

"Anyway, it turned out she really wasn't interested in me. You see, I was pretty wild then. I was the worst nightmare of every father with a teenage daughter, and Ruth wanted to go to Risa with her friends for their spring break. When her dad said no, she started sleeping with me, saying that she'd just spend her spring break with me instead. To him, Risa looked pretty good in comparison, so he told her she could go if she stopped seeing me, just like she planned. She broke up with me without any warning, and I was so desperate that I asked her to marry me right then and there. She laughed in my face and told me about her plan, and how it would take more than just having a pretty face and being good in bed for me to be 'worthy' of someone like her. She walked out of my life after that. Since then, I've made sure to only sleep with girls who are just looking for a good night and nothing else." He shrugged. "I guess that seems pretty racy to a Vulcan.

"You had your heart broken." Said Spock quietly. "No one could blame you for wanting to avoid it happening again." Jim sighed.

"Yeah. You know, she wasn't all that interesting, or even fun. Sometimes I think all I really loved is what I thought she was."

"What was that?" Asked Spock. Jim shrugged again.

"Someone who loved me."

For a moment, Spock actually thought he felt his heart breaking in his side. Jim's emotions had been manipulated and disregarded so many times that he could not bring himself to love anyone. Oblivious to Spock's thoughts, he rubbed a hand over his eyes.

"I'm gonna try to get some sleep if you don't mind."

"Of course." Said Spock, fighting to hide his emotional turmoil. Jim rolled over so he was facing the partition and his breathing eventually slowed.

Spock lay there staring at the ceiling. He couldn't understand how that girl could use Jim like that, and how his family could pass him around and abandon him at their convenience and leave him so damaged. Jim was a gentle soul, with an incredible intellect and a spirit that called to his own. If there was anyone who deserved to know how it felt to be loved, it was him

And just like that, Spock came to a decision. He didn't know if he loved Jim, or if Jim could love him, but with a bond as strong as theirs, it had to be possible. He was going to Earth with Jim. In that time, he would follow Stonn's advice on courtship and show Jim the benefits of the life they could have together. And maybe, just maybe, Jim would accept him.

His mind made up, he closed his eyes to get some rest. Soon, he would be taking Jim home, and probably sending a message to Stonn to ask him more about courtship. And then he would start wooing Jim.

* * *

><p><strong>I can't even begin to apologize for how late this is, but hopefully all the drama helps make up for it. I've been busy with work filling in for people who called in sick, stuff at home, and then getting miserably sick myself from overworking. I don't know when the next chapter will be up, but I'll try to make it sooner than this! Thanks to everyone who's been waiting on me. See you next time!<strong>


	14. Chapter 14

**So sorry about the lateness. It seems to be getting harder and harder to pick things up. But I got some inspiration from the fact that there are people who are still reading and reviewing my stories, so I figure I owe you all this. Today, Jim and Spock begin to settle into life together for the foreseeable future. This chapter has a couple of important conversations and a little something you'll probably hate me for.**

* * *

><p>Chapter Fourteen<p>

Jim was woken by a tentative hand on his shoulder. He opened his eyes easily enough and looked up at Spock.

"Is it time to leave?" He asked, feeling awake already. The prospect of returning home was more than enough to chase the sleep away.

"Yes." Said Spock, stepping back to allow him to stand. Jim got up, stretched briefly, then followed Spock out the door. They walked down the halls toward the docking bay one last time. They boarded and Spock waited for the all clear before taking off. Jim took the opportunity to admire the ship one more time. It was a fine ship, and Jim had seen a few impressive looking ships being built back home. It was too bad Vulcans weren't interested in building for Starfleet, they'd make some beauties.

Jim then let his mind go back to the fact that he was really almost home. He could already see them descending over the North American continent, and larger objects like buildings were coming into focus. He began eagerly looking for familiar sights as he vaguely heard Spock communicating with the local authorities to get clearance to land. He saw Riverside Shipyards, and the dull gleam coming from the unpolished frame of the current work in progress, the name of which he didn't know yet. Then he saw the farm.

He never thought he'd be so happy to see the old patch of dirt again. As the shuttle landed, he felt himself twitching in his seat, the energy he'd seemed to lack toward the end of his journey returning to him. As soon as the shuttle was powered down, Jim was out of his seat and standing at the entrance before the door was even opening. He actually hopped off the ramp before it was fully descended. He stopped and stood perfectly still, absorbing every sight, sound, and smell.

"Home, sweet home." He whispered. He started toward the house, then remembered the fact that he still had baggage and a guest in the shuttle behind him. He turned back to see Spock coming down the ramp with his baggage and setting it down on the ground. "Sorry." He said sheepishly. "I got a little ahead of myself."

"It is of no consequence." Assured Spock. "It is understandable that you would be eager to see your home again after your ordeal."

"Yeah." Agreed Jim, shifting around. "Well hey, you wanna grab your stuff and I'll show you around the house?"

"Very well." Said Spock agreeably. He went back into the shuttle and retrieved his own luggage. Jim noticed for the first time that he didn't have much with him.

"You don't have a lot there." He remarked as he gathered up his own bags. "Are you sure you have enough to last for a month?"

"I do not believe so." Admitted Spock, looking thoughtful. "I only planned to have enough clothing for the voyage and other supplies for three days here. On the ship I was able to replicate hygiene products and had my research to occupy me."

"That's okay." Assured Jim. "I can take you into town later and help you stock up, or you can just use what I've got in the house. Either way, I'll have to go shopping. I was planning on being gone for about a week, so I didn't bother getting any more perishables. Also, I really need to clean up and catch up on my chores. I paid some of my neighbors to look after the outdoor stuff, but I want to get back into habit right away." Spock seemed surprised.

"You sound as if you have much to do." He remarked. Jim chuckled.

"Well, yeah! A farm is never-ending work." He frowned. "Speaking of work, I'll have to talk to my boss about my job. Pike told me he'd take care of giving people an explanation for why I didn't come back on time, but that doesn't mean he won't have decided to replace me permanently."

"What will you do if that is the case?" Asked Spock, looking a little concerned. Jim shrugged.

"I've got enough put away so that I should be alright until I find something else. I can always go for a job in computer repair, or really any kind of repair. I'm pretty good with technology. Or I can do bartending. Or find another mechanic job. Or just do odd jobs for anyone who'll hire me. I've always managed to get by." Jim led him over to the door and typed the code into the keypad by the door. "I'll tell you all the codes so you can let yourself in and out." Jim promised as the door opened. He inhaled deeply, breathing in the familiar scent of old-fashioned woodwork and dusty curtains. He turned around to see Spock standing in the doorway, looking around the room curiously. He felt a strange feeling again. Something about seeing Spock standing there made him feel…he wasn't sure what he felt about this. It didn't feel like a _bad_ thing.

* * *

><p>Spock studied his new surroundings curiously. There was something, a warmth about the cheerily decorated kitchen. If the kitchen was any indication, the house was clearly well cared for and valued by its occupant. He met Jim's eyes.<p>

"I'll show you where the guest room is." He said. "You can get settled in while I clean up a little. There should be enough food left in the house for tonight, and we can go shopping for whatever we need. I'll show you around after I've had a chance to clear some of this dust out." Jim led him through the hallways to a plainly decorated room with some slightly battered old furniture and a comm unit that was perhaps a few years behind the trend.

"I know it's nothing fancy, but there's plenty of space and its quiet. I know there's no replicator or anything, but the kitchen's always open if you need something."

"This is perfect for any of my needs." Spock assured him. "All I require is a space to sleep, meditate, and store my possessions. I am most grateful to have these needs met." Jim shrugged awkwardly.

"Yeah, well, I'd be a lousy host if I didn't do that." He jerked his head toward the door. "I'll just leave you to settle in. I'm gonna get unpacked and start cleaning up." With that, he left Spock alone in what was going to be his new room for the next month, at least. He sat down on the bed, taking a moment to think what he should do next. So far, things seemed to be going well. Jim's home seemed comfortable, and Jim seemed to feel fine about having him here. He'd clearly done well for himself in spite of having such a difficult childhood. It comforted Spock to know that Jim had adjusted as well as he had.

Still, the thought of Jim living all alone in this house on this land was rather saddening. So was the way Jim spoke of 'getting by'. Jim was clearly used to fending for himself. Spock wondered if that would make it easier or harder to prove his worth as a mate.

Jim's independence might make him hunger for someone to share his life with, someone to help him shoulder his burdens. On the other hand, he might see asking for help as a sign of weakness. He'd asked for help in the brothel, but that had been a desperate outcry prompted by fear and hopelessness. Now that he was back in his comfort zone, he might not be interested in accepting assistance from anyone, only resuming his independent lifestyle.

Spock set about taking out his few possessions, easily finding places for them in the closet and dresser. He also emptied the few toiletries he'd brought for his time planetside. He began making a mental list of things he'd need when he and Jim went into town for supplies. He was rather concerned about the weather. He didn't know much about the local climate, but he was fairly certain that snow fell here, and might while he was staying with Jim. If he really wanted to stay with Jim, he was going to have to prepare himself for the climate and how to deal with it. It also occurred to him that he might need to find himself employment. He couldn't very well help himself to Jim's money. He believed that humans enjoyed a partnership in romantic relationships, but not to be too dependent on said partner, and vice versa.

He was pulled from his musings by the sound of a machine coming to life. He realized it was the sound of a vacuum cleaner. He opened the door and looked out in the hallway. Jim was steadily pushing the machine across the carpet. He looked up and saw Spock watching.

"Hey." He said over the whine. Then he looked down at the vacuum and shut it off. "Oh, is the noise bothering you?"

"Not at all." Replied Spock. "I did not realize you used this antiquated form of cleaning device." Jim shrugged carelessly.

"I've had it around for a while, and I don't use it that often."

"Do you not have a modified ventilation system to clean dust from the house?" Asked Spock. That was the typical way now; to have vents that sucked up dust and sent it to an enclosed incinerator instead of allowing it to settle on the surfaces of the house.

"Yeah, but I've been gone a few weeks now and I don't want to overwork it. Feeding too much dust or lint into it at once has been known to cause the fire to spread into the vents. So I'm getting some of it up the old fashioned way first. I have a timer for it, but I didn't want to add too much to the power bill, so I just left it off while I was gone." He looked at his surroundings wistfully. "I was gone a lot longer than I meant to be." Spock felt a pang of sorrow. If he had to guess what Jim was thinking, it would be that he had been afraid that he would not see his home again.

"Your home is larger than I expected." He said quietly. "Would you care for some help with your cleaning?" Jim looked surprised, but shook his head.

"No, it's okay. I know how to get it done fast and you're not really dressed for it." Spock knew what he meant; Jim was dressed very casually in a faded shirt and jeans, clothing that didn't matter as much if it was dirtied. Spock knew he probably looked overdressed in comparison. While he tried to think of a reply, Jim spoke again.

"Have you thought about what you might need when we go into town?" Spock nodded.

"To put it briefly, everything." Jim grinned at him sympathetically.

"Yeah, you'll pretty much have to start from scratch." He commented. Spock cocked his head to one side.

"What must I scratch, and why must I start by doing so?" He asked, confused. Jim stared at him a moment, then began laughing.

"It doesn't…you don't have to scratch anything." Jim managed to get his breathing back under control. "It's just an expression that means, in this case, that you don't have any of the stuff you need for a long stay, just a short one, so you have to get it all before you can start settling in. Starting with nothing but the bare minimum, basically."

"I see." Said Spock thoughtfully. "That description would be accurate for my situation. However, perhaps it would be logical to wait until tomorrow to begin shopping for such things. Surely you wish to rest before taking on such a strenuous task." Jim shrugged.

"I think I did enough resting on the ship. But you're probably right about waiting until tomorrow for the shopping. I can take today to clean up the house and get settled back in, there's no point in putting that off. There should be enough food in the fresher unit for tonight. I don't keep a lot of vegetarian stuff, but I should be able to throw something together."

"Of course." Said Spock. He was troubled though. Jim was already pulling away from his offers of help. He was referring to doing most things on his own. Cleaning the house, doing the farm work, cooking the meals. He clearly wasn't expecting any help. And Spock wasn't sure how hard he should push to convince Jim that he truly wished to help, and that he could. On Vulcan, guests were expected to take care of some household chores in exchange for their place in the house. He also thought that long term guests in Earth homes were expected to do something to earn their keep, since their continued presence would be a drain on the hosts finances. He had no desire to be a burden. He decided to start with something small and logical.

"You have told me you are not familiar with vegetarian cuisine. Perhaps I could at least prepare my own meal so you need not concern yourself." Again, Jim looked surprised. Any offer of assistance seemed to be met with such, and it made Spock ache in a way that he'd never experienced before. Jim, oblivious to his thoughts, shrugged.

"I guess that makes sense. No one knows what you like better than you. If you even find something you like in there."

"I am certain I will." Assured Spock. "I mean no insult to you; I simply wish to contribute something while I am staying here. The least I can do is cook my own food and clean my own space." Jim smiled and nodded.

"Deal." He stuck his hand out, surprising Spock. He realized that Jim probably didn't know the significance that hand touching held for Vulcans, and he wasn't going to pass up the opportunity. He took Jim's hand in his own.

"Deal." He replied, keeping his face calm as he secretly relished the feel of Jim's hand in his. They shook once and Spock was forced to let go. He struggled to think of something else. "This is a working farm, correct?"

"Sort of." Replied Jim. "I've got a horse, his name's Flash, but other than that I board barn and pasture space to some neighbors of mine, for their milk cows. I do the same for some other neighbors sheep. My actual thing here is crops."

"What do you grow?" Asked Spock, thinking he might be able to focus on the agriculture a little.

"Sunflowers." Replied Jim. "I grow them and harvest their seeds. Then I sell them to companies who get them and take them to be made into other products to sell."

"Sunflowers." Said Spock, thoughtfully. "My mother has spoken of them. She enjoyed them greatly before she moved to Vulcan."

"Has anyone tried growing them there?" Asked Jim. "It's not hard at all." Spock shook his head.

"My mother knows that non-Vulcan things are not always welcomed there, not if it takes time that could be used on more certain projects to attempt to make them so. She does have an impressive rose garden though."

"That's cool." Said Jim. "I need to get to work. I'll show you around some more later." Jim turned back to his vacuum cleaner and Spock retreated into the guest bedroom to compose himself. The feel of Jim's skin against his had been wonderful.

* * *

><p>Jim had been as thorough as possible with the vacuuming, in spite of being in a hurry. He also dusted the larger surfaces of the house's furniture. He heard the door to the guest bedroom opening and Spock making his way quietly downstairs. He almost stepped into Spock's room, then hesitated. Spock might want his privacy. Plus, he'd said he'd prefer to take care of his own space, not wanting to impose too much. Jim decided to respect his wishes and let the room alone. He put away his cleaning tools and turned on the vent to finish the job. Then he headed to the kitchen.<p>

He was surprised to find a pleasant aroma wafting through the house. Spock had set the table for two, plates and silverware on opposite ends of the table. He'd prepared some kind of fruit salad for himself and had heated up a frozen dinner for Jim.

"I could not find anything suitable for a meal for you." He said, looking embarrassed. "I found several of these in the freezer; I hope it will suffice."

"That's fine." Said Jim, surprised. "I forgot I had those." He paused, then closed his eyes in frustration. "I also forgot that I was supposed to contact Pike as soon as I got back." Seeing Spock's confusion he added, "He said he'd contact Sam to let him know that I was home safe. He's already contacted him by now to give him _part_ of the story. He's just telling him that I was abducted, and probably where I was. I'm gonna explain the rest to him myself."

"I see." Said Spock slowly. Jim got the wrong idea from his response.

"Don't worry, I won't give him any specific details or anything. And I won't give away any secrets."

"I know." Said Spock. "You have already shown that you will not expose my private life, something I am very grateful for." Jim just nodded and went back to his meal. In truth, Spock had been concerned that Jim's brother would jump to conclusions just like everyone else and hate him. He knew that approval from close family members was very important in creating and maintaining a romantic relationship. He and Jim weren't remotely close to that yet, but he desperately wanted Jim's family to be receptive to the idea of him at least having Jim's friendship.

They finished their meals in silence. Jim got up to clear away the dishes, and Spock made a point of depositing his own plate into the dishwasher and wiping off the table while Jim set the wash and dry cycle. When they were done he put them away and looked over at Spock.

"I'm gonna go call Pike now and turn in." He said, gesturing to the stairs. "If you need anything for tonight, let me know, okay?"

"Of course, Jim." Replied Spock. "Goodnight."

Jim walked upstairs to his room and shut the door behind him. He had a feeling Pike wasn't going to be happy about the fact that his so-called rapist was staying with him for an undetermined amount of time. He stopped for a moment to think about the fact that Spock was in his house. He realized that the only concern he'd had about that fact so far was whether or not Spock was going to be comfortable here. He was determined to show the Vulcan the same consideration and hospitality that he'd been given on the ship. And right now, that was going to involve telling Pike that Spock was staying with him, whether he liked it or not. Jim programmed in the comm address Pike had given him. There was an answer almost immediately. There was a mixture of warmth and relief on the man's face as he appeared on Jim's monitor.

"Jim." He said in greeting. "I trust you made it home alright?" It was clear he was waiting to hear some negativity about his hosts. Geez, why was everyone looking for a Vulcan to blame?

"Yeah, I'm fine. There was a little change in plans though." Replied Jim.

"What do you mean?" Asked Pike, starting to look a little wary.

"Well, it turns out that Spock and I are full-on bonded." He let that sink in before continuing. "And then, it turned out to be so strong that their Healer couldn't break it. It's got some kind of weird protective ability or something. We have to stay together long enough to let it really settle and relax before we can try breaking it again. He's staying with me until then." Pike just stared at him before finding his words.

"Jim," he said slowly, as if speaking to a volatile animal, "do you really think this is a good idea? I'm sure you think you're doing the right thing here, but is it really a good idea to stay in such close quarters with Spock? You never know; he might not be as honorable as you think right now." Jim waited to make sure Pike was finished, taking several deep breaths before he spoke.

"You're entitled to your opinion, sir." He bit out. "But I trust him, and I don't see that changing for any reason. He was nothing but good to me on the ship, and we're not even sharing room anymore. And the only reason he offered to stay on Earth was because his dad just assumed I'd be cool with them dragging me to Vulcan to sit on my ass and wait until the bond could be broken. He and his dad had a huge fight about it and now they're not talking. If he hasn't earned my respect gratitude with everything else he's done, then he definitely has with this. He's staying in my house as long as he needs to and that's just how it's gonna be." Pike looked at him calculatingly before sighing and shaking his head.

"I can see there's no changing your mind this time either. I hope you're right about him; he sounds like he's really got you impressed." He changed the subject. "I contacted your brother on Deneva. I told him that you didn't arrive because your transport was hijacked and you were taken prisoner. I also told him where you were kept, but that you were unharmed. I said it would be up to you to share any more information on the subject. I'll contact him shortly to let him know that you're home, and then I'm sure he'll be in touch with you soon." He looked at Jim again. "Jim, I hope you realize I don't _want_ to be right in assuming the worst. I really do hope Spock is as good a man as you believe, and I hope everything works out alright for you. Take care son."

"I will." Said Jim quietly. He signed off and headed to the shower.

* * *

><p>Spock prepared himself for bed. He intended to use the shower in the morning. For now, all he wanted was to meditate briefly and go to sleep. He was more than a little nervous about what might happen the next day. What if Jim decided at some point that maybe he shouldn't be here? That he should leave his home or worse, his planet?<p>

Spock tried to calm himself. Jim was a good and rational man. He wouldn't just turn Spock out with no warning. But he was going to talk to his brother in the near future. It was likely that he brother, this Sam, would react similarly to the Starfleet personnel who'd helped rescue Jim from the brothel. He might hold Spock responsible for any trauma that Jim might have suffered. Hopefully Jim would stand up for him yet again. It amazed him how much he'd done that already.

Spock decided that he'd meditated enough and readied himself for bed. He settled under the covers, pleasantly surprised by how comfortable the bed was. He fell asleep to thoughts of how his day with Jim tomorrow might go.

* * *

><p>Jim stood in his kitchen, not really looking at anything. All he could do was stare in the direction of the wall and think about everything that had happened. Spock was upstairs in his guest bedroom and would be for God knew how long.<p>

_What if I made a huge mistake asking him to stay here?_ Wondered Jim. But he didn't even know just what he was so afraid of happening because of what he'd offered. It wasn't like Spock was going to suddenly turn around and try to have sex with him again, forcibly or otherwise. Everybody else seemed to think that Spock would turn on Jim and rape him (again, in some people's opinion). The only people who didn't seem to think that were the Vulcans who knew what was really going on, and they all seemed to think that if there was any trouble, it would come from Jim, like he would be some horrible influence on Spock.

As he pondered all of this, he heard the sound of creaking from the floor behind him. He turned in surprise and saw Spock slowly entering the kitchen.

"I heard noise and saw the light on." He said. Jim noticed he was wearing the same sleeping robe that he'd worn on board the ship, but it was hanging open on top, revealing the pale flesh of his chest. Jim realized he hadn't noticed how slender Spock was until now. But it was a firm kind of slender, and his appearance could only hint at the strength his body actually held.

Jim realized where his mind was going and almost physically shook his head to clear it, and would have if he hadn't known that Spock was standing right there.

"I couldn't sleep." He said with a shrug. Spock didn't ask for an explanation. Instead, he stepped closer to Jim.

"I too have had difficulty finding rest." He admitted. "When we shared quarters on the ship, I often thought about the intimacy we shared, and how odd it felt to have you there, just a few feet away from me." Jim shifted uncomfortably.

"Yeah, I guess it's a little awkward having someone you slept with hitch a ride home."

"You misunderstand." Said Spock. "I do not remember our entire encounter, but I do know that it was…pleasurable. I have never known anything as wondrous as what we experienced together. And to have you there, sleeping just mere feet away, yet so far out of my reach…it was distressing." Jim stopped moving as he backed into the table, unable to retreat any further.

"I don't-" he stopped as Spock held up a hand to silence him.

"Perhaps you consented to save both our lives, but can you honestly tell me you did not find it pleasurable? Have you given no thought to it, or what it might be like if you were to engage in such activities again, without the threat of rape, or death, or punishment?" He was practically on top of Jim now, his hands latched onto the table's edge on either side of Jim's body. "Why do you continue to fear me even though you know I will not hurt you?" He asked softly. "It cannot be because you fear pain." He stared intensely into Jim's eyes before pressing his lips over Jim's in a chaste but firm kiss. One of his hands ran up and down Jim's side in a caress that could only be described as teasing. He took advantage of Jim's gasp to push his tongue inside the other man's mouth.

Something in Jim snapped and he gave up pretending he didn't want it. He brought his hands up to cup Spock's face as he returned the kiss eagerly. Spock in turn wrapped his arms around Jim's torso and pulled them together tightly. He released Jim's mouth and began licking and sucking at his neck, almost exactly like he had during his fever. Jim just clutched at his shoulders and allowed him to do what he wanted. He groaned when Spock pulled away.

"There is no shame in pleasure, Jim." Whispered Spock. Jim shuddered as Spock's hot breath tickled his ear. "There is no reason to be afraid to feel it, or allow someone you care for to give it to you." Without warning, Jim suddenly found himself spun around and pressed against the table. Spock pressed against him and he shuddered again at the feel of a familiar hardness pressed against his ass, separated by nothing but the thin material of Spock's robe and Jim's sleep pants. Jim threw his head back as Spock's hot hand suddenly dipped into his pants and wrapped around his-

Jim shot up in bed with a gasp that strangled the moan coming from his mouth. The dream had been so real. Jim actually needed a minute to realize that he'd just been dreaming and that Spock was sleeping in the next room. In the next minute, he realized how chilled he was due to the sweat cooling on his body and…

Jim cursed, then clamped a hand over his mouth before he remembered that the walls were soundproofed. There was a large, rapidly cooling wet spot on the front of his sleep pants. Mortified, he stripped the pants off and threw them in the laundry basket. He hadn't been subject to wet dreams since he was a teenage boy entering puberty. And now he was having one about the guy he'd been forced to sleep with while imprisoned.

He looked at the clock beside his bed. It was nearly six in the morning, about time for him to wake up. Since there was no way he was going back to sleep, he shut off the alarm and got up and went into the bathroom to clean up before starting his day.

* * *

><p>Spock was awakened sometime in the early hours of the morning to the sound of movement in the hallway. He'd left the door open just slightly, and he heard the sound of Jim moving down the stairs. The smell of brewing coffee soon filled made it up the stairs and filled the house. Before too long, Spock heard the sound of the front door opening and closing. He rose from bed to look out the window. He saw Jim heading for the barn, wearing heavy, warm coveralls over his clothes. Spock could feel what humans considered a mild chill seeping through the glass of the window.<p>

Spock glanced at the clock; it was nearly six in the morning. Jim had only just arrived home and was already hard at work trying to make up for what he'd fallen behind on. It was clear Jim was a hard worker. He'd looked at Spock like he was crazy when he suggested putting off some of his work until the next day. His unwillingness to procrastinate was almost Vulcan in certain respects.

Spock decided to follow his example and selected some clothing before moving to the shower. Afterwards, he would dress, go downstairs, and eat some of the leftover fruit salad. Once Jim was finished with whatever it was he was working on, perhaps they would go shopping.

He realized he'd never copied the list of things he needed to his padd. He pulled it out and began typing rapidly. He would ask Jim just where he could procure everything he needed. Then, a thought gave him pause.

He had no idea how he was to afford anything. He had few credits of his own. He'd withdrawn some from the account his father had set up for him when he was a child, but that was it. The account itself was impressive, but should his father find him undeserving, he could be cut off from it already. Sarek might have chosen to deny him money for going against his will.

Spock fully intended to prove his worth to Jim by earning his keep, but that might take some time, and he didn't want to make himself look like a burden by relying on Jim to cover his expenses.

He forced himself to remain calm. He had enough to get him through this shopping trip. He would deal with any such problems as they came along.

* * *

><p>Jim finished cleaning out the barn after a couple hours. By then, it was well into morning, and he wasn't too tired yet. He'd been extremely thorough, and he knew it was mostly due to the fact that he was in no hurry to go back inside and face Spock after dreaming about nearly getting fucked over the kitchen table by him. Not to mention the fact that said dream made him come in his pants like a teenager.<p>

Still, he had to go back in at some point. He'd told Spock they would go shopping, and he wasn't going to break his promise just because he was confused about what he was feeling over the whole thing that happened between them. Yeah, he'd enjoyed the sex. He wasn't ashamed of that. It didn't mean he wanted it to happen again, or that he had any kind of interest in Spock.

Jim finally sucked it up and walked back to the house, breathing in the crisp morning air that was typical of the transition from summer to autumn. He entered the living room and saw Spock sitting primly on the couch. He stood up as soon as their eyes met.

"Good morning Jim." He said cordially.

"Hey." He said, somewhat at a loss as for what to say to him. What do you say to someone you had your first wet dream in years about? "I didn't know when you were gonna get up."

"I was woken by the sound of your bedroom door." Said Spock calmly. "I do not mean to presume, but I believe it would be best to begin shopping for supplies early, as I do not know how long it will take to gather everything I need."

"No, you're right; we should get an early start. Groceries won't take too long. Toiletries shouldn't take too long either. The big thing is gonna be clothes. Do you know your sizes? On a human scale, I mean."

"I do not." Said Spock, looking a little troubled.

"Then you might have to guess and experiment a little. We don't have a lot in Riverside, but there's a Wal-Mart, and they should have something that'll work for you. If not, we can always travel to a town with a few more options after we're done with the other stuff."

"Very well." Said Spock with a nod. "Shall we prepare to leave?" He gave no indication that he might have overheard any noise Jim had made during his dream.

"Sure." He said. "Let me grab a jacket and get my keys." As he turned to do just that, he sent a silent thanks to whatever deity that might be listening that his grandfather's interest in history had been directed at classic heavy metal and had driven his great grandparents to soundproof the walls in the bedrooms.

* * *

><p>Spock could feel the chill in the air on his exposed skin. He was wearing thermal undergarments, but the approaching autumn season was not being kind to him. He vaguely recalled that it had been cooler in Canada, but the fact that he'd been outside for all of five minutes had allowed him to ignore it.<p>

Jim owned a truck that was at least ten years past being new. It seemed to have been well-maintained though, so there was no problem. It had a spacious cabin with a wide front seat section and a bench that could fit three in the background. The large bed in the back was topped by a removable cover. It was a good vehicle for transporting heavy things. He had the heat on low, so the temperature was a little more bearable. Spock began thinking about where Jim said they were going. He had heard of Wal-Mart before; several planets had such stores, but he had never been to one.

"Do you believe we will be able to find everything we need at Wal-Mart?" He asked, wondering where else they might be headed.

"Most of it." Replied Jim. "I do need to get some stuff for my animals though. I'll stop by the mill first to pick up some feed and straw for the start of the colder months."

"Will the owners of the cows and sheep you board be reimbursing you for those expenses?" Spock asked.

"For part of them." Replied Jim. "Some of it's for my horse too. I'll have to introduce you to him later, so he'll know who you are and won't be nervous when he sees you around. But the hay's for in the barn, when the ground gets slushy, and the feed's for when there's not so much nutrition left in the grass. There it is." Spock looked up and saw a large building with a sign that said 'Riverside Mill.' Jim found a spot and parked the truck.

"I'll be right back." He said, getting out of the truck. He moved up some steps to what appeared to be a loading dock and began speaking to a worker. After a moment, they disappeared inside. A few minutes later, they reappeared, Jim with a receipt in hand, and they, with some other workers, began loading bags of feed and bales of straw into the bed of the truck. Spock could tell from the way the truck rocked as the bags were thrown in that they were quite heavy, at least by human standards. It was rather clear that Jim didn't need to visit a gym to keep his attractive physique; it came naturally from long days of hard work.

Jim got back into the cab of the truck and started it up again. He pulled out of the parking lot and, after a few minutes, Spock began to see more homes, then stores and restaurants. Finally, Jim pulled into a large, crowded parking lot in front of a large building. He pulled as close to the entrance as he could and they both got out.

"This is Wal-Mart?" Spock asked, taking in the large building.

"Yup." Said Jim. "If you need everything at once, this is the place to come get it." He led Spock through the other vehicles and into the building. The first thing Spock registered as he stepped through the automatic sliding doors was _cold_. Wal-Mart had excellent air conditioning, and it threatened to cause noticeable discomfort to his hands and face. He supposed to humans, the chill was a relief, especially if they were hard workers like Jim. The first thing they did was get carts. Jim insisted on two since they were going to be getting a lot. Then, he allowed himself to be directed to a section selling clothing. Most of it was season appropriate for humans, but some of the warmer, winter clothing was being sold already. Spock headed straight for those.

"What size do you think I should try?" He asked Jim. Jim looked at the clothing speculatively.

"You're taller than me, so obviously you'll need long pants. You're thinner than me though, so you might want to start a size smaller than mine." He made a few selections and handed them to Spock. He also moved over to long sleeved shirts and selected a few of those as well. "Here," he said, handing them over, "You can only take six items at a time. Anything you like, just put in the cart. Whatever you don't like, you can leave at the desk and they'll it hang up later. Just try to get a feel for what you might like." He stopped suddenly, his cheeks turning pink as he gestured toward an aisle a few meters away. "You might want to check out the socks and underwear and stuff. We can look at shoes later. While you're trying on stuff, I'll go start getting non-food groceries. I'll be back in about thirty minutes, okay?"

"Certainly." Replied Spock. He watched Jim turn and leave. He considered the way Jim had flushed when he mentioned underwear. Was it possible he was thinking about Spock being naked? Or what he might look like in nothing but a pair of underwear? It was an intriguing possibility. For now though, he was going to focus on finding some clothes for his stay. He turned to the desk to wait to be shown to a changing stall.

* * *

><p>Jim grabbed his cart and hurried off to start getting other things. He had a list, and it was going to take him a little while to get everything on it. He fumed silently as he made his way through the aisles. He couldn't believe the way he'd acted! Blushing like a damn virgin trying to talk about underwear. He had blushed at the sight of bras when he was first starting to notice his female classmates developing bodies, but the thought of Spock in nothing but a pair of black boxer briefs…it was like being an awkward thirteen-year-old all over again.<p>

Jim started getting average things, things he really already had but would need more of now that someone else was living under his roof with him. Paper towels, laundry detergent, garbage bags, and other things. After he'd gathered all the things he didn't need to worry about spoiling, he headed on back to the clothing section. He saw Spock standing by his cart, which was heaped with clothing.

"Okay." He said, with a smile. "I guess that should do it." He looked at the employee there. "Is it okay if we leave this here? We've got some more stuff to buy."

"Sure." Said the woman with a shrug.

"Alright." With that, Jim began putting the other things he'd got into Spock's cart. "This way, we'll have plenty of room for whatever food we get." He explained.

"That would be logical." Said Spock agreeably. Once all the items were in The cart of clothes, they headed to the grocery section. Jim started selecting canned items, and Spock made some selections of his own. They proceeded to do the same with cereal, bread, and some snack items. Then they reached the fruit and vegetables, Jim showed Spock how to spot the good produce and they stocked up. When they were finally finished, they went to the checkout. The cashier began scanning their items and putting them into bags. Then, once Jim had paid for all the items himself (Spock seemed to be calculating the cost of all the items he'd selected and almost seemed to wince at the thought) they made their way back to the truck and loaded their purchases into the back seat. There almost wasn't enough room for everything.

"So, what did you think of our WalMart?" Asked Jim as they made their way back to the farm.

"It was the first I have ever seen, but I found it to be quite impressive." Replied Spock. "I have never encountered an establishment with such varied products. On Vulcan, we once had marketplaces like many of your desert countries. Even now, there are some outdoor venders who sell their wares. Though, many shopping areas are indoors as well. Perhaps it is a more logical way of managing space to have it all located in one facility."

"Yeah, maybe." Agreed Jim absently. As angry as he'd been over the thought of being carted back to Vulcan like some unwanted houseguest, he couldn't help but be a little curious about where Spock came from. He wasn't sure he wanted to get into that now though.

Once they arrived back at the farm, Jim began hauling bags inside. To his great surprise, Spock began picking up bags as well.

"You don't have to do that." He said quickly.

"It is no trouble." Said Spock dismissively.

"You're my guest." He protested. Spock ignored him.

"I will be making use of many of the items you purchased. I intend to repay you for whatever those items cost you. I also intend to 'do my fair share', to put it in human terms." With that, he started to take the bags containing his clothing up to his room.

"Hang on." Called Jim, snapping out of his stupor. "You should probably wash those first. You don't know how many other people might have tried those on." He added, seeing Spock's look of confusion. He fought the urge to laugh as Spock fought to hide disgust at the thought of who might have worn those clothes before him, clearly imagining the worst. Jim just tried to hide his amusement as he directed Spock to the laundry room so he could deposit his new clothes. Jim quickly sorted out the groceries and put them away before heading back out to the barn.

* * *

><p>Spock finished sorting his laundry out according to the labels on the tags and returned to the window in time to see Jim unloading the animal feed and straw from the back of his truck into the barn. Spock hurried out to the barn to join him. Jim had most of it done already, but Spock had to ask.<p>

"Is there anything I may help you with?" He asked. Jim looked at him in a measuring way before nodding.

"Sure, just follow me." Spock did as he said and placed the feed and straw where Jim directed him. When they finished, Jim gestured back toward the house. "You can go back inside. I'm gonna check out my crop now." Spock balked at the idea of being sent away.

"May I accompany you?" He asked. "I know little of sunflowers, and I would welcome the opportunity to learn more." It wasn't a total lie; he was always interested in learning. He just wasn't including his interest in learning about Jim. Jim's response to his request caught him off guard.

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"I see." Said Spock, not knowing what else he could say. If Jim didn't want him present, then there just wasn't anything he could do about it. Jim seemed to catch his thoughts though, because he spoke again quickly.

"I don't mean that I don't want you to go into the fields or anything. It's just I didn't know you were going to ask me that. You don't have the right kind of footwear for that. You need tough work boots, something to protect you from snakes. They like to hide out in sunflower fields." Spock felt a sensation of unease at the thought.

"Do Terren snakes like sunflower seeds?" He asked uneasily.

"No," said Jim, "but mice do. And snakes love mice. Birds too."

"I see." Said Spock again, for a different reason this time. He resolved to get the proper footwear at the earliest opportunity. He rather disliked the thought of Jim being alone in those fields with potentially dangerous animals. "Are there many venomous snakes in Iowa?"

"A few." Replied Jim. "I think most of them are rattlesnakes, but I don't think they like farm fields. I've know I've never seen one out there. I'd almost rather have them there; at least if I ever came across one, I'd have a warning. The ones I have to worry about here are copperheads. They don't have rattles, which makes them really dangerous, and they eat mostly mice, so my fields are like an all-you-can-eat buffet to them. I have seen a few of those over the years."

"Have you ever been bitten?" Asked Spock, unable to help himself.

"No." Replied Jim. "But I go through anti-venom treatments like almost all farmers do. I mostly keep up with the Northern Copperhead ones, but I go hiking and camping every once in a while, so I get the others too." Spock was mollified to hear this. "Anyway," continued Jim, "I just need to check on the coverings for the flowers. I have to use cheesecloth to keep mice and birds from getting the seeds. I'll just need a couple hours to walk through the rows and check all the heads." He paused, then added, "I could show you the greenhouse later. Sunflowers grow better if you start them out indoors and then transplant them."

"Very well." Said Spock with a nod. "If you do not mind, I will prepare a meal while you are out."

"Sure, that works." Agreed Jim. "I won't be gone too long." With that, he headed out the door.

Spock started to get out dishes to prepare dinner with, but paused when he remembered that he needed to check his messages. He pulled out his padd and began looking through. His mother had sent a request for notification of his safe arrival. He quickly sent her the message, including an apology for being late in replying. He found a quick message from Stonn asking how things were progressing with Jim. He sent a message back detailing that things were fine so far, including a brief mention of Jim's sunflowers. Then he found a message from his father.

It took considerable will just to open the message. He had a feeling that he wasn't going to like what it said. He was right.

_Spock,_

_ I believe you may have spoken in haste about staying on Earth while your bond with Mr. Kirk settles. There is a celebration at the Embassy in Arizona. I believe it would be wise for you to attend in order to discuss your plans in person and demonstrate that there is no instability in our family relationship. If anything, please attend for your mother's sake. She is quite worried about how you will fare amongst the humans after we return to Vulcan._

_Please contact me soon._

Spock felt furious. He knew his father's real interest in having him attend stemmed from the fact that there were delegates who expected him to be there and would suspect Sarek of not being able to keep his own house in order if he was not there. He did not send a reply; he merely shut off his padd and began preparing a dinner for himself and Jim.

* * *

><p>Jim was a little distracted as he went through his fields, checking his crop. Spock almost seemed to get nervous when he mentioned snakes in the flowers. Maybe he had a problem with them. A phobia of snakes was understandable. At least it wasn't something weird, like a fear of milk or something. He'd heard something like that once on an old tv show.<p>

After finishing his survey on the heads, making sure none were damaged by the local animals, Jim headed back to the farmhouse. He entered to the smell of a frozen vegetarian lasagna he'd bought cooling on the kitchen table. Spock on the other hand, was not to be seen.

"Spock?" Called Jim, wondering if he was getting washed up for dinner or something. After a moment, Spock appeared in the doorway. He looked…terrible.

"My apologies." He said quietly. "I was simply trying to engage in meditation. I have not been successful."

"What's wrong?" Asked Jim.

"My father sent me a message requesting that I attend a diplomatic function in Arizona. He wishes for us to show his colleagues that there is no issue with his personal life." Spock's voice became increasingly bitter as he spoke.

"What do you mean?" Asked Jim

"My father does not want anyone to doubt his diplomatic capabilities. His intent is that my presence will dispel any rumors that I am not present because he failed to keep me in line."

"Oh man." Said Jim sympathetically.

"I also believe that he once again hopes to convince me to return to Vulcan with him and apologize to the VSA council in the hopes of convincing them to reconsider my acceptance there."

Jim hesitated. It was true; going to Vulcan was the last thing he wanted to do. There was no way at this point that Spock could go to Vulcan without taking Jim with him. But at the same time, Jim had to wonder. From what he could tell, Spock was this super-genius with a real future ahead of him, not chained to a piece of land with no idea what else he could do for the rest of his life. Jim was proud of his land, in a way, but he also knew he probably could have done a million other things that most people would think were more important. So it was in all seriousness that he said what he did next.

"Maybe you should go." Spock looked about as surprised as he'd ever thought a Vulcan could look. Jim continued on. "You worked for like, your whole life to get into this place, so shouldn't you maybe give it another shot? I mean, could it be that you really want to be there?" Spock considered his words.

"No." He finally said. "It is true, I dedicated my entire life to gaining admission to the Academy, but it was because of more than just my father's expectations. I had hoped that once I proved myself Vulcan enough to attend, I would have the acceptance I was denied by my peers in my childhood. I was accepted, but only as a member, not a fellow Vulcan. A kind of acceptance that was truly just tolerance under the guise of political correctness. I would never be able to truly thrive there."

"Okay." Jim said quietly. That sounded pretty final to him. "But maybe you should still go to the meeting."

"Why?" Asked Spock, looking confused again. Jim shrugged.

"I know you and your dad fought about it, but did you really explain all that to him? Maybe if you did it without getting angry, if you let him see how you actually felt about all of that, he'd understand." Jim paused for a moment, choosing his next words carefully. "At least give it a chance. You never know what's gonna happen. My mom died of cancer in spite of all the medical advancements we've made, and I never really took the chance to make things right with her. I thought I was going to be home from seeing my brother by now, and that didn't happen because of something that happened by chance. I could've been killed, or something might happen to either one of us before we get a chance to see each other again. If I had known any of that stuff would happen, I might have tried to reach out first. For all you know, this might be the only chance you have to settle things with your dad." He paused to let his words sink in. "Or, at least go to see your mom off. She's a good lady; she deserves that much." Spock seemed deep in thought for a moment. Then he nodded decisively.

"Very well. I will attend."

"Okay." Replied Jim. "Do I need to pack or anything? Is it an overnight thing?"

"What do you mean?" Asked Spock.

"We can't stay too far apart, remember? I have to go with you."

"I had not thought of that." Murmured Spock, looking embarrassed.

"Well, I did, and I suggested it anyway." Said Jim with a little grin. "Besides, in situations like these, it's usually good to have someone there who's got your back." Spock looked surprised again, and then his eyes seemed to warm.

"Thank you, Jim." He said quietly. Then he seemed to catch himself. "You need not pack anything. The event only lasts a day, and we will be able to return shortly. We will need to leave very early tomorrow, however." Jim nodded.

"I can do that. I just need to make sure some stuff gets done tonight, and then I'll go dig out some of my nicer clothes. So, ready to eat?"

"Yes, of course." Said Spock as Jim took his seat at the table.

After they'd finished eating, Jim started to head back to work when Spock spoke.

"Jim." He said quietly. "I would gladly have your back too." Jim stared at him for a moment, startled.

"Thanks." He said quietly, before going out to see to his work.

* * *

><p>Spock prepared himself for bed that night. He pondered what he would say to his father when he arrived at the conference. He'd said the words before, but he'd said them in anger. Perhaps if he approached the situation a little more rationally, his father would actually hear the words. Another thing that occupied his mind was what Jim had said.<p>

Jim did not seem to like his father. Given his treatment of him, Spock didn't blame him. He didn't find his father too likable either at moments like that. Yet Jim was concerned enough about the long term affects of his decisions to actually suggest that he change his mind. He was…concerned for him. That gave Spock the same warm feeling he got from any little gesture Jim made for the sake of his comfort. He didn't know what he was going to say to his father, but having Jim react to his situation as if Spock were a friend in trouble…it was comforting.

Spock settled in for the night, taking some reassurance from the fact that he was going to have someone with him who really had his best interests at heart. It was almost hard to believe that he'd found that in Jim, the man who stood so much to lose if he left. At best, he might have to live on Vulcan until the bond could be dissolved. At worst, he could be left with permanent brain damage. Spock had never imagined having such a friend growing up. He could only hope that someday, Jim would be more than a friend.

* * *

><p>Jim woke to the sound of some insistent beeping. He realized it was his desktop comm was going off. He rose groggily and stumbled over to the comm, pulling on a robe as he went. He answered the message, half intending to tell the sender exactly how he felt about two a.m. calls. His mind went blank as Ambassador Sarek's emotionless face appeared on his screen.<p>

"Mr. Kirk." He said flatly.

"Ambassador." He replied, trying to hide how angry being awakened in the middle of the night tended to make him.

"I have sent a message to Spock, but he has not replied. Has he said anything to you?" Asked Sarek. Jim decided to try and wring some information out of the guy.

"What would he want to talk to you about?" He asked, going for a casual attitude. Sarek's gaze grew even colder, if that was possible.

"I am urging him to reconsider his choice to stay on Earth until the bond can be broken. I understand that you do not wish to come to Vulcan, but it cannot be helped. Spock can still have a prosperous future ahead of him-"

"Whereas I'm just some human nobody who should be honored to sacrifice who knows how much time to make sure your plans to keep your good family name untarnished?"

"I understand that this is an inconvenience." Said Sarek, his voice damnably even. "However, you're continued running of a family farm and doing a common labor job are little compared to where Spock may go with his life."

"And just what the hell gives you the right to decide that?" Snapped Jim, not bothering to sensor himself anymore. "Just because I don't do work that takes me amazing places or pays a fortune, doesn't mean I don't have rights too! You obviously think that the protection and power that your cushy job gets you allows you to push around whoever you want, even your own son, but I'm not gonna let you tell me that I matter less than anyone else, or that I should just give up my own life for someone else's benefit! No one can decide that but me!"

"Then you clearly do not care about Spock's future." Said Sarek coldly. "If you can be so selfish that you will not help him in this way, how worthy of respect can you be?"

"I'd consider it if I thought for one second that this was actually for him." Said Jim, equally cold. "But it's not, is it? It's about you. If he proves he's good enough, then you're good enough too."

"That is not true." Snapped Sarek. "I have Spock's best interests at heart."

"Well, I don't believe that, and neither does he." Retorted Jim.

"I am his father; it is my duty to him to make sure that he has the best opportunities in life." Said Sarek, practically sneering. "You had a father for less than five minutes, so you cannot possibly understand my motivation or Spock's feelings in the matter." Jim barely took a second to feel the sting of those words, even though they were totally uncalled for, before he retorted.

"I always assumed my life would be better if my dad was there, but if what you guys have is a normal father-son relationship, then maybe _I_ was the lucky one." He had just another second to see Sarek's face go white before he cut the connection and turned off the comm, ensuring that the man would be unable to call back. Knowing that he wasn't going to get back to sleep, Jim threw on his clothes and went outside to finish taking care of what needed to be done before he left with Spock. Then he froze.

If he told Spock about the conversation with his father, he might choose not to go to the event in Arizona. Jim still wanted him to get the chance to sort things out with his dad before he left, lest there be some complication that prevented them from talking again. Then again, Jim was pretty sure he'd really riled up Sarek, and it would probably reflect in their conversation. Jim didn't think Spock would blame him for the way he acted; if anything, he'd probably blame Sarek. Eventually, Jim decided to keep his mouth shut about the call, but to advise Spock to be patient. It was the only advice he could think to give. He glanced out the greenhouse window and saw the first rays of sunlight. He headed back inside to get ready for the trip.

* * *

><p>Thus ends the ten thousand word apology chapter. Again, I'm extremely sorry about how late this is, and I'll do my best to not take so long next time, though it'll be a lot shorter. Big thanks to everyone who hasn't given up on me! While I'm on the subject of posting, does anyone here post on the KS Archive? I tried to post a chapter there too, but I couldn't seem to do it the way I always have or with any other way I've tried. Did something change while I was away? I'd appreciate any help.<p> 


	15. Chapter 15

I have no excuse for how late this is, other than that I seem to have lost all motivation for writing. I've just been getting this little chapter done in bits and pieces, but I am trying. I'm also trying out other fandoms and have started other stories to try and work on when I can't focus on this one. So, here's a very, very late chapter. I'll try to pick up the pace.

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><p>Chapter Fifteen<p>

Spock rose from a slightly restless slumber. He had been debating with himself over what to say to his father, and no real answer was forthcoming. He also worried over bringing Jim with him. Jim likely wasn't used to stuffy diplomats and fancy dinners. He stepped out into the hallway and was surprised to see that Jim's bedroom door open. A quick, discreet glance inside showed that Jim was not inside. Spock went down the stairs into the kitchen to see if Jim had got up early to prepare himself breakfast. He was not there either. Spock focused his ears to try and detect any sound of Jim in the house, and found none. Then, he looked out the window and saw a light on in one of the buildings. The greenhouse, he recalled. Jim kept his seedlings in there to begin their growth before planting. He was probably doing some last minute work before their departure. Spock decided to wait inside and fix himself a light breakfast and get himself ready.

He was upstairs again when Jim came back inside. He heard a knock on his door. He opened it to find Jim standing there.

"Hey, Spock." He said. "It's almost seven, what time do you want to leave?"

"It would be best if we can leave in the next thirty minutes. It will only take an hour to reach Arizona."

"Okay." Said Jim. "I'll get changed and we'll go." He hurried over to his room and shut the door. Spock stared after him thoughtfully. Jim almost seemed worried about something. Perhaps he was nervous about attending an official function. As a civilian, it would make sense for him to feel ill at ease in such an unfamiliar situation. Spock headed back down to the kitchen. As he sat down at the table, Spock realized that he had no idea how he was going to explain Jim to the people there. He couldn't really introduce Jim as his spouse; it would probably upset him, and their 'wedding' probably hadn't been officially documented and technically didn't exist outside of Vulcan custom. Even his family probably wasn't considering it a true bonding. Spock wasn't sure _he_ considered it a true bonding.

In more primitive times on Vulcan, a forced bonding could have been considered legitimate. If one or both parties were incapable of controlling their actions, going as far as to steal their mates away from their families, and the bonding occurred without total consent, they would simply settle into life together, as was expected of them or try to break it somehow. Nowadays, there were serious consequences for Vulcans who tried to forcibly claim a mate. It was the main reason for the arrangements parents made for their young children.

He decided the best course of action would be to introduce Jim by name, as his friend who was housing him on Earth as a favor. It was true enough. Jim was allowing him to stay to return his hospitality on board the ship. That was all anyone else really needed to know. The rest was no one's business but their own.

Spock gathered up his padd and shoulder bag and went down to the kitchen to meet Jim. They would get through this.

* * *

><p>Jim had cleaned up and was debating what to wear. Spock hadn't really established any kind of dress code, and Jim knew the last thing he wanted was to embarrass the guy who'd rescued him and brought him home. He decided to go somewhat casual. Of course, jeans and a t-shirt were obviously out. Jim didn't really own any kind of formal wear, but he did have a few semi-formal things. He finally settled on a pair of fairly new khakis and a blue dress shirt.<p>

He added his good pair of brown dress shoes and spent a few minutes meticulously combing his hair into place. Deciding he looked respectable enough, he headed down to the kitchen. He saw Spock standing by the door in his usual Vulcan garb and cleared his throat to announce his presence.

"So," he said, trying not to sound nervous, "do I look okay for this kind of thing?" Spock's eyes moved up and down his form slowly, and Jim fought the urge to squirm.

"Your attire is more than acceptable." Said Spock with a nod. "Are you ready to depart?"

"Yeah, all set." Replied Jim. He grabbed up the bag he'd prepared earlier. They stepped out the door and he locked the house up. Then they boarded the shuttle. Jim strapped himself in, wondering why he felt so relieved about Spock approving his outfit. Sure, he liked the guy, but it wasn't like he needed his approval. Of course, he'd never spent a lot of time around someone as smart or sophisticated as Spock. Maybe it was normal to seek approval from people like that.

Jim hadn't sought approval from anyone in a long time. The earliest case had, of course, been his mother. She'd ignored all of his attempts and he'd given up quickly. He'd never sought approval from Frank. As far as he'd been concerned, Frank was a drunken waste of time and space, not at all worth his effort. His teachers had assumed his attempts to impress them were his way of acting out, showing off how smart he was to upstage his classmates. The only one who's approval he'd sought out consistently was Sam's, and that had ended the day he left Jim alone with Frank.

The most recent one, he knew, was Ruth. He'd wanted so badly to prove that he was good enough for her, and that had all just blown up in his face. Since then, he hadn't let himself care what anyone thought about him. He never wanted to be disappointed like that again. Why then, did he care if Spock liked his outfit? Jim pondered this he watched the landscape below them. Maybe…maybe it was because he kind of liked Spock. He seemed like a pretty cool guy. He was nothing like the guys Jim usually hung out with; a bunch of future farmers/alcoholics. It was probably the most bizarre friendship that ever existed, but that's what it felt like to Jim. Spock was his friend. Surely there was nothing wrong with caring about what a friend thought of him. Of course, that begged the question; did Spock care about Jim's opinion of him?

And what about that dream? Jim didn't know what to think about it. Based on that, it seemed like He was very attracted to Spock. It was true, Spock was a pretty handsome guy, but that didn't mean that Jim wanted to have sex with him again. Jim would never think of hitting on a Vulcan, let alone sleeping with one. Just look what that got him into. Though, it wasn't like Spock didn't deserve to have people pay that kind of attention to him. Jim fought back a sigh. It was way too early to be having these kinds of thoughts.

* * *

><p>Spock couldn't deny that he felt relief when they touched down in Arizona. The silence had been a little uncomfortable. He didn't know if it was because Jim did not want to leave home again so soon, or if it had something to do with the location. Either way, he sensed some kind of reluctance on Jim's part.<p>

"We are here." Announced Spock, probably unnecessary since Jim's eyes had been glued to the landscape the whole time. They stepped out and he gestured to the entrance. "This way." He and Jim walked forward side by side. As they moved toward the entrance, Spock sent a few covert glances Jim's way. The outfit he'd chosen looked appropriate for a civilian attending such a function. The shirt he was wearing seemed to show off his well-built frame in a tasteful way, and the color brought out his eyes nicely. The pants seemed to fulfill the same purpose for his lower body, hugging in certain places without being particularly suggestive. All in all, Jim looked very handsome.

"I will stay long enough to be seen and speak with some people." He told Jim as they approached the entrance. "It should take no more than a few hours, and we will return to Iowa. You need not even come in if you do not wish to. You may remain in the shuttle."

"Do you think I should stay there?" Asked Jim, looking uncertain. Spock realized Jim thought he might be embarrassed by him, since Jim was not part of his same 'social circle'.

"You might find something of interest inside." He offered. "And I do not intend to stay long. I will simply make an appearance and speak to my parents."

"Okay." Said Jim. I'll come in. I wouldn't mind talking to your mom again."

"Very well." Agreed Spock. They departed the shuttle, Jim carrying the small satchel with him. Jim seemed to take in the size of the building with awe.

"I've never been anywhere near a place like this." He remarked.

"I have." Replied Spock. "Many times. To use a human phrase, you are not missing anything." Jim grinned and some of the tension seemed to leave his body.

"Okay then, I'm right behind you."

Jim followed him into the building and through the checkpoint. The guard who handled his bag gave him a strange look, but let him pass. They came into a large reception area where diplomats and personnel from various worlds mingled. Spock watched as Jim took in the whole event before him with obvious curiosity.

"How many diplomats are here?" He asked, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"Dozens for certain." Replied Spock. "Is that a problem?"

"No." Said Jim, looking a little sheepish. "It's just, back home I would have been banned from something like this, since I could never seem to stay out of trouble. I would have done something really stupid, like replace the food with something nasty, or rig a paint bomb to explode on a timer. So being in the kind of place that I usually got kicked out of when I was a kid is a little weird." Spock had to repress the urge to smile. It was amazing really, how much he had to do that in Jim's presence.

"I trust we shall have no such incidents here?" He asked coyly. Jim chuckled.

"No, even I can't put something like that together on such short notice. Though, if you really want, I could back up a few toilets…" Spock was forced to allow his lips to quirk up ever so slightly.

"That will not be necessary, though I appreciate your consideration." Jim grinned and opened his mouth to answer back before he saw something over Spock's shoulder.

"Hey." He muttered, nodding at whatever he saw. Spock turned around. His father was standing there, with his mother and Stonn on either side.

"Spock." Said Sarek, giving nothing away. "You came."

"Yes." He replied, not knowing what else to say.

"I would speak with you privately." Sarek said, gesturing toward a doorway. Spock started forward, then hesitated, looking back at Jim. He didn't know whether or not Jim would be alright on his own. As he thought this, Amanda and Stonn moved past Sarek and stood with Jim. Their gesture made it clear that they would look out for him. Jim seemed to realize this as well because he nodded to Spock and visibly relaxed. Spock turned back to Sarek and followed him through the doorway.

Once the door was closed behind them, Sarek began speaking.

"It is good that you came, Spock. I wish to continue our conversation from the last time we spoke. I believe we both said things without putting enough thought into them. I have had time to consider my words; I hope you have done the same." Spock studied his father for a moment, then slowly shook his head.

"I realize this is an insult to you and a blow to your image, but a life in the Vulcan Science Academy would not suit me." Sarek's gaze hardened.

"Why does everyone seem to believe that I am doing all of this for the sake of my own image? The VSA is one of the most prestigious institutions in the entire Federation. It is an ideal place for a Vulcan to receive an education."

"But not a human." Said Spock quietly. "For as long as I can remember, you have acted as if my human side does not exist, unless it came up as the reason of my continuous failure to live up to your expectations of me. And as _human_ as it may make me sound, the fact that my own father is not among the handful of Vulcans who accept all of who I am is very…upsetting."

"I have always accepted who you are." Argued Sarek. "I would not have worked so hard to bring you into existence if I did not."

"Then why was I told, at only eight years of age, to choose what I would be before being given the chance to review all of my options?" Asked Spock. "You told me I would have to choose whether to be Vulcan or human, and as a Vulcan on the outside, surrounded by other Vulcans who would tolerate nothing less than absolute perfection, what choice did I really have?" Sarek studied Spock intently.

"I did not know you felt that way." He said.

"I was not supposed to show that I felt anything at all." Replied Spock, allowing bitterness to creep into his tone. "I have no desire to spend my life chasing approval I will never receive. No matter how many achievements I make in the name of the Vulcan people, they will never accept me as one of their own. I believe on Earth, not only will I be able to learn more about the other half of my heritage, but I will be able to live among a culturally diverse group, as Earth is such a prominent figure in the Federation's mission for cultural exchange. I believe I will find a far less hostile environment here."  
>"Perhaps that is true." Admitted Sarek, "But would it be worth leaving your family, and all you have ever known behind?"<p>

"I truly regret that I cannot be the perfect Vulcan son, and that you will be seen as a failure again, but I must truly choose my own way now." Said Spock. Sarek looked shocked.

"In what way would I be seen as a failure?"

"I am aware that Sybok's desertion of Surak's teachings caused great damage to your credibility, but unless there is a way to permanently remove my human genetics, you will never be able to prove that you could raise a perfect Vulcan."

"Is that what you believe?" Asked Sarek, stunned. "That I would agree to have a hybrid child to prove that I could raise it as a true Vulcan and erase my mistakes with Sybok?"

"Why else?" Asked Spock in return. "Other than to keep Mother happy, you had no reason to complicate your life in such a way." Spock paused to take a breath. "It does not matter how long we argue; my mind is made up. I am staying here on Earth. I do not yet know what I will do in the way of a career. I imagine I will have to find some kind of education, but for now I intend to fulfill the promise I made to Jim. And no matter how many times you try to suggest otherwise, this decision is not being made in the heat of the moment. It has been many years coming. I do not wish to hurt you Father, but I am tired of hurting for you." Spock turned to leave, only to be stopped by and hand grasping his arm.

"Spock!"

The desperation in Sarek's voice stopped Spock from simply shaking the hand off. He turned back to his father. Sarek appeared to be choosing his words very carefully.

"It is true, your mother was the one who pressed for us to have a child, and I did comply to make her happy. But I wanted it as well. Many people see children as an ultimate affirmation of two people's devotion and commitment to each other. I wanted to have something that represented that. I wanted something that was equal parts her and myself. Spock, you were not created for me to prove myself to my peers. I do admit, when Sybok left home to pursue his ideals, I became stricter with you. I also admit that it was in part due to our people's opinions of my ability to command respect. But more than anything, I was concerned that you would wish to leave as well if I taught you too much of life beyond Vulcan."

"I already wished to leave then." Spock told him. "The day Sybok left, I begged to be allowed to go with him. He told me I was too young. I hoped he would return one day, but he never did, and knew that hope to be illogical."

"I am beginning to understand that." Said Sarek. "And if you truly believe this is the correct path for you, then you should take it."

"Then you accept my decision?" Asked Spock, stunned.

"I do." Replied Sarek with a nod. "I only regret that in my quest not to lose my other son, I drove him away."

"The fact that I am pursuing a different lifestyle does not mean I will cease to be your son." Said Spock. "The lessons you have taught me will be with me for the rest of my life. They will not leave me because I am learning new things."

"It reassures me to know that." Admitted Sarek. "I was already resigned to the choice you have made, but I was certain it was impossible for us not to part on negative terms. With our apparently lifelong misunderstanding of each other, I was certain you would cut me out of your life, especially after speaking with Mr. Kirk."

"You have spoken with Jim?" Asked Spock, surprised. Sarek also looked surprised.

"He did not tell you I contacted him? We argued over his comm unit. I was unkind in my argument. He said that you did not believe I had your best interests motivating my actions, and I see now that he was right. But yesterday I told him that as he did not have a father, he could not understand my actions." Spock's gaze grew cold.

"You had no right to say that to him." He said flatly.

"I know that." Agreed Sarek. "And said to me in reply that if our relationship was a normal one, he felt better off having never had a father. After he disconnected my call, I became concerned that you might feel the same way, that you would be better off disowning me and my name, and everything I ever shared with you." The coldness in Spock's eyes began to disappear.

"I cannot defend Jim's words toward you." He said.

"I am not asking you to." Said Sarek. "I simply wish for you to know that I do not wish for us to be permanently estranged."

"I do not wish that either." Said Spock quietly. "But there is something you should know about Jim. During my time with him, I intend to get to know him better and eventually, if he is willing, pursue him properly as one should a potential mate." Sarek silently studied Spock's face.

"For you to have a bond as strong as you already do…In ancient times such compatibility was considered sacred. Couples would be allowed to bond immediately regardless of prior matches or commitments or even if they had never met before, and no one was permitted to question it. Perhaps the bond you have with Mr. Kirk will motivate him to allow you to do what you wish and court him properly."

"Then you have no objection to my choice in this matter?" Asked Spock, hardly daring to believe.

"I do not believe it would matter if I objected." Said Sarek. "But if he is indeed the best possible choice of bondmate for you, then it is only logical for you to pursue him."

"Logical?" Asked Spock, a hint of humor in his tone.

"It is possible to make a choice based on both emotion and logic." Replied Sarek, mirroring his son's tone. "I did so when I married your mother." Spock almost smiled.

"Thank you." He said. Sarek reached out and brushed his hand against Spock's, a common gesture of affection between parents and children that they had not shared in years.

"We will speak again soon." Was all he said. Spock nodded. The both turned to the door to return to the crowded lobby.

* * *

><p>Jim was busy telling Stonn about some of the local plant life in Iowa when he caught movement out of the corner of his eye. Spock and Sarek were both returning to the reception. Jim couldn't tell about Sarek, but Spock looked like the weight of the whole world had just been lifted off of his shoulders.<p>

"Hey." He said slowly, not quite sure how to ask if everything was alright. "You uh, you ready to go?"

"Yes." Said Spock, seeming to catch his meaning. "We may leave now."

"Okay." Said Jim, smiling. He started to follow Spock to the entrance, then remembered something he'd meant to do. He turned back to Amanda and Stonn and reached into his bag. "Here, these are for you guys." He handed two decent sized bags of seeds to them. "Special family recipe." He said with a grin. Then he reached back into the back and pulled out a few seedlings and a data chip, which he handed to Stonn. "See if you can grow these on Vulcan." He said.

"Thank you, Jim." Said Stonn. Jim wasn't sure, but Stonn looked pleased.

"We'll be sure to call again before we leave orbit." Promised Amanda.

"Cool." Said Jim. Spock nodded his acquiescence. Then they continued on their way outside.

They reached the shuttle and strapped in.

"Things go okay with your dad?" Asked Jim, as they waited for the shuttle to power up.

"Yes, surprisingly so." Replied Spock. "I believe we were able to reach an understanding. And that our relationship will vastly improve from this point." He paused before adding, "He told me of your conversation yesterday." Jim felt a sliver of uncertainty.

"Yeah, about that…I kinda just shot my mouth off there."

"I believe my father also 'shot his mouth off. But what you said actually made him reconsider his position today. So, I am grateful for it."

"Oh." Said Jim. "Okay then."

The shuttle lifted off.

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><p>Again, I can't say how sorry I am. I'll be trying to catch up on my writing in any spare time I have. Thanks for sticking with me!<p> 


	16. Chapter 16

**I'm back! I'm so ashamed of how late this is. I wish I could blame it all on work or other stuff, but I got lazy. I spent all my time reading other fanfiction instead of writing it. By the time I was finally ready to type again, something went wrong with my computer. I finally got around to looking into how I might type and post from an iPad. Since I hadn't started on this, I didn't have to try and type it from memory, but unless I find a way to get my iPad connected to the flash drive that has all my other work, I won't be able to continue with my Avengers story or work on any of the other stories I was starting out on. Can anybody offer some advice on that front? In the meantime, I sincerely hope you enjoy this ridiculously short and overdue filler chapter, the sole purpose of which is to announce my return. Last time on Love For Sale, Jim talked Spock into talking to his dad and it went shockingly well. Here is what happened next.**

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><p>Spock set the shuttle down behind the farmhouse and Jim stood up, stretching slightly as he did so.<p>

"I'm gonna have to change and retake care of some things before I can start dinner." He told Spock apologetically. It was getting late and he needEd to check on his boarded animals before he did anything else.

"Perhaps I could prepare dinner while you work." Offered Spock. "Then your schedule for the day will have not been too disrupted."

"Sounds like a plan." Said Jim with a nod and a smile. "Just program something into the replicator for tonight and we'll be good to go."

"Very well." Said Spock agreeably. "I will see you at dinner." They went their separate ways inside the house, both going to their rooms to change their clothes. Once in older, more worn clothing, Jim went out and grabbed a shovel. As he mucked out the horses stalls, he thought about how the meeting had gone.

Spock seemed to have taken a big step in resolving his issues with his father. Jim would have been lying to himself if he'd tried to ignore the twinge of jealousy he felt that his new friend had such a good relationship with his mother, and an improving one with his father. He was happy for Spock sure, but it was hard not to envy it. Jim would never get to know the feeling of a close relationship with a parent.

He shook the feeling off and finished cleaning out the stalls. He set out some feed for when the horses came in and headed inside to clean up. After a quick shower, he went back downstairs. Spock had made a simple pasta dish. Jim noticed that his actually had meat in it.

"Smells great." He offered as they took their seats. Spock looked down at his plate.

"While the compliment is appreciated, the smell, and the food it comes from is the work of the replicator." Jim opened his mouth to reply but stopped when he saw the glimmer in Spock's eyes. He couldn't help but snicker.

"Funny." He said. The glimmer faded.

"This is safe for your consumption, is it not? I do not wish to give you something that will make you sick."

"No, it's fine." Jim assured him. "It's locked against using anything that'll set off my allergies."

They began eating in silence. When they were almost finished, Jim spoke up.

"If you're still interested, I thought we could get you a good pair of boots tomorrow and I could show you the sunflowers." Spock looked surprised.

"That would be most appreciated, Jim. I am looking forward to learning more about your work here." Jim was almost surprised by the sincerity in Spock's voice. He shrugged awkwardly.

"It's not really very interesting." He said. "It's not nearly as complex as the type of things you're probably used to working on."

"I disagree." Said Spock. "I may learn something that will be important to my research. Vulcans believe that acquiring new knowledge is never a waste of time, as it may always be applied to a situation at a later date. Also, I am curious about your life here and would enjoy seeing this aspect of it." Jim blinked, then offered a smile.

"Well, okay then." With that, they gathered up their dishes. Jim stuck some leftovers in the refrigerator and set the dishwasher. He and Spock bid each other goodnight and went to their rooms. As Jim lay in his bed waiting to fall asleep (a dreamless one, hopefully) he thought about what Spock had said about wanting to learn about his life. He couldn't remember anyone ever being so genuinely interested his any aspect of his life. He also wondered if it really was genuine, or if the bond was just making Spock think that way. Maybe that was it. Or maybe spock was just trying to be friendly And didn't know how else to reach out to a human. Or maybe Jim was just over thinking the situation and should try to get some damn sleep already. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his mind so that he wouldn't be too tired to focus in the morning.

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><p>Spock lay awake in his room, going over the events of the day. It had not gone at all like he had expected. He had thought he would return with all ties to his father severed. Instead, it seemed they would might actually have a better, stronger relationship ahead of them. And it was all thanks to Jim. Jim,drawing on his own past experiences had advised him not to waste the opportunity to take what could have been his last chance at reconciliation, and it had been a success.<p>

Right now though, he really did need to get some sleep. He wanted to be in optimal form tomorrow as he observed a full day of Jim's everyday life. He had noticed Jim's brief hesitation when he responded to the invitation to see the fields. For a moment, he had been worried that he had overstepped some boundary by letting even only a little of his his eagerness show. But Jim had seemed to brush it off and their plans were still on. Spock realized he might have to 'tone it down' if he was to go at a pace Jim could be comfortable with. Even with their emotions kept in check, it was clear to those who knew the signs how devoted bondmates could be to each other.

Perhaps it was the new freedom he had been granted in expressing his human side, but Spock was finding it rather difficult to not simply go on and on to Jim about how impressed he was by his independence, intelligence, and generosity. Given the chance, he could probably wax poetic about Jim's eyes and body and heart. To a Vulcan, what he was feeling was normal. To a human, it would probably be classified as obsessive.

He did not want Jim to feel at all unnerved by him, or pressured by the fact that they were bonded. Perhaps some research into human courtship when he had a chance would shed some light on the situation. In the meantime, he should try to quiet his mind and prepare mentally for the day coming.

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><p><strong>Again, I'm sorry! I know it bums me out when someone who hasn't updated in forever just posts some short thing, but this popped out of me in a burst of guilt fueled inspiration, and I figure it's a start. Again, if anyone knows how to get to the word documents on a flash drive via iPad, I will be eternally grateful! I will do my best to not make you wait by long again!<strong>


	17. Chapter 17

Hi, guess who's back! Please accept this chapter as my since apology.

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><p>Spock woke to the sound of birds singing and the sunlight slowly creeping across the floor of his room. He looked at the chrono beside his bed. It read that it was just approaching 0600 hours. He recalled that farmers we rumored to wake at the 'crack of dawn' and realized that Jim was probably awake and preparing for the day already. He sat up and pushed the covers back. Jim was going to share his work experiences today. If Spock played this right, this could open the door to other possibilities.<p>

Spock got out of bed and began grooming himself for the day. He looked through some of the clothes he'd purchased on his trip to WalMart with Jim. He selected some of the heavy denim trousers (blue jeans) and a plain, grey, long sleeved shirt. As he finished dressing, he heard a knock on the door. He stood up and opened it to see Jim holding a pair of battered old work boots.

"Jim?" He asked. As far as he could tell, Jim was fully dressed, which included his own pair of boots.

"I remembered last night that some of my parents old things were stored up in the attic. I went looking and found some of my dad's old shoes. They seem sturdy enough, and I cleaned them with plenty of sanitizer. You could try them on, and if they fit, you can were them. If you want." The last sentence was spoken with a degree of uncertainty. Spock felt a surge of endearment.

"If they fit, then they will be more than adequate." He assured Jim. Jim grinned and held the boots out to him. Spock took them and sat back on the bed to try them on. Jim leaned back against the doorway.

"We still have a few minutes yet. You can get something to eat real quick if you want, and I'll check on the animals."

"That sounds like a logical start to the day." Said Spock agreeably. He finished tying the shoelaces and stood up. The boots certainly were sturdy, clearly meant to protect his feet from the elements. He took a few testing steps before he looked at Jim again.

"I believe they will do well."

"Cool." Said Jim with a grin. "I'll just be outside." With that, he left the room. Spock took some more steps about the room. The boots were harder than he was used to, and his feet would probably get sore later on, but as he tested them out he realized something; Jim had given him one of his possessions to use, but it was not like the other times. This was something of his father's, something he'd inherited from a deceased relative. Such things were sacred to Vulcans and it was not done lightly. Perhaps it was different with humans, but it still caused Spock to feel very warm inside.

He almost shook his head at the redundancy of the feeling. He was Vulcan, he was always warm inside.

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><p>Jim finished setting out the hay bales for when the Johnson kids stopped by after school let out. Their parents made sure they came by every day to check on their horses. Greg Johnson was a little more well off than the other farmers in the area, but he made sure his kids knew the value of earning something. He was one of those men that made Jim wonder what his relationship with his father might have been. Jim might have had more than his fare share dumped on him by Frank, though he was somewhat grateful for it. He did believe in hard work and discipline, and it was something that he'd always hoped his father would have passed along.<p>

Jim finished what he was doing and left the barn. He saw Spock coming out of the house and smiled at him. Spock did that thing where he smiled back with his eyes. They met in the middle of the yard.

"Do the boots fit okay?" He asked as they began walking side by side toward the fields.

"They fit quite well." Replied Spock. "They are slightly loose, which gave me room for a thicker pair of socks." Jim took a moment to observe what Spock was wearing. It was made more for autumn weather.

"Oh, it's probably chilly for you, isn't it?" He asked.

"I am fine; Vulcan is a desert planet. Like your deserts here, it becomes unexpectedly cold at night. We are capable of adapting to cooler temperatures. I will be able to function comfortably."

"Okay." Said Jim, and that was that. They reached the sunflowers and Jim began explaining the different parts of the plant to Spock. "As you can tell, they're in the flowering stage. My main concern at this point is to make sure that nothing disturbs thier growth, but then that's an important thing to do at any point. There's a risk of little animals like mice or birds gertting them, but my probes that moniter them tend to keep them away, like a little army of floating scarecrows."

"Scarecrows?" Asked Spock.

"Yeah, hundreds of years ago, people started putting up these scary looking dolls made of old clothes stuffed with straw. I guess the birds were meant to think they were a person and it kept them away."

"And this method worked?" Asked Spock dubiously. Jim shrugged.

"I've heard mixed results. But the probes take care of it for me, so I never tested it. Partly because there are a lot of horror movies that involve demonic scarecrows, and the thought of one sitting in the yard at night was a recurring nightmare of mine." He gestured to the plant again. "These are giant sunflowers, so they'll be huge when they're fully bloomed. I have to be precise about how much water and fertilizer they get, or they can drown. The probes do the watering, they're programmed to go to the well, but I have to fertilize them with the tractor. I had to space them far apart enough that I don't have to cut many of them out."

"Cut them out?" Questioned Spock?

"Yeah, if they start to lean into each other too much, some of them may need to be pruned. So basically I have to make sure that I don't have too many or I end up wasting merchandise." He gestured to the heads. "Once the petals fall off, they'll need to be covered up with cheesecloth for protection, then when they're ready, I'll harvest the heads."

"You will protect the heads by covering them with cheese?" Asked Spock, sounding perplexed. Jim grinned and shook his head.

"It's called that because it's most well known use is in making cheese."

"I see." Said Spock. "When will they be ready for harvest?"

"I planted them about two and a half months ago, at the start of March. They've got about another month, and then they'll be ready. Then begins the long process of clearing the land after the harvest and getting the land ready for next Spring." He paused and thought about what he'd told Spock. "It's a good thing farming's gotten a little easier, or I'd never have time for my main job."

"You do not consider farming your career?" Asked Spock. Jim shrugged.

"Not really. This is a pretty seasonal business, and I mostly just do it to make some extra money and make use of all the land. I wouldn't be doing much honor to my family if I just left it alone. My real job is computer and auto repair. Or it was." Seeing the question in Spock's eyes he added, "My boss said he couldn't keep my job. He's more interested in saving money on the intern who he pays next to nothing for the same work."

"Can you not press charges against him for wrongful termination?" Asked Spock.

"Maybe, but then it would get around town what happened and reporters would be hounding me, and it just seems like too much of a hassle. I'd rather just find another job. Not to brag, but I'm pretty good at what I do. I've still got some under the table clients who are faithful enough."

"Under the table?" Questioned Spock.

"It means that they pay me directly, rather than the agency I worked for. They pay me less than they would the agency, but it's more than I see after the agency takes tax deductions out of my earnings." Explained Jim.

"Is that legal?" Asked Spock, looking concerned. Jim grinned sheepishly.

"Not really." He admitted. "I mean, these are people I know who can't always afford a real shop. I don't take them on as official clients, I do the work on my own time, and they give me a little money for my effort. But I guess it is considered illegal. Who knows, maybe I should go into buisness for myself. I know plenty of repeat customers who would probably come to me if I opened my own computer repair shop."

"Do you believe fixing technology is your calling?" Asked Spock.

"I don't know about that." Said Jim. "It's good, steady work, and I enjoy doing it, but it's just a job. I don't know that there's a job that I'm destined to do waiting for me." He started to head back toward a shed at the end of the field.

"I suppose I understand. I always believed I would be best served pursuing a career in science, as it is a logic based field, and my main concern in life was proving that I could be logical enough to succeed in it. Perhaps I will someday, but it will not be after subjecting myself to yet more judgement from the Vulcan Science Academy. Attempting to be the perfect Vulcan was an unattainable goal. I have already observed significant diversity accepted on Earth. I believe the path to a more satisfactory outcome is here."

"I hope you're right." Said Jim, and he meant it. He hesitated before adding, "I can drop the side buisness if you're worried about getting caught up in something."

"It is not really my buisness, and they are not my actions. And as I am the son of an ambasador, I have diplomatic immunity." The last statement was made with a slight twinkle in his eyes that looked suspiciously like mischief.

"That'd be a nice perk if you were the type to get into trouble." Said Jim.

"I was considered a rather troubled youth." Admitted Spock. "I was provoked into several fights as a child, and my father's influence was likely the only reason there were not more lasting consequences." Jim scoffed.

"Whatever you could have done, it would have nothing on me. I was a terror as a kid. I once drove a car off of a cliff to piss off my stepdad." Spock looked a little like he'd swallowed a lemon.

"You drove a vehicle off of a cliff?" He asked slowly. Jim shrugged.

"Yeah, I did it on impulse. It was right after Sam left. I mean, literally minutes. Frank was making me wash my Dad's antique, twentieth century car and Sam told me he was going to sell it without even asking our mom. Then he just left me there. I had finished the outside and I got in it so I could dust off the interior. The keyes were just sitting under the visor, and I didn't even think. I started the car and got all the way out to a nearby quarry. I got as close as I could before I jumped out. I almost didn't make it, I managed to pull myself up about the same time the cops caught up with me."

"You could have been killed." Said Spock, still speaking slowly.

"Yeah, like I said, it was all on impulse." Replied Jim. "That was just the start of it. After that, I turned into a real Hell raiser. Though, you know where that got me." Jim fell silent, recalling how he'd opened up to Spock about his time on Tarsus IV. It was Spock's voice that broke him out of the memory.

"I suppose you are correct." He said. "Diplomatic immunity would not be enough to keep your record clean." Jim looked at him, startled. Though Spock's face was blank, Jim knew he was being teased. He smirked.

"Told you so." They moved along with the sunflowers.

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><p>Spock decided that he found sunflowers agreeable. They are large and bright, but not distractingly so. He thinks they would blend in well on his planet, if Stonn might ever find a way to make them grow there. As he listened to Jim describe them and their care he found another use for them; listening to Jim describe them was another excuse to listen to Jim speak. Spock also tool the opportunity to observe the landscape around him. The air was chilly for his taste, but the scenery was incredibly colorful. The deep blue sky, the green hills, the golden fields; Earth was a lovely planet. Of course, asthetic appeal had nothing to do with selection of a home planet, but it was certainly a bonus. Just like with his choice of mate, he couldn't help but think. It took him a moment to realize that Jim had asked him something.<p>

"Do you want to see the greenhouse next?" He asked. Spock nodded his assent.

"Yes, of course."

The greenhouse was notably warmer, due to the aptly named greenhouse effect. Spock looked at the long tables used for holding individually potted sunflowers.

"I'm using it for storage right now, since my crop's been moved outside, and I'll bring the seeds in here to package them for transport after they've been harvested." Explained Jim, gesturing to empty pots and watering pails.

"Where does your crop go?" Asked Spock.

"Most of it goes to this big corporation, and they divide it up for different things. Snack foods, bird feed, for the oil, that sort of thing. I keep some of it for myself, to keep up with old family recipes." Jim said.

"How do people prepare sunflower seeds for consumption?" Spock asked.

"People eat them salted, or honey roasted, or mix them with other snack foods to create a snack called trail mix. Sunflower oil can be used in backing, and in hair care products, believe it or not. I eat them every now and then, but it's kind of easy to get tired of something that's around all the time." Said Jim.

"That is understandable." Said Spock. "On Vulcan, not many experiment with variety in food. My mother, being human, is an exception. Still, now that I am on Earth, I believe I will take advantage of the variety of foods here. Not including dishes that contain meat, of course."

"Right." Said Jim, with a grin. They left the greenhouse and headed back toward the house. "Do Vulcan's only choose not to eat meat, or does it make you sick?"

"In a sense, it is both of those options." Said Spock. "In ancient times, Vulcans did hunt and kill animals for both food and sport. However, as many of those animals were both predatory and poisonous, they mostly relied on vegetation for nutrition. Then, Surak came forth and declared that because hunting and eating the wildlife was so risky, it was illogical to do so when we could survive without it. He also taught that hunting them made us animalistic ourselves, and that to be the superior species we believed ourselves to be, we needed to give up such barbaric tendencies, along with fighting each other for land instead of simply resolving our issues peacefully."

"So it's a choice that Vulcans made a long time ago that's lasted hundreds of years." Said Jim. "But you said it wasn't just a choice that has Vulcans not eating meat. What was the other reason?"

"You realize that mankind's more primitive ancesters did not always wash or cook their food, correct?" Asked Spock. At Jim's nod, he continued. "Human's ancesters at some point took to washing food, vegetation and meat alike. And there was also the discovery of fire and its uses, and they began using it to prepare food. Washing away the dirt and killing the germs for hundreds, even thousands of years caused the body to lose much of its tolerence for them in the process of evolution. Now, if you tried to eat raw meat, you would become ill. And many Vulcans cannot even stomach the smell of meat. They have lost their ability to process it. On the other hand, there are Vulcans that reject Surak's teachings, or simply interperet them differently. Their family lines have continued to consume meat, and they have no aversion to it."

"Wow." Said Jim. "Have you ever thought about trying it?"  
>"I have never felt curious about that sort of thing. I see no point in attempting to eat meat. It is one teaching of Surak's that I most certainly agree with. Even if I am capable of processing it, it would go against my beliefs." Spock told him. Jim shrugged.<p>

"Okay, cool." He said. They reached the front door. As they stepped inside, Jim asked,

"Do you want to try some new stuff now? We can try tweaking with the replicators a little, see if they can manage anything Vulcan."

"I believe I can add some data from my padd." Said Spock after a moment of consideration. Jim grinned.

"Let's do it then." They headed for the kitchen.

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><p>Okay, so I've done a terrible job of updating, but I got a real vacation for the first time in a few years and though I'm going back to work now, I'm a lot more refreshed. That, along with the fact that nothing really earth shattering is going to happen for a few chapters should help me catch up!<p> 


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